You might not have known this but Charlie Gasparino has a book called “The Sell-Out” coming out in November. Since CNBC hasn’t let him plug it on air, Chaz has been having to go through other channels to promote the thing, including a guerilla marketing campaign that involves leaving ripped out pages of the tome in the men’s rooms of various bucket shops all over town. But with the release date fast approaching, Gaspo has naturally wanted to up the press for his contribution to literature. So when Don Imus asked CG to appear on the his radio show yesterday, Chazza agreed immediately. Though he prefers the medium of television, feeling strongly that you should get to see the Jabroni Pony’s face while he delivers his scoops, he was excited to tap another audience of potential readers, and also just to spend some time with Don, who is a friend. Unfortunately, CNBC didn’t quite see it that way, what with the I-Man working for their competition, Fox Business, as of next Monday. They put the kibosh on the whole thing, and Gasparino was forced to leave an awkward “I hate to do this to you” message of Don’s voicemail late Tuesday night. How did the NAACP Image Award nominee take to the perceived snub? Not so good!
But he recovered nicely, and found a replacement! In the audio clip below “Charlie Gasparino” and Don dish on a whole bunch of subjects, including but not limited to CG’s take on the Toyota recall (“economically speaking? bad”), Chaz’s column in the Post this week, which after some prodding he admits was ghost written by Charles Dickens, Charlie’s use of Flomax, which he takes on account of “it being like a sprinkler down there” and “pissing in Morse Code,” whether or not Gaspo is an A-lister in the business world, and Imus’s thoughts on CNBC, summed up thusly: “They’ve got a bunch of fat, snarky drunks on at all time, and they’re running pornos at night.”
Interestingly enough, Chazza tells us that several of his friends from the old neighborhood called him up after hearing the segment, under the impression that this was actually him, either because the imposter did a bang-up job on the impression (dubious) or because the abuse of prescription drugs to treat flow control problems is more true to life than previously thought (likely).
Dis n’dat
Nappy headed jabronis!
cavuto is a-list in business? imus you fucking murdoch-whore.
Andrew Ross Sorkin never would’ve pussied out like that. Just sayin’…
who you calling drunk you stupid dick?
-maria b
Jerkin the gherkin
dis means war
-cg
how bouts a game’a find da salame
Charles Dickens is a friend of mine.
I’ll show you my fuckin pair you piecea washed up shit!
-cg
Bo Dietl vs. Chaz in a slap fight…who wins?
Excuse me folks, but I could use some help from you regular readers of Dealbreaker. Does anyone know if Jim Cramer is still long CIT? I’m in at $2.20 on 100,000 shares – I hope this works out.
Gasparino is a nappy headed ho.
- The I man
@11 stevie
http://dealbreaker.com/2009/08/steve-cohen-is-ready-to-laugh.php
-sc
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Love this!
I’m da reason Imus mumbles.
-CG
Ungh…gurgle…huh….eh….can’t come on….gungh…heh…urp…nappy….
12 call Seth Davis ASAP.
Dat fuckin’ raisin skinned skunk Imus is no fuckin’ friend a’ mine!!! Dis is a fuckin’ outrage!
Who da fuck does this fake cowboy think he’s fuckin’ with? Did he break da Ken Lewis story 60 minutes before it was on PBS Newshour? No. I did. Cuz I have da high level sources.
Imus, like all a’ dem damned blogger assholes, envies my greatness and my literary genius. For dis insult, I’m gonna get Deirdre to do a little bocchino on my little Jamboni.
-cg
Chaz,
Shorties got yo back, kid.
Rutgaz Squad
Gotta confess, guys: The real reason I backed outta Imus is ’cause I forgot my eyeglasses.
-CG
I heard Erin plugging the book during Charlie’s call-in this morning. Is she that big of a rules-breaker, or is plugging-by-proxy OK?
@22 sarcasm: you should try and detect it every now and then (Charlie’s book is plugged every single time he appears on CNBC, obnoxiously so).
@23 Thanks. I was afraid Erin was in big trouble, or was in fact a “bad girl.”
- 22/gullible
First ads for Rosetta Stone now for a book on CNBC. Their average viewer has trouble with English and probably isn’t literate. Hope Comcast fixes that pile o’ crap.
BTW, da fuckin’ Flonase ain’t workin’ da way its supposed to.
I keep spraying dat shit into my meatus, but I’m still pissin’ like a fuckin’ lawn sprinkler. And da shit burns too. Do any DB readers have any success wit da Flonase?
-cg
Here comes da guk.
-CG
@cg
Its not a going problem, its a growing problem, write that down.
A public service announcement regarding Flomax:
Doc hooked me up with a week’s supply to help ease out a kidney stone. Side effect says, “possible reduced semen flow.” Figured, well, the wife won’t mind.
I don’t know what older guys with chronic prostate issues do, but if it’s just an interim thing I’d recommend taking the week off. Imagine running a 5K and sprinting that last 100 meters only to fall down abruptly just when reaching for the tape. DNF. Described elsewhere as “reverse climax.”
@29:
Ya think dis Flomax shit is better den the Flonase stuff I’ve been usin? I can probably deal wit a little less of my essence, if it means da burning stops.
-cg
Comcast is gonna come in and the first thing they’ll do is wonder why guys like Kernen and MariaB are making the coin they are and that’ll change reaaaallll fast.
#31 And Dennis K is overpaid at minimum wage.
When MCC leaves will they retire her sweater?