I bet a lot of you probably thought that Lenny Dykstra wouldn't be happy with the fact that he's several pounds, concussions and meth binges removed from his fighting weight, and that anyone who's ever done business with the guy is now claiming he owes them big money. Well think again, derelicts! Nails, pictured here chewing on his favorite combo of dip and Twizzlers, absolutely loves it. He knows every single claim is unfounded bull, filed by crooks (WaMu especially, and by extension, Jamie Dimon). Here are some thoughts LD shared on the matter this weekend. On a personal note, now, more than ever, our offer of a columnist gig for the wordsmith, who seems to have only gotten more poetic with each blow to the skull, stands:
"F------ derelicts," Dykstra snaps about his growing list of hostile ex-business partners. "Where's a real respected businessman in our society who's suing me? We don't see one, do we?" Of his creditors, Dykstra says, "Look at these clowns...I love it, baby...Pile it on, bro."
As for countersuits, which will be filed just as soon as L to the D and his lawyer figure out how fill out the forms, Nails warns: "It's gonna be a big old ... right hook, and it's gonna take a lot of people down." On a related note, Kevin Coughlin, a former executive at Dykstra's magazine, "The Players Club," has diagnosed LD as exhibiting signs of "a classic psychopath," which Coughlin, showing no appreciation for the fact that this condition allows the big man to call out a fucking derelict clown when he sees one, seems to imply is a bad thing.
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 10:48AM
god love this fuckin guy.
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 10:48AM
"F------ derelicts,"
you don't think he's talking about me, do you?
-jim c
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 10:49AM
his hands are gigantic.
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 10:49AM
kiss my ass and suck my dick, everyone
-LD
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 10:53AM
the gift that keeps on giving
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 10:54AM
"a real respected businessman in our society"
awesome
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 10:54AM
Thanks for providing that pic. In a flash it brings down the raging hardon that I get every time I think of the Friday pic (hair, muscles, probably even a dirty sweaty jockstrap with cup under the uniform; yum).
- another homo banker
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 10:57AM
Who drove him to court? Wayne and Garth, with the licorice dispenser?
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 10:58AM
@3 Lobsterclops
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:00AM
Wonder if Nails knows if you bite off both ends you can use them as a straw?
--Doc Gooden
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:00AM
Tough as Nails, bitches!
Jefferies Analyst
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:02AM
Did I or did I not tell you guys LD is one of the greats?
-JC
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:03AM
"Where's a real respected businessman in our society who's suing me? We don't see one, do we?"
Love the inherent meaning...
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:05AM
Break me off a piece of that.
-Ruth M
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:07AM
sHe is a sexy kind of hell.
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:09AM
Bess, you need to write LD's biography, and call it, "Fucking Derelicts"
Posted by merkin capital partners , Jul 13, 2009 11:09AM
kiss my dick and suck my ass.
-BM
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:09AM
After seeing the agonizingly embarrasing "Nails Show" I am ready to let Pete Rose into the Hall of Fame.
~Judge Kenesaw Mountain Landis
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:11AM
Lenny the lemming on tha loose
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:14AM
Bess, based on what appear to be your favorite men to write about, how about coming up with a musical starring Nails, Chaz Gasparino, and Stevie-boy, as long lost brothers?
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:15AM
Look at these clowns! Look at these fucking clowns! Clowns! Fucking! Fucking! Clowns! Flowns! Clucking! Clucking Flowns!
-LD
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:16AM
great tags.
-JC
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:17AM
"Where's a real respected businessman in our society who's suing me? We don't see one, do we?"
Can't exactly get sued by them if they were never willing to do business with you in the first place...
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:21AM
Dumb ass should have started a f***ing ponzi scheme
-A Stanford
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:22AM
Damn I could go for some Twizzlers right about now.
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:24AM
If your man is bankrupt and enjoys Skoal and Twizzlers at the same that's a Dealbreaker, ladies!
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:26AM
I would let him feed me delicious fried chicken any day.
TT
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:28AM
Lenny: what do you think is the primary cause of your obvious cognative impairment -- a)steriods, b) running head-first into the center field wall a few too many times or c) all of the above?
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:30AM
@28 all of the above. any other brain busters ya got for me?
-LD
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:30AM
My kind of guy.
~John Rocker
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:33AM
Guess my book idea wasn't so novel.
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:34AM
@24. what he did was kind of ponzi scheme lite. like a person with no job or prospects who gets by forging credit card applications... not much different than some of these other douches, Dyke just had a liquidity problem and he was given the kiss of death by Cramer.
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:35AM
Fuck. lenny Dykstra. If you losers want to make some money buy AIG. I'm up over 100K since Friday in a massive short squeeze.
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:36AM
Not sure about "cognative" impairment but my chiro says you can get a crook-neck like that from shooting too much POV vid.
Posted by mrpink , Jul 13, 2009 11:36AM
LD The Lycan!
-mrp
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:38AM
#33
Respect
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:38AM
I wish he would eat twizzlers in the nude with MW.
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:38AM
@32 hell yes!
-uncle jim
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:39AM
@34 for the win......
~Jenna Jameson
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:40AM
@23 are you saying i'm not a reputable business man!?! I'm gonna have to make your face beat up my hand!
J. Dimon
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 11:41AM
I am grounding and pounding my Brazilian secretary in her ass right now.
LD
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 12:02PM
#41 so am I. fu karen
JJC
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 12:22PM
seriously, his hands, and the twizzlers for that matter, look fucking huge.
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 12:34PM
Cramer has got to go, guy is an absolute clown. I become more convinced by the day that he knows nothing about the markets or how to pick a winner
LD is a complete retard, anyone who gives this guy the time of day deserves to lose their coin
"I DONT MAKE MONEY I PRINT IT, YA HEARD??"
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 1:02PM
The Mets should sign this clown. They could string him up like a pinata and let Dominican orphans take a whack at him on Cinco de Mayo.
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 1:08PM
@45 considering he's taken enough whacks to the head already, I'm sure LD's in.
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 1:10PM
look at these fucking clowns. I said look at these fucking clowns!
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 1:10PM
who you callin a clown, shit for brains?
-jamie d
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 1:14PM
Cramer: You gotta be super smart to count cards buddy.
Dykstra: Oh really?
Cramer: It's not easy.
Dykstra: Okay well maybe we should tell that to rainman cause he practically bankrupted a casino and he was a re-tard.
Cramer: A what?
Dykstra: He was a re-tard.
Cramer: Retard.
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 1:14PM
@49 well done
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 1:16PM
49 ftw
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 1:25PM
49 wins.
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 1:28PM
@49 awesome. smirked for a minute straight.
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 1:55PM
49 wins, close the thread
Posted by EvilBuzzard , Jul 13, 2009 2:09PM
I'm still laughing at #10.
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 4:08PM
Yea, #10 definitely went under the radar.
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 7:33PM
LD, YOU ARE MY BITCH DOG. I BROUGHT YOU TO YOUR KNEES. YOU WILL NEVER, NEVER be respected in New York or Philly again....except to maybe the meth delericts YOU consort with! You are a persona non grata at Citifield. In fact, I hear they're removing your photo off the facade! Hell, O.J. Simpson's more welcome there than you!
Posted by guest , Jul 13, 2009 8:19PM
Lenny's comments remind me of former Illinois Gov Rod Blagoavich and we all know what happened to him.
Bend over and spread 'em, Lenny -- you're about to get screwed real good!