As was previously expected, the House of Dimon has begun raising base pay for investment bankers, just like everyone else, in move that won’t really mean anything re: more clams in your pocket. First years were informed yesterday they’re being bumped up to $80k. No word yet on bonus numbers, which were supposed to be announced last Tuesday. It’s unclear why Dimon and Steve Black have been dragging their heels on this one, but they should know there are some junior rainmakers out there who are not happy. They won’t technically be doing anything about it, but there will be be pissing and moaning amongst themselves. Oh, there will be P ‘n M’ing amongst themselves.
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just for the complaining, all of your asses are getting pounded. report to the lobby of 277 park at noon.
-JD
383 for some of you.
“junior rainmakers..”…….Uh huh….yep…..sure.
PS: Enjoyed the BC comics related currency description of “clams”.
That would make a great gay porn scenario. It touches a lot of the usual themes: fresh faced young boys, suits, hazing, ass pounding.
@4 did you not get the sarcasm inherent in calling them junior rainmakers? oh, you didn’t? is it cause you’re a re-tard?
“”junior rainmakers..”…….Uh huh….yep…..sure.”
report to the short bus, 4.
everyone here can blow me.
-j dimon
Why do they get bonus numbers now? What happens if Barney and Maxine go on a tear in the remaining six months and pass legislation barring that even though they have repaid TARP?
@9 b/c this is when first year bank analysts get them. next question.
what are first year pothead CEO emeritus numbers?
-jimmy cayne
Sweet – I can finally move out of the Metro and into Windsor Court!
@9 analysts are paid on the anniversary of their start (approximately).
@10 why doesn’t anyone seem to know this?
@14 – or care?
At least they don’t work for RBS. Last year’s bonus was a tank full of Mexican Coke Sharks.
@6 and @7…….Jeff Macke?
1st yr numbers
Top tier – Chase 0% APR balance transfer checks (3 total)
Mid tier – WaMu..I mean Chase free checking account
Bottom tier – forced relocation to Dallas
Comp watch at The House of Dimon.
Brings back fond memories. If my memory serves me correctly, I distinctly remember hearing these wonderful words…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VDW0ZnZxjn4&feature=related
Which is why I eventually left.
@16, they received Mexicans, not Mexican coke sharks. Big difference.
See you bags at Tenjune.
-MCS
paying analysts more! why didn’t we think of this sooner? this will solve all of our problems!
What is the real reason that they’re raising analyst pay? I don’t think any analysts would leave JPM or GS if their base pay was $70k.
@22 because the bonsues won’t be as big, genius.
Should we expect BofA and Citi to follow suit?
@23 why wouldn’t you simply pay them less?
It’s not like there is a ton of good jobs for college grads…
Steve Black speaking to interns at 4…WHO’S GOT A QUESTION?
Anyone know what bonuses are for jpmc sap integration staff? Also raises…
-Taj
Anyone know what bonuses are for jpmc sap integration staff? Also raises…
-Taj
22 “GS or JPM” implies that rank similarly in the employer of choice heirarchy. No way.
@25 you bump them to $80k, an extra $10k now, cut their intended bonuses by $15k, cognitive dissonance for first year junior rainmakers rationalizes this as okay, pocket the extra $5k per analyst. Then, next year, pay them $20k less than you would have originally and point to the $80k salary as justification.
“They won’t technically be doing anything about it, but there will be be pissing and moaning amongst themselves.”
…so, so true…
Does anyone know if Analysts in Asset Management got the bump as well?