We can’t say for sure it’s going to happen but we can definitely get you one step closer to reaching out and giving the Vickle a tickle. Pandit will be at the 92nd Street Y tomorrow night in an interview with Businessweek‘s Steven J. Adler on the topic of, among other things, whether or not the Citi CEO thinks the recession is over, and the organizers would like to throw some of your brain busters Pandito’s way. The two best questions left below will receive free tickets to the big show. Do your worst.
Archive for September 2009
It took a bit longer than expected, and in another country, but the world may now get a glimpse at the wisdom of direct government purchases of toxic assets. Faced with the near Icelandic state of its banks, the Irish government is planning on going long the real estate market to the tune of €54bn to help get credit flowing again. The newly created National Asset Management Agency will receive a 30% discount on the €77bn loan portfolio coming off bank balance sheets and then call for nationwide prayer to help property prices rise the 10% over 10 years required for the government to break even. If there was ever a time for the luck of the Irish to come through, this is it.
Ireland to Pay EU54 Billion for Banks’ Risky Loans [Bloomberg]
We’re not yet finished with James Stewart’s New Yorker story, The Eight Days of the Financial Crisis, in which he takes us through the events of September 12 to September 19, 2008, but so far there’s lots of good stuff. Bernanke, who’s never yelled before, raises his voice to Hank Paulson, of all people, knowing exactly what the Hammer could do to him with just one hand. Jamie Dimon uses the word “pussyfoot” when telling AIG’s Willumstad to get his ass in gear. John Mack’s close personal friends call to tell him sorry, but they’re pulling their money from Morgan Stanley. An unnamed CEO cries while on the phone with Tim Geithner. And Lloyd Blankfein tells a Master of the Universe to quit being such a puss.
At 11AM, for the fourth consecutive day, investment bankers filed into the New York Fed. “I don’t think I can take another day of this, a Goldman banker told Lloyd Blankfein as they got out of the Goldman car.
“You’re getting out of a Mercedes to go to the New York Federal Reserve,” Blankfein responded. “You’re not getting out of a Higgins boat on Omaha Beach.”
Oh, and Hank Paulson smears some on some lipstick.
As you’re aware, Warren Buffett spent yesterday at the Fortune Women in Power Conference where he laid pipe and talked shop. After regaling the ladies assembled with a story about how he could’ve possibly saved Lehman if he wanted to to (/knew how to check voicemail), the Oracle Of O has moved on to some serious trash talk. What he doesn’t seem to get here is that it’s actually pretty incredible what Lewis was able to accomplish, considering what his blood alcohol levels were during those frightening weeks last year, and rather than be hated on, maybe we should be praising the guy for going above and beyond what anyone expected, namely vomiting on his shoes.
Buffett, the billionaire investor who runs Berkshire Hathaway, said Tuesday at Fortune’s Most Powerful Women Summit in San Diego that Lewis — the embattled Bank of America chief executive officer — was the “ironic hero” of last September’s economic meltdown.
But make no mistake, the emphasis was on ironic. Buffett’s comments portray Lewis as a sort of Mr. Magoo of global finance, bumbling into trouble in stubborn pursuit of banking greatness — and unintentionally saving the world in the process.
Warren Buffett came to bury Ken Lewis, not to praise him. [Fortune]
Pandito is busy speaking at the Barclays conference today but if he can get out in time you bet your asses he’ll be there. Above a sale of necklaces, pendants and bracelets up for grabs at what a Big C employee has described as “I shit you not, a chincy jewelry sale going on in the Citi cafeteria right now.” We have no idea what the hell this is about but presumably it’s part of someone’s genius plan to bring Vikram’s goal of making Citi “the best company in the world bar none” on home. Act now.
Always true to his word, Zimbabwean President Robert Mugabe has given the all clear for investors to put their cash in the (former) breadbasket of Africa, While you may be required to take a leap of faith that the performance of your investments will have more to do with market forces than the big boss’s mood, a lot has changed recently. Back in March, Mugabe had some slightly different words for potential investors in agriculture to consider.
“There is no going back on the land reforms. Farms will not be returned back to former [white] farmers,” Mugabe said. “That work will continue, but those farms have to be used properly.
“The farmers who owned these farms, which now have been designated and offered to new owners, must respect that law,” he said. “They must vacate those farms.”
But time goes on and people change. It was only last year that opposition leader Morgan Tsvangirai won the first round of elections and then decided that it wasn’t really in his best interest to pursue the run-off elections against Mugabe if he valued his life. Now there is a power “sharing” agreement in place and Zimbabwe is one big happy family. So for investors looking to expand beyond the hedge fund world, the president wants you to remember his tag line.
