According to Vanity Fair, which ranks the duo at slot 69 (you see what they did there?) today on its annual New Establishment list. Einhorny is 87, and John Paulson, who’s yet to prove himself to the magazine, is nowhere to be found. The Big Man, who was placed in the super demeaning spot of 99 (out of 100) last year did not make the cut this time around, nor did Ben Bernanke because, really, what has that guy ever done? Blankfein is the number one stunna, and to that end, Matt Taibbi, not present or accounted for, can suck LB’s gold-plated scrot. Others to note:
4. Warren Buffett
6. Larry Fink
9. Jamie Dimon
43. Tyler Perry
86. Meredith Whitney
Update: Never let it be said that Vanity Fair doesn’t have a pair. After fumbling around and fucking up Steve Cohen’s online entry last year so that all of his “in the news” links went to stories about other guys named Steve Cohen, they’ve had the gall to stick him in an auxiliary list called “The Pit Stop.” It’s there that the magazine has singled out other money honeys (Steve Schwarzman, Bruce Wasserstein, etc) who’ve made the list in year’s past only to fall off in 2009 and offered the pep talk that if they put their noses to the grindstone, maybe, just maybe, they’ll have their honor of seeing their names alongside Maria Bartiromo’s in 2010. Damien Hirst was also thrown in the mix, because, let’s be honest, he’s one trick pony, and the number of animal-in-formaldehyde fetishists are few and far between. He’s not doing well unless Big Daddy’s doing well (and with the cheddar he had to shell out upfront to cross-breed a collie with a CNBC on-air commentator for his latest piece, Big Daddy had better do very well).
Maria Bartiromo And Erin Burnett Are (Collectively) More Important Than David Einhorn And John Paulson
By Bess LevinComments (65)
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Funny.
Too funny.
I wouldn’t pose topless, so that bastard Graydon Carter blackballed me.
Einhorn is Finkle.
But at Vanity Unfair:
#34 ……. Billy Mays (posthumously)
#53…….. “Sell Your Gold Guy” (Tuh-DAY…….)
#18 ……. Credit Report Dot Com Guy
#44 ……. DumbassTrader.com guy
Where’s Tim Sykes?
Where is Chaz on the list?
big momma in da hizzous!
Where am I on that list?
–Mark Klein, MD
wtf am I, chopped liver?
-dennis kneale’s sexually abused collie
Boss just said I didn’t make the Vanity fair “list”. I said I don’t have a speech impediment.
~Tweet Trader
@2 What does that mean, really?
@12: “really” is an adverb. You can google those kind of things.
~Lt. Frank Drebin
Police Squad
Maria is clearly not talking about Bernie in that image!
~SW
So which large bank shit the bed today?
@14
She’s talking about my $5 foot long.
@15 can you shut the god damn fuck and stay focussed? namely on the fact that I didn’t make this piece of shit? thx.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/09/01/maria-bartiromo-presses-4_n_274024.html
@7
I am dah fuckin’ list!
-CG
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/09/01/maria-bartiromo-presses-4_n_274024.html
Vikram – I know you’re a big deal in Punjabiland. People know you.
Btw – is it true that the Patel’s are the jews of southeast asia?
i showed them my tits and still didn’t make this thing? what gives?
Is Maria making some sort of rude gesture referencing something of Ms. Weinstein’s?
that’s it graydon carter, i’m going to fuck you til you love me. assholes will be eaten.
-mike
One of the Three Stooges made #6 on the list? WTF?
~AIG Quant
Clinton highre than Bono and Oprah. Go Bill!!
Burnett looks like a dude in drag in this pic…
Maria B
What about me? JC tells me that I am a power bottom. That should be worth something.
LD
complete rubbish…..
What show were they doing when that image was made?
@30 – All Tit Fucking Vol. XI
Tag says it all. Wonder who Bartiromo blew (etc) for this one, and Burnett, I’m just at a loss there unless someone @ VF (Ahem Graydon) has a penchant for long-haired pre-pubescent boys.
this list is meaningless without megan fox
Puts even the best banker spending sprees to shame. Don’t know if any of us can claim 500k on coke: http://www.news.com.au/story/0,27574,26006020-401,00.html
No Megan Fox but her clubbed thumbs came in at #68
Marias haircut is so dated….
Its sorta 90s Anniston….meets Mama Leones hostess
She makes Erin look young which is miraculous
I”m seriously still waiting for an explanation as to why I was left off this thing. I’ll wait, and I’ve got all day.
-vikula
They put Stevie in the Pit Stop this year.
we need hair and makeup on the set, stat! btw, how’s that double chink working for ya erin?
boom, done!
Nevah myke a “V” shape with yer hends in Austrailiar unliss yer tilkin about a stock chott.
36 FT friggin W
“Mamma Leone’s Hostess” no one should ever refer to Maria B by any other name ever again. It’s perfect.
“train station” would’ve been top 20 on her own, but i guess going solo ain’t her style…
oops, ment double “chin” not “chink”…cluzo is not a racist, so don’t even go there…
What a tasty picture – right in between them…ahhhhh…
Hirst = The shit. Check it – http://www.trekbikes.com/us/en/stages/hirst/
@44 are you fucking kidding me? i woudln’t even buy that piece of shit.
“He’s not doing well unless Big Daddy’s doing well (and with the cheddar he had to shell out upfront to cross-breed a collie with a CNBC on-air commentator for his latest piece, Big Daddy had better do very well).”
holy shit that’d better be for me. I’ll charge 50&500 (million) if I have to.
@46 Get back to sorting the mail fucko.
@47 what are you talking about? that was a standard db comment and very funny. also, blow me, douche.
@44 Real butterflies. In context, very nice.
VF put DH in the Pit Stop this year, too.
@48 you can’t just say that your own shit is funny and so be it. It’s mob rule here and so far no one else thinks so.
Now go clean out your mother’s old douche bag.
@49 yes, we all read bess’s update.
@50 46 was funny. you sound bitter. why is that?
-not 46/48
She’s no Bess but Maria actually looks pretty good in that pic. She’s been on the downhill trajectory for years but there is something going on there that is getting me feeling a bit on the turgid side of things. Erin looks like shit. Old and worn. The whole implant story is clearly a non-reality.
@53 if bartiromo looks better than usual in that pic it’s because it’s over a year old.
@54 – Thanks for the heads-up. There is hope for the implants yet!
@55 eb did not get implants. that was a retarded rumor perpetuated by the more “special” db readers based on a one-off joke by bess like a year ago that someone at cnbc had had work done.
Wasted picture. Should have been a caption contest.
So nobody else thinks VF got it just about right? Just about?
@57 wasted use of comment space. that picture is from over a year ago, and was caption contest fodder at the time. next time keep up.
@58 no.
Hypothetically, of course, but who is the six, and who is the nine? I’m thinking Maria’s too heavy, but Erin was a college athlete.
John Paulson doesn’t care and will let his returns speak for themselves.
Erin should be insulted that she was put on the same level as Maria. I think Maria wants to do ANYTHING she can to keep Erin down. So low.
Я конечно в этом не особо разбираюсь, но после вашей статьи стал гораздо больше понимать. Благодарствую :)
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