First off, let us just state for the record that we don’t think Big Daddy Cayne should have to provide a reason for his on and off the job habit of getting stoned. And we’re actually pretty disappointed he felt the need to do so, especially now, when the horse has already left this particular trailer park of hemp. You’ve already been caught, you’ve already been fired, you’ve already spoken about your drug problems to the press, and what’s more, you’re old as fuck and could simply tell people you got addicted before this shit was illegal, and didn’t know when exactly it crossed the line over from just being frowned upon. Also, drugs are kind of the only thing you have left. Now you’re going to turn your back on them? Not cool. So, yes, the sad news is that Charlie Gasparino reports Jimmy Cayne is now pushing the story that “his past pot smoking wasn’t simply to get high, but to alleviate a serious medical condition.” Of course, he hasn’t yet decided what that medical condition should be (what would elicit the most sympathy? What would be believable? What has the side effect of making your dick grow like 16 inches?) but give him time to come up with something. The good news is that Gasparino promises we’ll get more details on JC’s drug usage in his forthcoming book, The Sellout, several chapters of which are devoted to abusing cough syrup with Wall Street CEOs and on his own (“It all started one afternoon in the backseat of a Buick idling in Rego Park”).
Jimmy Cayne: I Had A Good Reason For Smoking Dope, The Particulars Of Which Escape Me At The Moment
By Bess LevinComments (16)
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traitor
Say glaucoma, you asshole. For you and me.
Gasparino is doing his SW impersonation with this constant hawking of his new trash book.
I hope Sheryl’s book sells more copies.
ball cancer. but the kind of ball cancer that makes your nuts HUGE.
i would also like to know what medical condition makes your dick grow like 16 inches.
My patient, James Cayne, suffers from tetrahydrocannabinol-anemia.
Dr Leo Spaceman
@5 you wish.
@5…why would anyone want a dick that small?
~Dick F.
He also has competitive bridge left. I hear that’s an awesome game to play high. Gates and Buffet should try it.
@9 he’s actually not that great at bridge, whereas he’s kick ass at getting high.
It’s just a bunch of lies they tell about marijuana causing memory loss. It’s all BS. Why they go to such lengths to spread that lie is….er……uh…..huh? Lost my train of thought….
Confucious say: “Man who stand on toilet high on pot. “
It was Johnny Hopkins, Jimmy Cayne and Sloan Kettering, and they were blazin’ that shit up everyday.
when is charlie going to come clean with his steroid abuse? just asking.
Ah yes, Robitussin and the back seat of a ’68 Buick. She was heavy-lidded and remote. I can’t remember her name.
You sayin’ dat I got fuckin’ roid rage, pal??! You’re tryin’ to sell that bullshit to me, an investigative joinalist and best sellin’ fuckin’ author??! If you say dat to my face, I’ll fuck ya up, ya little fuckin’ weasel.
Ah, you fuckin’ bloggers. I don’t give a shit about any of yous.
-CG