“The sanctity of property rights and the rule of law in all its dimensions are fully respected,” Mugabe said.
This was his second choice after learning ‘put your assets in our hands’ was already taken.
This is not the sort of feel good news we were hoping to have fall in our laps this afternoon. In fact it’s downright depressing but we’re going to get it out there, and deal with it together. Dick Fuld has abandoned his membership at a second golf club. First it was Blind Brook Country Club in Purchase and now, according to Cityfile, it’s Quaker Ridge Golf Club in Scarsdale. As many of you probably know, the Dick’s number one sport is squash, but recent reports claim he hasn’t been seen swinging a racquet in quite some time. So no squash, and now no golf. Why is this happening? He’s got the money to cover fees (though Charlie Gasparino is under the impression he needs work), is he ashamed to show his face? Do members not want the Lehman taint? Are the caddy’s giving him shit? Is he just depressed and not up for much activity? Is he taking up polo*? Help us to understand.
*Please say yes.
Today in the story that never ends: Scott Cohn reports that Andy has subpoenaed 5 Bank of America directors to be tied up in a meatlocker and deposed under oath to suss out the situation re: did they or did they not know John Thain had sold them an asston of crap.
Mikey Moore went on Jay Leno last night to hock his new movie, Capitalism: A Love Story, and also to discuss where we are now. In Moore’s professional opinion, things have not gotten better, and the scams are proliferating and something about eating til you explode? That’s all I can get from this.
LENO: Now it’s one year since Lehman Brothers collapsed. We’ve had all, OK, we’ve handed out… Is Wall Street any better? Have they learned anything?
MOORE: No, not at all. It’s, it’s probably worse. They’re still doing these exotic derivatives. They’re now trying to do it with life insurance. They’ve got all these crazy schemes. I mean, that’s what I’m saying about capitalism, it’s like a beast. And no matter how many strings or ropes you try and tie it down with that beast just wants more and more money. And it will go anywhere. It will try to gobble up as much as it can. The word ‘enough’ is the dirtiest word in capitalism, ‘cuz there’s no such thing as enough with these guys. And we haven’t stopped them.
Barclays may not so big on credit market vol these days but they are big on keeping part of its former principal mortgage trading desk busy. A toxic asset stew of monoline wrapped structured credit assets, RMBS, and assorted other residential mortgage goodies totalling close to $12.5 billion will be moving (sort of) from Barclays to a newly established fund, R3 Capital Partners Protium Finance LP. At the helm of Protium we find Stephen King, former head of Barclays Capital’s Principal Mortgage Trading Group and Michael Keeley, former Barclays Capital’s management committee member. Protium is, in turn, managed by C12 Capital Management which is currently home to a fair number of other Barclays principal mortgage trading alumni.
Protium is paying for this bounty, at fair value of course, with $450 million in new equity and a $12.6 billion 10-year loan from the Barclay’s mother ship. The assets remain on Barclays balance sheet for regulatory purposes while the task of dealing with the ongoing and varying definitions of fair value goes to justifying the management fees the former Barclettes will be collecting at the top of the waterfall. Evidently the MBS circle of life has not been broken.
Maria Bartiromo: Hey, Remember That Time Erin Burnett Called George Bush A ‘Monkey’? How Racist Was That?
By Bess LevinVisit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy
So MSNBC had a segment today about whether or not there’s animosity toward Obama based on race. They had a whole bunch of guests on, most of whom were getting very heated and in the top right corner of the screen there was Maria Bartiromo, silent. She had something to say but wasn’t sure how to fit it in. Then, at the three minute mark, she hears her cue! Michael Dyson has just asked if anyone used racial rhetoric toward Bill Clinton or George Bush when they were in office. The wheels start to turn. Literally, watch as the eyes dart back and forth. This is her moment– she came armed with an anecdote about Erin Burnett calling Bushy a ‘monkey’ almost two years ago– and damn it she’s going to use it! Fuck it if it doesn’t make sense since calling a white man a monkey isn’t racist, and what Erin meant was that he was stupid! Fuck it, MB says! She’s going to bring this up, this super awkward slip o’ the tongue that got her competition in some trubs at the time. If you don’t want to jump all over it, and run with it, and ask your viewers if Erin Burnett hates white people, that’s your problem, Joe Scarborough. Go on with the Coltan!
