It turns out JPM is not the only firm with interns on the verge of collapse. We are told a few weeks ago a GS IBD intern got a spider bite and had to go to the hospital. After a short hospital stay, she checked herself out against doctors orders and returned to work. For the next few days, she made regular trips to the nurse’s offce for additional shots. However, one day while working on a deadline, she kept pushing off her trip downstairs. Her breathing became labored to the point where she was struggling to inhale, so she ran to the bathroom, stuck herself with the EpiPen, then went back to her cubicle and finished up the model before the deadline.
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- Use the Bloomberg command
NH BLG_DEALBREAKER <GO>
to access Dealbreaker
Erroneous! Erroneous on both counts!
Jefferies Intern
tired of all the GS-related posts.
That girl is in need of my polish sausage
Where do all the PSD’s go now that Bear is gone?
I am in the mood to munch some carpet.
I’m so jealous of Greg’s Rolodex of intern and 1st year level contacts.
DB is cesspool full of rabid commenter’s
just sayin’
The best part is that she’s just another disposable intern.
Goldman by day – protector of New York City as SpiderChick at night.
She is so hot in her latex outfit…
@7 full of rabid commenter’s… brilliant commentary?
plural v. possessive is hard.
6 wins the week.
Between this and EP’s 20-page Randroid crapola… uuugghhh.
Really? Why is this being posted. Who cares about some 20 year old girl who got a spider-bite. I hope this is some attempt at a weird sort of humor and not you thinking this is a story that deserves attention by anyone other than 2 or 3 people who might know this girl and think this is mildly interesting.
I’ll give her a shot in the arse!
- CS Intern
If you’re going to post some boring crap about an intern with a spider bite – include a sexy spider girl pic – something, anything.
12,
See: “Wall Street Gossip.”
This would never happen in Houston.
@6 Has the right idea.
I told that dumb b1tch not to swallow!
Twas me that bit her!!!
MackeKneale
and she actually came out of the bathroom to describe the entire episode to you??? how frikkin lame can you guys get!
a question: this is a blog about the wall street; do the people who write it have any exposure to working on the street or are they just a bunch of geeky-looser-o-maniacs?
choose life
Current Odds:
Asian pays – even money
Indian pays – 2/1
Eastern European pays – 5/1
Canadian pays – 10/1
American pays – 15/1
Western European pays – 20/1
Australian pays – 100/1
Mexican pays 1,000,000/1
Liter of cola.
@15 – this isn’t gossip. Gossip is if she was caught in a bush in central park banging Gasbags and got a spider bite. This is just boring stuff that happens to everyone everyday. There’s a difference.
Wow. You know it’s shaping up to be a slow day at DealBreaker when they’re reaching for the dick jousting posts (Goldman vs. JPM) before noon…and even those can’t break thirty posts.
These type of interbank competition posts have traditionally been good for a couple hundred comments. Maybe people are wising up?
@22, chang is that you??
@6 FTW!
No one respects playing hurt anymore
-Melvin Mora
Too long; didn’t read.
I have no problem with this gossip post.
- Chris Theoharis
@HH – This will be our first (and only?) 30 of the day.
Next Greg Michaels Article: Who Would Win in a Fight? Ken Lewis’ Dad or Vikram Pandit’s?
@25, Headless, is that you?
Skeet Skeet Skeet
Did anybody see The Green Man dancing behind Tiger Woods this weekend?
WILDCARD, bitches!
@HH, tax chick – no Bess = no fun.
Who the fuck cares that a GS intern had a spider bite and had to go to hosiptal for it.
Glondor, king of squisha squisha?
Why not just sleep with her boss(es)? Killing yourself to make money is not a great idea.
How are Asians so smart?
Quiz Time:
Question 1
This GS intern:
A) Will get a fulltime offer
B) Will get the next 3 days off for her courageous
C) Will receive a hug from Lloyd Blankfein
D) Will be moved from GS’s IBD to Wealth Management
Correct Answer – C
Question 2
This GS intern:
A) Was bit by a spider
B) Actually got a bee sting but made up the spider story to sound more legit
C) Actually has an undisclosed heart-condition
D) Actually had a herpes outbreak from being taken advantage of by GS Team Law her first week on the job
Correct Answer – D
Looks like we’re gonna hafta take matters into our own hands, anyone wanna step up to the plate?
We wasted a goddamn EpiPen on a fucking intern?!
Who the hell is running things while I’m on sabbatical, fer chrissakes?
Lloyd
I heard about a lot of off-hours MD’s only visits to the 10th floor jersey office ladies’ rooms to seal the fate of these bitten souls!!!
@22: back to diversity training, bro
6 knows what`s up
i’ve seen more than enough interns with little spider bites.
i keep telling my HR guy to upgrade to full C’s. maybe even throw some D’s on it.
@ 48
I was wating for someone to take it there. Well-played.
@49
Ditto.
@48 A late contribution but nicely done!
The culture of C’s and D’s in the IB’s have totally F’d the fates of 1000′s of Americans!
It could be worth a blog joke for a few; but ask the NV lad who just lost his farm and has kids off for school/college dependent on him.
What a shame ….
The culture of C’s and D’s in the IB’s has totally F’d the fates of 1000′s of Americans!
It could be worth a blog joke for a few; but ask the NV lad who just lost his farm and has kids off for school/college dependent on him.
What a shame ….
@52/53 WTF?
When I think of Nevada, I do not think of farmers, but rather C’s and D’s.
@54 my conscience woke up after my first 1M post-tax and hasn’t passed out ever since.
@55 there is a lot that goes into making & maintaining those C’s and D’s that you are refering to; statistically speaking -farm income is a major driver.
CHUNG is working at a hedge fund with my friend – he’s actually a pretty cool guy.
I think this is fake. How could she get a spider bite? Presumably that means she was somewhere other than the office, a Lincoln Towncar, or her apartment, and we know that no Goldman employees, let alone interns, go anywhere else.
Spider Bite? Is that what that little skank is telling people?
This is def herpes. Now which MD gave it to her?
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