Charlie Gasparino went on record to predict that the President’s speech yesterday wasn’t going to live up the Gasparino Standard and CG is pleased to report that Charlie Gasparino was right. The whole thing was just a bunch of words that had no meaning behind them, that didn’t really tell us anything (where were the deep dark secrets about what’s really going on between Tim Geithner and Larry Summers? The shout out to a certain on-air CNBC editor? The mention of his upcoming book, The Sell-Out?). But Gaspo’s biggest problem with the whole thing? It lacked balls. Whereas BHO should’ve said “If you dare to take on the sort of reckless risk that got us into this mess, I know a guy who will break your fuckin’ knee-caps if you’re lucky,” the President practically, in CG’s mind, invited all the financiers assembled to go hog wild and promised to be there in a French Maid’s costume and a mop to clean up their messes yet again. When Barack is ready to strap on a pair, he should give Chaz a call.
One of the ironies of President Obama’s long and dreadfully boring speech about the financial crisis is just how much he under-delivered[...]
If you read between the lines, what the president actually said was that Goldman Sachs, Morgan Stanley and every other major financial institution can take all the risk they want, under the watchful eye of the various monitors he’s beginning to devise without consequence for their wrong-way bets.
What that peril is, the president didn’t say. But what he did say, loud and clear in my opinion, is that Wall Street’s free lunch is bigger and better than ever, particularly when he remarked, “that instead of learning the lessons of Lehman and the crisis from which we are still recovering,” some on Wall Street “are choosing to ignore them.” He then went on to discuss how the government will regulate the miscreants with “strong rules of the road.”
Scary stuff? I’m sure the traders at Goldman who just cranked $3 billion in profits trading bonds as if the financial crisis never happened are quaking in their shoes.
Scary Stuff? Not. The president wimps out, and Wall Street rejoices. [Forbes]
Gaspo is CNBC’s version of Extra’s Jerry Penacoli.
this fuckin jabroni will never quit. god love him.
We hope Gasparino will write a book about the crash one day soon.
~Association of Former Lehman Quants
retard
charlie gasparino will says whatever charlie gasparino wants to fucking say. charlie gasparino aint scared of no fucking secret service.
-cg
Punish me. It hurts so good.
“…what’s left of Wall Street will be obliterated…”
For some reason when I picture CG saying this word I see him smashing a fist into his other palm, and then cracking his neck with a minor twist of his head while simultaneously bursting out of his tight sleeveless shirt due to his muscular physique.
@7 you have a peep hole in my bedroom or sumthin?
-cg
Maybe Obama didn’t return Chaz’ calls promptly enough, so Chaz wrote this hard-hitting critique of Obama Speech Number 487.
“The only way to bag a classy lady is to give her two tickets to the gun show…and see if she likes the goods”
@9 probably. you know what they say about a gasparino scorned.
me. dis obama guy. in the ring. tonight.
-cg
You have great skin, CG. NOW PUT THE DAMN LOTION IN THE BASKET!
- BB
Hey yous guys pickin on me like I stupid or sometin. Well yous dopes no notin about notin. I’m da smartest dude at da CNBC. I sit on da can at elaine’s every night listin to guys talkin while dey pee. Da hardest workin guy on da tube get da scoops.
The Gasbag is little more than a loud mouth punk who knows enough about finance to barely balance a check book. Has anyone every checked his academic record? Straight C’s at Pace???? Most likely.
The Gasbag is little more than a loud mouth punk who knows enough about finance to barely balance a check book. Has anyone every checked his academic record? Straight C’s at Pace???? Most likely.
@16/15-
Kiss my hairy ass, you fuckin’ busone.
-CG
(busone m. (vulgar) passive male homosexual. )
Gasparino-Macke ’12
I wish Charlie would make up his mind already. He’s like a dinghy at anchor. Every 12 hours he’s pointing in the opposite direction.
@6 – outstanding!
Gasbagool needs to merge with Volker.
Gasparino’s legs need to merge with a Thighmaster in order to survive.
he looks so regal in that pic
This Saturday, Charlie Gasparino book signing, McFaddens, 1:00 PM. Free Cannoli for first 69 guests.
@24
And by “free” I mean they’re free to buy me a cannoli.
-CG
Um I didn’t see too many “financiers” assembled there, mostly the same looking crowd you see at any other Obama rally, i.e. a metric f*ckton of people you otherwise wouldn’t see in FiDi.
@anal_yst how about dick parsons, pete peterson, dan loeb, gary cohn, jim chanos?
@ Analyst
So to summarize: A weaksauce speech, weaksauce crowd, mocked by CG, and told by JC to sound more optimistic.
Sounds like Obama is getting closer and closer to having a big “FAIL” stamped on his forehead. I’m sure G-Dub can tell him all about how that feels.
“I’m really happy for you Chuck, and I’m gonna let you finish, but Obama had one of the best speeches of all time, one of the BEST SPEECHES OF ALL TIME!!!”
@29 well played.
@27
5-10 figurehead financiers in attendance does not a crowd make. Trust me, there were alot of non-finance people down there, it wasn’t pretty.
@32/Anal-yst:
I saw that Bloomberg, the odious Christina Romer, Barney Fwank, and a few other undesirables were in the crowd. Christina was sitting there mouth agape, once again, in awe of Obama. But Paul Volcker looked like he had fallen asleep in the photo I saw.
The Jambroni Pony was right about this one….
You idiots don’t realize Obama’s been keeping your paychecks coming. Without Bernanke and the Treasury, the system would have collapsed (and may still). You so-called capitalists are sucking at the govt teat thanks to Obama. Who’d be treating your s**t industry better than he has? Now stop your effing whining.
@ Acorner/33-
I’m interested in establishing a high class whore house in Queens, but cannot obtain cost effective financing. Could you kindly offer suggestions for government financing of my venture, and help me fill out the forms?
@34 – I’m sure you can find enough scratch in your taxpayer financed bonus check to pay for what you can’t get for free. Enjoy the rest of your taxpayer financed week.
@35/Acorner:
Thank you for your genorosity. Next week, I am jetting off to Tahiti to go to a conference on credit default swaps, and I will learn how to leverage a small sum into a god-damned fortune, with no risk at all to anyone but the taxpayers. Rahm Emmanuel has asked me to take notes. (He can’t, because one of his fingers was hacked off in an unfortunate accident when he was a child).
33/35, fail.
@33/36/37 – you s**theads are so easy – just pull the strings and watch you dance.
@38, Generous soul that I am, I credit you with the intelligence to recognize that 33/35′s comments are doctrinaire, ill-informed, poorly reasoned and not remotely entertaining.
Big fail around here.
-37