How badly did Jefferies want Ben Lorello? Apparently the former global head of UBS healthcare got a $50 million, 2 year guarantee to jump ship. No word on whether or not there was anything included in the contract re: taking over the investment bank, or teaching JEF management his patented program for dealing with the tardy asses of employees, though obviously that was a huge draw in landing B-Lo.
Archive for July 2009
Bank of America’s Brian Moynihan Is Said to Court Former Merrill Bankers (Bloomberg)
“We are going to be aggressive in the talent we attract and we feel very good about the people we’re attracting and retaining,” said Jessica Oppenheim, a Bank of America spokeswoman. She declined to elaborate vis-a-vis how far Moynihan’s willing to go but we’re to understand it’s a no holds barred situation. For those of you getting a call from Bri-Moy, make him dance.
JPMorgan Trading May Rescue Profit for Second Straight Quarter (Bloomberg)
Joyous news from the House of Dimon, which will probably report earnings of $1.59 billion.
Cuomo, Rattner Eyeing Settlement (NYP)
The Attorney General’s office is apparently not interested in pressing a criminal case against the former Car Czar, and has been applying pressure on SRat/Quadrangle to come to an understanding that will avoid civil charges having to be filed, and a live screening of Chooch in Bryant Park.
GM’s Wagoner Rides Off With $8.5 Million (NYP)
It’s not the $20 million package we were all hoping for but it’ll do. Rick will get $1.64 million annually for the next five years, as well as $74,030 a year for the rest of his life and all the Pontiacs he could ever desire.
Risks at Goldman Include an Outcry Over Pay (BV)
GTFO, really?
NY Trustee Sues Offshore Hedge Fund in Madoff Case (AP)
Apparently the Herald fund and HSBC ”knew or should have known that (Madoff’s business) was predicated on fraud” and now might have to pay $587 million for the slip-up.
Robert De Niro victim of New York art scam (Reuters)
Other victims of the $88 million scam include John McEnroe and the art buffs at Bank of America.
French Nortel workers secure talks after blow-up threat (Reuters)
“Unions have agreed to remove the gas cylinders placed around the site after their demand was met,” the local prefect’s chief of cabinet said.
$$$ No One At Goldman Sachs Celebrating The W Tonight [Cityfile]
$$$ The SEC to protect investors by…hiring employees? [The Deal]
$$$ How to Write An MBA Admissions Essay [BW]
$$$ How Bernie Could Potential Get Killed In The Big House [via]
Following up on yesterday’s call to fix the economy by prosecuting Lloyd Blankfein, Willard continues:
Yeah, when the tens of billions of dollars of state money that could have helped fix health care wasn’t enough, Lloyd Blankfein, the CEO of Goldman, just kept right on denying that he and his firms were insolvent because they’d gambled at casinos without bothering to make sure the house could actually pay off the bets being offered, and he went out and convinced Buffett and other investors that since the state was going to cover any losses that the firm might have at their own casino anyway, he might as well put in a little bit of his money to catch some upside.
Why doesn’t someone send someone to prison for this stuff? It’s clearly illegal, no?
Goldman Sachs vs America – heads I win, tails you lose [The Cody Word]
It looks like the longest running insider trading scheme may be in jeopardy. Now that government agencies are major stakeholders in a variety of companies and the tidal wave of regulation is getting closer to the shore, the time has finally come to consider a prohibition on lawmakers using non-public information (learned on-the-job) for investment decisions. Accumulating an impressive portfolio of battered banks and auto makers has led at least some lawmakers to question the ability of politicians to avoid doing something unethical.
Congress and the federal government are now so enmeshed in the operations of our financial markets that the potential for abuse by members of Congress, congressional staff and federal employees is staggering,” Rep. Louise Slaughter (D-N.Y.) said at a hearing of the oversight and investigations subcommittee of the House Committee on Financial Services.
No stranger to the appearance of impropriety themselves, SEC Inspector General David Kotz remarked
The SEC had essentially no compliance system in place to ensure that its own employees, with tremendous amounts of nonpublic information at their disposal, did not engage in insider trading themselves
A 2004 study revealed senators made approximately 25% more on investments than the average joe. Assuming the legislation passes and lawmakers have to take their trading ethics pledge, that number might get chopped down to 20%.
Congress Mulls Trading Curbs for Its Own [Washington Post]
Cannabis Science, a new company that is trying to develop a pot cough drop to treat hypertension, has fired its CEO. Obviously we’re throwing our support to Jimmy Cayne for the job, but on the off-chance he’s not feeling up to running a start-up, even with the perks that come with, one of you should apply.
Cannabis Science 8-K [PDF]
As mentioned a few mins ago, Charlie Gasparino tells us that Lloyd Blankfein described the CNBC on-air editor as a “thug” recently. It apparently happened at some sort of cocktail type party, at which LB was presumably drinking, and let’s be honest: the Goldman CEO could’ve said a lot worse. Not because it’s necessarily true that the Dealbreaker mascot is a “thug,” or a “jabroni” or an “intard” (we were making assumptions there about the other stuff LB might’ve called CG) but because Blanks probably doesn’t like some of the stuff Chazza has written about him and his bank. And, getting real for two, let’s think about the stuff some of you have probably said or thought about CG. Maybe even mention it below. Right about now “thug” sounds like a compliment, doesn’t it? But the point is, Charlie feels unjustly maligned. “I’m a sweetheart of a guy!” he told us in response to the diss, chalking it up to Goldman, like everyone else, being “obsessed” with him.
