• 03 Aug 2009 at 1:29 PM

Relax, Germany Is Going To Eliminate Unemployment

By Equity Private

stei.jpgIn what has to be one of the most… creative campaign promises in quite a while, Germany’s Foreign Minister Frank-Walter Steinmeier unveils the “Deutschland Plan,” wherein he will eliminate unemployment by 2020. True, there are no specific term-limits attached to the position of Chancellor in Germany, but planning out to 2020 is an awfully optimistic reach.
Green jobs and health care are slated to create 4 million new jobs under the plan. Sound familiar?
Steinmeier ‘Deutschland Plan’ Pledges Full Employment [Bloomberg]

Comments (33)

  1. 1
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 1:32 PM

    What’s the matter, old man? We have ways of making you work.
    Deutschland, Deutschland Uber Alles!

  2. 2
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 1:34 PM

    I don’t like German initiatives with the words “Plan” or “solution” in them. Just sayin’

  3. 3
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 1:36 PM

    Zu lange; nicht lesen.

  4. 4
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 1:37 PM

    Whatever you do, don’t mention the war! I did once, but I think I got away with it.

  5. 5
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 1:37 PM

    I still want the answer to the final solution. What is it? Tell me!!!!
    chocolate banana

  6. 6
    Posted by HeadlessHorseman | August 3, 2009 at 1:39 PM

    @2 Well done.
    EP – Nice tags.

  7. 7
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 1:43 PM

    Lassen Sie mich Ihnen ein wenig etwas über die Liebe erzählen, weil ich Sie liebe. Alle von Ihnen.
    January 1933
    6 million
    January 1934
    3.3 million
    January 1935
    2.9 million
    January 1936
    2.5 million
    January 1937
    1.8 million
    January 1938
    1.0 million
    January 1939
    302,000

  8. 8
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 1:44 PM

    also they will put a lot of men to work at the Million Man Bukkake

  9. 9
    Posted by Equity Private | August 3, 2009 at 1:46 PM

    If anyone can do it, it’s the Germans. They almost had unemployment licked once before as #7 points out. (Hint: You can cut at the problem from the supply and the demand side).

  10. 10
    Posted by Anal_yst | August 3, 2009 at 1:47 PM

    EP, where shall we send tips since the traditional DB tipline has an out of office message?

  11. 11
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 1:49 PM

    john malkovich as naked, evil shorter?

  12. 12
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 1:54 PM

    id like to see an ElimiDate with Herr Steinmeier there.

  13. 13
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 2:00 PM

    What a bunch of goddamn malarkey. Not even the interns can get things right anymore.
    http://nymag.com/daily/intel/2009/08/dude_in_underpants_passed_out.html

  14. 14
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 2:02 PM

    die Endlösung zur Arbeitslosigkeitsfrage

  15. 15
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 2:05 PM

    wow. e burnett looks great today.

  16. 16
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 2:11 PM

    eQUITY pRIVATE? wHAT oTHER pRIVATES? aNY pRIVATES bETWEEN tHE lEGS?

  17. 17
    Posted by american bandersnatch | August 3, 2009 at 2:12 PM

    @5 – The final solution was the answer. Just as in Jeopardy, the question is of critical importance.

  18. 18
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 2:12 PM

    Germany has never been able to eliminate anything.

  19. 19
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 2:13 PM

    Well the European Fecal Standards and Measurements is hiring, thats a start

  20. 20
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 2:21 PM

    Why do Germans enjoy shitting on each other so much?

  21. 21
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 2:36 PM

    Work makes you free.

  22. 22
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 2:38 PM

    Arbeit Macht Frei.

  23. 23
    Posted by NAS Keflavik boi | August 3, 2009 at 2:50 PM

    hell they dould do this overnight just by kicking out half the Turks… be a little tougher getting a doner kebab on the KuDamm, but that’s life…

  24. 24
    Posted by american bandersnatch | August 3, 2009 at 2:52 PM

    @23 – Kebabnacht?

  25. 25
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 2:59 PM

    Du!
    Du hast!
    Du hast micht!

  26. 26
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 3:03 PM

    Not sure that any German plan with ‘eliminate’ in it is kosher.

  27. 27
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 3:05 PM

    Suck my ass and eat my Vaseline, bitches!
    Steph “Starbury” Marbury

  28. 28
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 3:27 PM

    Schöne Grüße an die Arbeiterklasse!
    Warum erlässt man nicht einfach ein Gesetz gegen Arbeitslosigkeit?

  29. 29
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 3:31 PM

    Unemployment –> Reich Employment –> :(

  30. 30
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 3:42 PM

    …and free beer for everyone!

  31. 31
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 3:44 PM

    Mein Fuhrer, I can walk!

  32. 32
    Posted by guest | August 3, 2009 at 4:49 PM

    Arbeit macht frei.

  33. 33
    Posted by amsat | August 3, 2009 at 4:58 PM

    All I can say is they need to tell us what’s their really plan because that’s our rights..
    Todd DiRoberto
    http://www.campaignmoney.com/political/contributions/todd-diroberto.asp?cycle=08

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