lennydykstrahangingtwizzlers.jpgAs you’re aware, brilliant legal mind Lenny Dykstra is representing himself in his “don’t call it bankruptcy” bankruptcy case (which has been converted from a Chapter 11 reorganization to a Chapter 7 liquidation). How are things going so far? Well, Nails has some complaints. First off, why isn’t anyone repping for Team Twizzlers?

Attorney Leonard Shulman, speaking on behalf of the estate, said, “This is a very sophisticated and complex case with quite a bit of litigation that can, and should, be pursued.” He said his office is working with Fireman’s Fund to settle for “just north of $1 million” to cover damage to both homes and to drop claims of bad faith against the insurer. Dykstra says that leaves only about $500,000 to repair the larger house, which “won’t even pay my experts to get started” on repairs. However, any settlement money will go to the estate, not to Lenny Dykstra. The former World Series champion vented in court that the estate’s lawyers weren’t looking after his interests. “I just heard everyone talk about everyone else. But what about Lenny?” Judge Mund advised Dykstra to get his own attorney. “Estate attorneys are not you.”

He’s not asking for much, you know. Just a place to rest his head, maybe tin of dip, an apology from Jim Cramer for giving him the Bear Stearns treatment, and a private jet. The basics.

Dykstra complained in court that his estranged wife has plenty of money (including his pension) while he has nothing. “I live in the street,” Dykstra said. “I don’t want anything special. My wife gets $25,000 a month, and she’s got $300,000 cash. You know what I got? Zero…I couldn’t even buy gas for my car.”

Really, will no one have a heart? The man can’t even afford to put himself up in a seedy motel for the night.


No, just fucking with you! LD’s got the cash on hand to buy The Mirage, if he felt like it. He just prefers Street Life.

Later, outside court, a CNBC producer asked Dykstra if he was truly living on the street. He replied with a smile, “No. I can live anywhere I want.”

Earlier: Lenny Dykstra Objects (To The Filthy Insuation He Stole The Fixtures Out Of His House, Would Go Back To Flying Commerical If His Life Depended On It)

Comments (19)

  1. Posted by guest | October 27, 2009 at 5:54 PM

    This piece of fuck had it coming.
    -Orel Hershiser

  2. Posted by guest | October 27, 2009 at 5:54 PM

    one of the greats.

  3. Posted by guest | October 27, 2009 at 5:54 PM

    He looks so regal in that pic.

  4. Posted by guest | October 27, 2009 at 5:56 PM

    chapter 11 -> chapter 7 -> dismissal -> bankruptcy fraud.

  5. Posted by guest | October 27, 2009 at 6:01 PM

    I got to chapter 11 and stopped reading.
    -LD

  6. