As you might’ve heard, Ruth Madoff has been forced to hand over the keys to her East 64th Street penthouse, home in Palm Beach and Montauk summer place, on account of the pads being bought with the ill-gotten gains of Ponzi Nation. But perhaps the Feds allowed the family one last rager before changing the locks? Or US Marshalls threw their own welcome to the neighborhood soiree? Or Bernie busted out for the weekend, having figured, what’s the worst they can do to me? From the mailbag:
Archive for July 2009
Meredith Whitney: “Goldman Has All The Benefits Of The Capital Markets In General Without The ‘Junk In The Trunk’ As I Like To Call It”
By Bess Levin
Also, in a later segment from this morning’s appearance, the Dollar Dom says she’s always been a bull, and Mr. Whitney (John “Bradshaw” Layfield) ran with the B’s today in Pamplona, which she was very nervous about, given that JBL is “pigeon-toed and not a fast runner.”
For Goldman, A Swift And Lofty Return To Profits (NYT)
And that makes some people angry! Like this guy: “They exist, and others don’t, and taxpayers made it possible,” said one industry consultant, who, like many people interviewed for this article, declined to be named for fear of jeopardizing business relationships.
Berkshire Hathaway Tones Down Risky Business (WSJ)
The reinsurance business has pulled back on catastrophic property damage. Unprotected sex with prostitutes still on the table, if the situation presents itself. You can’t WB to give everything up.
Bank of America Said to Balk at Paying Fee to U.S. for Backstop (Bloomberg)
“Regulators contend Bank of America owes at least part of a $4 billion fee it agreed to pay in January — even without a completed legal document — because the company benefited from implied U.S. backing on about $118 billion of Merrill Lynch assets, such as mortgage-backed bonds, people familiar with the matter said. The Charlotte, North Carolina-based bank says it owes the Treasury nothing.” Would BAC be this brazen if Paulson were still running the show? Don’t get us wrong, we like this no shit/prisoners attitude but we’re not sure they’d pull it in the face of the Hammer.
UBS, US Talk On Tax Case (WSJ)
Heads up to anyone who the Swiss helped not pay taxes:names may be named
Mayor Tightens Belt, Too, Amid Losses In Market (NYT)
Bloomberg’s just like the rest of us. He lost at least ten million on investments over the last year and now sacrifices have to be made. The Florida vacation house is getting rented out and he’s cut back on housekeepers.
Wells Fargo Sues Itself (FBN)
“You can’t sue yourself,” McKillop said. “It’s just so ridiculous. .. It’s a waste of paper. It’s a bastardization of the legal process.”
Goldman Upped To ‘Buy’ By Meredith Whitney (MarketWatch)
The Dollar Dom thinks it’s “a bull stock for a bear market.”
Earlier this afternoon on a Closing Bell segment, Charlie Gasparino reported that UBS is considering, among others, Sallie Krawcheck, Bob McCann, and James Gorman for head of US Wealth Management. He did the hit over the phone, since, as you all know, the big man’s been in Vegas for the better part of a week. At one point, Charlie seemed flummoxed and we wondered if we had another “what you got” situation on our hands. So, we placed a call to CG, who cleared the air. Let’s just say there’s a young male in the desert who should strongly consider watching his back.
His voice shaking and clearly shook up, Chaz told us that prior to the segment, he’d just gotten back from a six mile run, and “wanted to take a whirlpool.” So he went on down to the spa area at the Bellagio, where he’s staying, and tucked in for a soak. Ten minutes into the R&R sesh, Gaspo gets a tip about UBS, and calls into CNBC to let them know. Everything’s going fine, he’s reporting his shit, when all of a sudden “a towel boy comes out of nowhere and starts screaming at me.” What was he saying, we asked Chazpo. “Sir, there are no phones allowed here. Get off the phone immediately, sir!” the boy screamed at CG. Startled, Charlie made a move to get out the tub, but apparently wasn’t moving fast enough. “All of a sudden, this kid’s on my ass,” he told us. “This fuckin’ guy chases me out, into the lobby– I barely had time to put my robe on!” It was essentially a really traumatizing experience. CG’s okay now, but we’d suggest towel boy do himself a favor and get out of town.
The new GM is set to change it ways and get it off on the right foot by focusing some of its efforts on the cash rich empire known as California. GM has partnered with eBay to allow Californians to bid for new cars online and forgo the hassle of heading to the dealership and test driving a car before purchasing it. But CEO Fritz Henderson knows this is a bit of a long shot and is going to wait and see what happens before going full-throttle with this creative nugget.
“Experiments are experiments … You don’t roll them out until you figure out if they work. We are excited about it, but I wouldn’t commit to rolling it out more broadly until we find out if it’s successful.”
