You guys, I can't even with this woman. The book's out tomorrow, so just accept that we're going to be relentlessly pounded with anecdotes like the following for at least another 24-72 hours, culminating with a no-holds barred interview/demo on CNBC conducted by Mark Haines and whichever random tourists outside the stock exchange are willing.
[Sheryl Weinstein writes that] Madoff had a penis so small that "it would fit easily inside the opening of a single-serving honey jar" that sits on a hotel room service breakfast tray.
PW Review: 'Madoff's Other Secret: Love, Money, Bernie, and Me' [PW]
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 5:41PM
i'm a grow-er not a show-er
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 5:43PM
apparently the honey jar climaxed
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 5:44PM
His balls, however, would need a platter commensurate with a Continental breakfast.
Posted by wcburrs87 , Aug 24, 2009 5:48PM
That's disgusting, and a terrible waste of honey.
-WTP
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 5:50PM
"relentlessly pounded" Oh, mama.
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 5:50PM
Narrator: Clean food, please.
Waiter: In that case, sir, may I advise against the lady eating single-serving honey?
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 5:50PM
"relentlessly pounded" Oh, mama.
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 5:51PM
just as long as we don't have to hear about "that time Berns and I were playing pool and I brought him to climax inside a worn-down piece of chalk"
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 5:51PM
she is a complete and total lunactic. i'm kind of turned on.
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 5:52PM
do you think she ever tested that theory?
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 5:53PM
Is this some sort of a composite image consisting of two unrelated halves?
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 5:54PM
Relentlessly he pounded the submit button again and again.
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 5:56PM
Penis, all the time PENIS
Posted by Anal_yst , Aug 24, 2009 5:58PM
She didn't mention this is all relative to the size of her massive, sleeve-of-wizard penis fly trap...
Posted by Riskybusiness , Aug 24, 2009 6:02PM
When he asked to see her "honey pot" I bet he was surprised when she ordered it from room service.
Posted by LA Alum , Aug 24, 2009 6:05PM
Anal,
Very well done/said. Someone's gotta stick up for Berns.
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 6:09PM
Risky, that was very clever.
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 6:24PM
how's that working out for you, anyway?
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 6:25PM
@18 how's what working out for who?
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 6:39PM
I always do that when I order room service. Whats the big deal?
Jefferies Baller
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 6:43PM
I bet it easily fit up her nostril, too.
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 6:56PM
i'm jealous. if i could stick my erection in a honey pot that size i could keep it in my trousers all day and no one would be the wiser.
http://www.break.com/index/arnold_schwarzenegger_cuming.html
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 6:59PM
oops. i meant
""bernie was so small that after he skullfucked me it was like pulling out a botfly"
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 7:12PM
That's it, you guys with your "quotes" earlier kept me from screaming. Thank you.
Now it might be time to go slam this whore on Amazon. I hope her sales rank never gets lower than six digits and the book quickly ends up in the remainder bin unsold.
She has no soul, kinda like her Winky-Dink supposed lover.
Bess, I beg you, no more pictures, no more posts, no more attention paid to these sqeezy ho.
The only way I want to read another post about this See U Next Tuesday is if 135 guys come forward to say she had sex with them too and with at least 10 of them at once.
Please, she's supposedly a Wharton MBA and a former Hadassah CFO, she doesn't know how to diversify?
-Disgusted female
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 7:21PM
why did bernie neglect the ketchup and mustard bottles?
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 7:22PM
"You guys, I can't even (blank) with this woman."
Bess, please clarify.
1) deal
2) believe I share a religious and ethnic heritage
3) live on the same planet
4) believe any dude would shack up more than once
5) comprehend that I share a gender
6) ?
Ah, fuck it, there are far wittier and more clever DB commenters than I'll ever be, I hope one of them takes a stab at filling in that vast echoing blank.
-24
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 7:40PM
@19-
"Bernie had the most interesting single-serving cock i've ever seen...you see, he could fit the head of his penis inside a single-serving jar of honey and--"
"oh, i get it. it's very clever...how's that working out for you, anyway?"
admittedly this wasn't precisely the conversation 15 and 17 were having, but i'm sure you'll be able to spot the parallels.
-18
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 8:11PM
bess, have you ever banged a non-jew? if so please weigh in re: jew v gentile junk.
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 8:21PM
@28 that was so inappropriate and offensive.
-18
Posted by guest , Aug 24, 2009 9:23PM
@6 FTW.
This is one fucking crazy bitch!
Posted by guest , Aug 25, 2009 12:55AM
@18/27/29 - why don't you sit the next couple plays out, champ?
Posted by guest , Aug 25, 2009 2:15AM
the honey jar is coming out with a tell all that says bernie was HEUUGE.
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Posted by guest , Aug 25, 2009 6:05AM
Heigh Mann would not fit into a single-serving honey jar.
Posted by Perkins Maxwell , Aug 25, 2009 8:21AM
@Anal_yst: i have you to thank for the coffee I'm mopping up off my laptop keyboard.
Posted by guest , Aug 25, 2009 8:35AM
could we see a picture of said jar?
Posted by guest , Aug 25, 2009 8:52AM
18/27 here. for the record, 29 was not me.
Posted by Anal_yst , Aug 25, 2009 9:11AM
@ Perkins
You're welcum
Posted by guest , Aug 25, 2009 9:20AM
http://static1.px.yelp.com/bphoto/mhCMsaj2RcBBGmK1foENVA/l
Posted by Tapecracker , Aug 25, 2009 9:25AM
Mine fits snugly into a room service ketchup bottle..
Posted by guest , Aug 25, 2009 11:24AM
can i handbridge them funbags? then leave her with a pearl necklace with matching earrings and nose studs
Posted by guest , Aug 25, 2009 11:54AM
Is she referring to the diameter or depth of the honey jar ? In the flacid or turgid state?
Posted by guest , Aug 25, 2009 11:54AM
Is she referring to the diameter or depth of the honey jar ? In the flacid or turgid state?
Posted by guest , Aug 25, 2009 11:55AM
Is she referring to the diameter or depth of the honey jar ? In the flacid or turgid state?
Posted by Shakes23 , Aug 25, 2009 12:14PM
WTF is wrong with her eye? Did she get Bernie's piece stuck in it?