Unlike Merrill Lynch, Goldman Sachs is yet to give official word whether or not their annual Hannukah Hoedown will be happening this year. Obviously they’ve got the cash on hand to throw the thing, but wouldn’t want to give certain Rolling Stone scribes the satisfaction of crashing and writing that “the punch tasted suspiciously like that of human blood– obviously not a coincidence and one that gives some serious credence to my thesis.” As for partying themselves, outside the office, that’s been nixed, though apparently it will not stop some brave young souls.
To: DealBreaker
From: [redacted at GS]
Subject: Holiday Parties At Goldman
Apparently self-funded ones are not cool. We started talking about planning one this week and the word came down from the management team that it was a no go. It doesn’t help that one of our MDs was in Hank’s cabinet and is a major guardian of the brand, so I’m not surprised it was squashed early.
Obviously they don’t want to enrage the populists but it still sucks. That being said, we still got together last year when we weren’t supposed to and we likely will again. I feel like I’m in high school again trying to throw a party without my parents or school administration catching wind. Lame.
man up and rent out Cipriani Wall Street, call all the press, proceed to give everyone the finger while sipping Cristal on the red carpet with 2 eastern european models hanging on your arms.
DO it.
So the private concert by Kinky Friedman and the Texas Jewboys is definitely off?
hatehatehate
“There was a rumor
About a tumor..
Nestled at the base of his brain…..”
********************
From “The Ballad of Charles Whitman” by Kinky Friedman.
I don’t think that “The Most Interesting Man in the World” would have ever fit in at Goldman.
oy
Personally, I’d prefer the Ritz-Carlton. The lounge overlooking the harbor. Let me know if you’d like help planning this.
Oh, BS…I heard they were going to have a pinata party with a pinata that looks like HP and that when it breaks gold coins will fall out of it.
Goldman’s parties generally end up like a cross between Blade and V. Everything’s rocking and then all of a sudden the Goldman MD’s take off their masks revealing their vampire squid nature and they shove their blood funnels down the unlucky guests’ throats. It pretty intense the first time or two you see it. Still, they do serve top shelf liquor.
The writer of that (redacted at GS)memo sounds quite “lame” himself.
TGFD thinks it’s an adolescent “he” rather than a “she” because that clown still spends too much time thinking about high school, as many adolescent males do.
On the other hand, chicks seem to get over their high-school days once they enter college, and surely once they’ve entered the workforce.
TGFD’s advice to the clown? Quit whining about your party situation and be more thankful for your employment situation.
BTW, others obviously agree. Hence the low turnout (9) on this thread.
The Guy from Delaware
And by the way – the TGFD doesn’t mean to push this GS clown in the corner or anything. Who can blame a party animal, especially at his/her age. Therefore, TGFD formally invites any and all GS employees over to TGFD’s cabin. I’ve got a hot tub and some kick-ass trance music.
When: Dec. 18, 2009
Where: Palace de la TGFD, Dundee, DE
What to bring: shaving cream, Little Debbie’s snack cakes, 2 snake-bite repair kits, a leather glove, three snorkel/goggle sets, and a box of clothes hangers.
See you there,
The Gay from Deleware
Lloyd Blankfein is a shitheel.
Everybody I’ve ever known named Lloyd has been a shitheel.
All Lloyds are shitheels.
Gay@#11…
HaHaHa! Ingenious, to be sure.
One correction, though…TGFD lives in a trailer, not in a cabin. Many DBers already know about how the trailer has been bombed-out on several occasions by DB management.
The trailer still endures, though. Just like TGFD.
Thanks for the laugh. Really funny & clever.
The Guy from Delaware
@9 (AB) Were you in FISG?