jimmycayne.jpgAs everyone on the planet knows, Jimmy Cayne loves to get high. For some reason, however, he routinely downplays or outright denies any drug use, even though weed has done so much for him. First off, due to its mind clearing properties, Cayne has come up with some of his best ideas while stoned, which Wall Street Marijuana and Cough Syrup Expert Charlie Gasparino details in his new book, The Sell-Out. Coupla things JC came up with while he was “thinking straight,” which the ex-CEO has never been given adequate credit for are 1) to refer to Goldman as “Goldman Sucks” (which seems like such an obvious nickname but took several hits on the grav-bong to put in rotation) and 2) to bring down an 85 year-old institution for shits and giggles.
Second, Bear Stearns would not have soared to the heights it did (pre-crashing to the ground a burning fiery explosion) if it weren’t for the fact that Cayne regularly brought deals home by offering people some of his stash, which he claimed was the best on the Street and no one could resist, not even “a Jew.” From The Sell-Out:

“[Larry] Friedlander also wanted a guarantee: $40,000 a month plus commissions. Cayne said he could handle that as well. Cayne, however, wasn’t sure he had iced the deal. So he really began to turn on the charm. “Listen, you’re going to love working here,” he said. Cayne spoke about Bear as a big family, where Friedlaner’s ethnicity as a Jew wasn’t a drawback as at other firms, such as Morgan and even blue-blood Jewish firms such as Goldman “Sucks,” as Cayne liked to call Goldman Sachs.
Cayne then gave Friedlander one last reason to work at Bear: “Come over here,” he said as he opened the bottom drawer of his desk and pointed. “You should also know I get the best pot in New York City.”

Comments (25)

  1. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 2:07 PM

    love this guy

  2. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 2:07 PM

    dis is all true. I got contacts
    -cg

  3. Posted by Sir Smoke-a-lot | October 19, 2009 at 2:08 PM

    “Doctor says I need a back-e-atomy”

  4. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 2:09 PM

    He looks so blazed as an eagle in that pic.

  5. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 2:11 PM

    we REALLY need the Ashley Dupre pic

  6. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 2:12 PM

    who cares..drinking much worse

  7. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 2:13 PM

    Cayne is a classic character, sotires of him never get old

  8. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 2:17 PM

    I came up with my best ideas crunked out on purple drink. Sometimes Boone’s just ain’t enough.
    -Dirty South K-Lew

  9. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 2:17 PM

    @6 “drinking much worse”
    huh? cayne’s drinking? drinking in general? wtf are you talking about.

  10. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 2:23 PM

    I could see us being good buddies.
    -KL

  11. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 2:29 PM

    little clear boxes Jim? never heard of em

  12. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 2:32 PM

    @3, then you better talk to Sampson!

  13. Posted by Anal_yst | October 19, 2009 at 2:33 PM

    @6
    you can’t prove that

  14. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 2:36 PM

    charlie gasparino hates jews.

  15. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 2:37 PM

    Suck on my golden scrotes, pothead.
    -Blue-blood squirting squid

  16. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 2:50 PM

    @6 is obviously JC

  17. Posted by CoveredLong | October 19, 2009 at 2:55 PM

    Whoa, $40,000 a month, that’s $960,000 a year! I only make $700,000 a year…that’s way less than his $40,000 a month.
    …now, if only I could pay someone my salary in exchange for his, that could be some real arbitrage opportunity right there.
    -Former Bear Quant

  18. Posted by CoveredLong | October 19, 2009 at 3:00 PM

    @13 – Can you disprove that he can?

  19. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 3:03 PM

    @17 the anecdote is from the 80s.

  20. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 3:14 PM

    I can see where being a Jew would be a drawback at “blue-blood Jewish firms, such as Goldman [Sachs].”
    It’s getting awfully close to D-Day for Sell-Out. Shouldn’t excerpts be appearing in print form by now, or did Sorkin and Faber suck all the air out of this bubble already.

  21. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 4:04 PM

    Blaze that nugg,, he probs got it from the NY hookup delivery service

  22. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 4:05 PM

    Blaze that nugg,, he probs got it from the NY hookup delivery service

  23. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 4:05 PM

    Blaze that nugg,, he probs got it from the NY hookup delivery service

  24. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 4:06 PM

    Blaze that nugg,, he probs got it from the NY hookup delivery service

  25. Posted by guest | October 19, 2009 at 4:29 PM

    @21-24, dood, your finger.

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