So, what we’re thinking, is that this should be settled, street style. It could be in a ring, which you wouldn’t have to ask the almost-Golden Gloves participant twice to get into (we could get Lloyd to do it under the guise of charity, and in an attempt to ingratiate Goldman to the people). It could be a 50-yard sprint. It could be a Top Chef-like cook off. It could be a shoot-out, with actual guns. We’re not set anything, and you probably have some ideas of your own that are welcome at this time. The point is, this needs to happen (you know CNBC would air it, and Gasa could probably make some calls and have it shot live from Vegas, what with his contacts).
Photo Credit: Gasparino being declared the victor of his last battle.
It turns out the little healthcare banking scuffle between UBS and Jefferies wasn’t the first time these two titans have clashed over some form of theft. UBS confirmed yesterday that it charged three former members of its algorithmic trading group with stealing 25,000 lines of source code and taking the trade secrets to Jefferies, a story first reported by Dealbreaker. The sticky-fingered trio are now integrated into Jefferies’ global quantitative strategies trading unit and, according to their lawyer, being tormented by their former employer for running away with code that they pinky swear isn’t being used.
UBS has twice pulled out of settlement talks and is hell bent on torturing my clients rather than finding out if the source code is being used.
Presumably UBS learned their lesson and gave Ben Lorello a full cavity search before letting him walk out the door.
UBS Charges 3 Ex-Employees With Code Theft [Securities Industry News]
Charlie Gasparino, Who Goldman Sachs Is ‘Obsessed’ With, Wants SAC Capital Turned Into A Bank Because Of GS’s Second Quarter Profits
By Bess Levin
Stick with him, the Italian Lassie’s making a point. It’s like this, see. The way Charlie figures, Goldman Sachs operates in practice, if not in name, like a hedge fund. And there’s this hedge fund up in Stamford called SAC, which Chaz has been following since it came up on his Google alert for ‘testes and tits.’ And so…if Goldman’s gonna be a hedge fund that calls itself a bank…SAC should have to do the same. Gaspo got the idea while he was writing his latest column for The Daily Beast, in which he expounds on Goldman Capital Management. It makes a little bit of sense if you think about it.
Anyway, we called Chazpo to hear more about the plan, which he’s yet to clear with Steve Cohen but will probably get the go-head for by the end of the week. Catching him on his way to lunch at San Pietro, we wondered if Charlie had taken into account that a public company might not be up to get down with employees being forced to wear dresses against their own will, which could be a dealbreaker for the Royal Bank of SAC. Had Charlie thought about that detail, we asked? Of course he had– he’s a professional after all. “If you’re a government regulated bank, I believe that they have to respect all walks of life, including the ones you just specified,” Chaz told us. While we had him on the phone, we decided to touch on a sore spot, which was only too palpable in today’s column. GS and CG. What’s up there? It seemed like there’s some tension, specifically with Goldman flack Lucas Van Praag, who you know Charlie has a history with.
“Listen,” Gasa told us. “I like Lucas Van Praag, but I don’t like him enough to talk to him ten times a day. He emailed me like five times yesterday, yelling at me, sayin’ I misrepresented GS. My thing is simply this: if Goldman wants to roll the dice, give up the bank charter. Also, Blankfein told a mutual friend that I’m a ‘thug.’ You believe that? I’m a sweetheart of a guy! They’re obsessed with me over there.”
Specifically whoever’s in charge of his file at the Federal Bureau of Prisons, perhaps? Take a gander at this:
As one of the math whizzes among us just pointed out, it looks like someone has decided that Ponz-Boy is getting out in 130 years, and not the 150 Judge Denny Chin sentenced him to. We’re pretty sure he does not have a chance for parole, and even if he did, wouldn’t we cross that bridge at a later date, rather than (very) prematurely assuming it’s gonna happen? We need a prison expert in the hizzous to tell us what the hell is going on here. Is this a typo? Did the clock start 20 years back on account of a decision by those who decide such things that living under Ruth’s freaky ass rules was probably as good as being locked up?
Ponz-boy has reportedly made it to Butner, safe and sound, though is said to be apparently in a bit of a mood, having spent the last half hour of the drive from Atlanta giving his handlers the silent treatment after finding out none of his guests will be able to visit wearing the uniforms he had specially made for them. A dozen bike shorts and tee’s emblazoned with a “Deez Nuts” logo in the Madoff Securities font are now worthless, thanks to the no spandex, no offensive language rules of the house. He’ll get over it once he finds out Ken Lewis is going to sneak in some Schnapps, but right now he’s not happy.
Please note that according to the Federal Bureau of Prisons, B-boy is still in Atlanta, which either means the employee in charge of updating the system is at lunch or someone’s made a run for it. Hopefully the latter, as we could use a good car chase.
