• 27 Aug 2009 at 10:46 AM

Sir Allen Is Down

By

Allen Stanford.jpegWhether it was simply displaying the classic signs of an innocent man or merely a way to get some prolonged time in an air-conditioned room, Sir Allen is now on injured reserve. Apparently the opportunity to advance his ‘it wasn’t a Ponzi’ scheme campaign this morning was a bit too much for Stanford as he was brought to the hospital instead of the courthouse after his pulse topped out around 300 beats per minute. Somewhere in Butner, NC King Ponz is laughing out loud at just how much AS has to learn about this game.
Stanford Taken to Hospital After Pulse Rate Hits 300 [Bloomberg]

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    Comments (13)

    1. 1
      Posted by guest | August 27, 2009 at 10:58 AM

      300 beats per minute is the new killing it
      first?

    2. 2
      Posted by guest | August 27, 2009 at 10:59 AM

      300 bpm – he should be dead

    3. 3
      Posted by guest | August 27, 2009 at 11:01 AM

      300 beats per minute is nuthin’. I don’t even start to break a fuckin’ sweat until I’m up to about 500bpm. BTW, I got really pumped this morning.
      -The ragin’ bull of CNBC

    4. 4
      Posted by guest | August 27, 2009 at 11:03 AM

      Bernie’s heart rate would get that high when he tried to open the jewel case of a”Best of Barry White” CD that room service brought us on some occasions.
      ~Sheryl

    5. 5
      Posted by guest | August 27, 2009 at 11:13 AM

      Billy Madison: I swear to God I’m sick. I can’t go to school.
      Juanita: If you’re gonna stay home today, you can help me shave my armpits.
      Billy Madison: Oh my God. I’ll go to school.

    6. 6
      Posted by Le Guest | August 27, 2009 at 11:21 AM

      300 bpm? Easily achieved on the roof of 85 broad, while working for the weekend.
      -Rod Stuart

    7. 7
      Posted by turd_ferguson | August 27, 2009 at 11:21 AM

      Is the 300 bps coke induced?
      Plus too knightly, not enough titty.

    8. 8
      Posted by guest | August 27, 2009 at 11:28 AM

      @7 – Jesus – you’d have to consume a whole vending machine and half a Peruvian Laser Turkey to get that kind of high!

    9. 9
      Posted by weinberg or stein or whatever that bitches name is | August 27, 2009 at 11:59 AM

      I’d like to get pounded in wizard sleeve size vag at 300 BPM…

    10. 10
      Posted by guest | August 27, 2009 at 1:16 PM

      300 bpm? What pussy I used to get 5 handle on regular basis and then hit the martinis to come down.
      Larry Kudlow

    11. 11
      Posted by guest | August 27, 2009 at 3:13 PM

      I knew I was overdoing it when I tried to break the Montgomery County Central Jail’s record of 12 salads tossed in 45 minutes.
      Sir Allen

    12. 12
      Posted by Screwtape | August 27, 2009 at 9:51 PM

      Sir Allen, please allow me to introduce myself…

    13. 13
      Posted by guest | August 27, 2009 at 11:51 PM

      botched poisoning. rookies.

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