• 30 Oct 2009 at 4:40 PM

Bernie Madoff: Screwing The SEC, Anyone That Tickles His Fancy From Inside The Joint

By Bess Levin

berniedance.jpgCNBC reports the first bits of news from Bernie Madoff’s latest prison interview. First off, he cannot express how crazy it is that he got away with all this but if he had to identify one reason it was probably so easy was the fact that “everything the SEC did before 2006″ was a “waste of time.” Also? That broad running the new and improved Securities and Exchange Commission? Mary Schapiro? She’s “a dear friend” of the Master o’ Ponz. So basically this is how it’s going to work. Every few months, for remainder of his sentence, Bernie’s going ruin someone’s reputation by claiming they are one of his close personal friends, trusted advisor or fuck buddy. Who’s next? You tell us.
Update: Oh god it keeps getting better. Whistleblower “Harry Markopolos” was “a joke inside the industry” and “jealous” of Madoff’s returns.

Comments (15)

  1. 1
    Posted by guest | October 30, 2009 at 4:47 PM

    Bernie-boy — PLEASE mention Greg Michaels’ name. We’re begging you.

  2. 2
    Posted by guest | October 30, 2009 at 4:48 PM

    Mary Schaprio is a dear friend of MINE.
    -CG

  3. 3
    Posted by guest | October 30, 2009 at 4:49 PM

    guest@1 fuck you
    my bet is that biff did a lot of coke with ponzi boy.

  4. 4
    Posted by guest | October 30, 2009 at 4:49 PM

    She’s lucky she didn’t get the Picower treatment.

  5. 5
    Posted by guest | October 30, 2009 at 4:51 PM

    Why do guys like Madoff get all the attention?
    ~Jeff S.
    Keeryestitscold, MN

  6. 6
    Posted by guest | October 30, 2009 at 4:53 PM

    cg is a good friend of mine. he’s especially good with a baseball bat – great guy to have aeound when i had to collect on those loans .
    i wish him luck in the new career. did i say he had lots of contacts?
    -berns

  7. 7
    Posted by guest | October 30, 2009 at 5:09 PM

    Don’t fuck with Harry the Greek.
    -J. Dimon

  8. 8
    Posted by american bandersnatch | October 30, 2009 at 5:13 PM

    Go ask the Trojan Women what happens when you mess with the Greeks …

  9. 9
    Posted by guest | October 30, 2009 at 5:17 PM

    Bernie Madoof is
    *** wait for it ***
    *** wait for it ***
    a shitheel.

  10. 10
    Posted by guest | October 30, 2009 at 6:00 PM

    A Greek and Italian were arguing over who had the superior culture.
    The Greek says, “We have the Parthenon.”
    Arching his eyebrows, the Italian replies, “We have the Coliseum.”
    The Greek retorts, “We Greeks gave birth to advanced mathematics”
    The Italian, nodding agreement, says, “But we built the Roman Empire.”
    And so on and so on until the Greek comes up with what he thinks will end the discussion. With a flourish of finality he says, “We invented sex!”
    The Italian replies, “That is true, but it was the Italians who introduced it to women.”

  11. 11
    Posted by NotNasser | October 30, 2009 at 7:10 PM

    Mary Schapiro was also a close personal friend of mine. Heck, I can show you a letter with something like her signature to prove it. I’ll meet you in her office.
    – Marc Dreier

  12. 12
    Posted by guest | October 30, 2009 at 8:08 PM

    @10: eat a dick
    -JD

  13. 13
    Posted by guest | October 31, 2009 at 5:52 AM

    I wonder if Mr. Madoff enjoys yachting.
    – Alicia Wetmore.

  14. 14
    Posted by guest | November 2, 2009 at 4:19 AM

    Gosh Bess
    The way you write “Fuck buddy” makes me get all hard.
    WE need more posts with Bess’s filthy pillow mouth…
    GGGrrraaaoooR.
    yours leg humpingly
    Tiger Trader

  15. 15
    Posted by guest | November 2, 2009 at 9:26 AM

    As much anyone may hate to admit it, the fat fuck is right about the SEC. They really fucked up right and proper.

Leave a comment

You can log in with your account or comment as a guest below.

   or