A couple tweaks to Paypal to process IOUs and GM will be right back on its normal course.
GM tests new sales pitch on eBay [Reuters]
Just like Uncle Vikula promised, base pay has been raised at Citi. First and second year analysts were just informed that they’re getting jacked up to 70k and 80k, respectively. So, if those bonus were to be believed, junior rainmakers at the premier government-owned bank on the Street are pulling between $110,000-$140,000 this year.
Earlier: Bonus Watch ’09: Citi
Comp Watch ’09: Citi And BoA Probably Base Raising Pay
Elizabeth Warren: These Citi Guys Just Don’t Get It
As the debate heats up about whether or not the economy will need a second stimulus package, millions of dollars from the current package are flying out the door to advertise where the money from the first stimulus is going. In a follow up effort to shelling out $500-$1200 for “Putting America to Work” and “”Project Funded by the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act” road signs for each new turtle crossing, the White House plans to spend up to $18 million over the next 5 years on the Recovery.gov website. Only DC could construct a feedback loop in which millions are needed to handle the technological intricacies involved in redirecting people back to the home page when they click on ‘See Where Your Money Is Going’.
Recovery.Gov: Obama Team Redesigns Stimulus Site — for $9.5M [ABC News]
As you’re aware, Sony executives canceled Michael Lewis’s baseball flick last month, and now the script is getting a re-write by Aaron Sorkin.* It still remains to be seen if this thing’s gonna get done, though, which is why we’re stepping up to the plate and getting down on our knees to practically beg some hedge fund or otherwise deeply pocketed chump to get behind the film. Why? Because it features a cameo by a certain down on his luck friend of Dealbreaker, who could really use the pick me up (and practice in front of the camera, in preparation for the low budget porn he’s probably going to have to start taking part in to make ends meet).
Excerpts From The Scrapped Moneyball Script [Deadspin]
*A preemptive ‘fuck you’ to Sorkin if you even entertain the idea of cutting LD’s scene.
Based on recent events coming out of the G8 meeting, you’d think the Girls Gone Wild bus had pulled into L’Aquila, Italy. In addition to Obama and Sarkozy comparing notes on some teenage Brazilian tail, Russian President Dmitry Medvedev seemed equally preoccupied when he upped the ante on calling for a new global super currency by reaching into his pocket and producing a sample coin. With the words “Here it is. You can see it and touch it”, Medvedev whipped out his specimen tattoed with the words “Unity In Diversity” and encouraged reporters to indulge themselves.
The union read news reports about AIG asking comp cop Kenneth Feinberg permission to pay a couple hundy million in bonuses this morning and after snorting to itself and remarking “who do these guys fuckin’ think they are” to no one in particular, sat down to compose the following (John McEnroe-inspired) response. To be fair, SEIU acknowledges that it was the crooks at Citi that originally set them off earlier this week but no matter: you people are unbelievable. Anyone else want to step into the line of fire and announce it’s going to be paying employees a kajillion dollars while taxpayers scrape by on Food Stamps? Bank of America? Anyone?
SEIU ON AIG BONUS REQUESTS: YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING US.
SEIU Demands AIG Halt Million-Dollar Bonuses for Top Execs
Stern: AIG and U.S. Chamber Just Don’t Get It.
Washington, DC–Today, the Service Employees International Union (SEIU), who staged nationwide protests over AIG bonuses in March, demanded that AIG halt the millions in bonuses they are seeking to give top executives. Additionally, SEIU took aim at the U.S. Chamber of Commerce, who has consistently defended the bonus pay-outs.
“Even after snagging billions in bailout money, AIG still has its hand out to struggling taxpayers, and the U.S. Chamber is right beside them rattling the can,” said Andy Stern, SEIU International President. “The greedy CEOs who tanked our economy don’t need another million-dollar bonus, but working families do need an economy that works for everyone. AIG needs to halt its insane request to reward themselves once more, and the US Chamber needs to give up its role as chief defender of the broken system.”
A lawyer for Sir Allen Stanford has appealed a judge’s decision to keep his client in the big house pending trial. Why? ‘Cause Stanfords weren’t meant to be cooped up behind bars like criminals! They need the space to stretch their shit out, drop weights for attention, and run free! But not run, like, in the flight risk sense. No, that would never happen, because Big Al’s innocent. Got nothing to run from and suggestions to the contrary will result in a punch to the mouth. Getting real for two, attorney Dick DeGuerin realizes there’s not a chance in hell that Stanford will get to go home ahead of his court date, but if he could be place in a more comfortable prison, where the duo could plan what’s sure to be an air-tight defense (this is a case of regulators just being jealous they weren’t the 405th wealthiest person in the world) without prying eyes looking over their shoulders, that’d be top notch.
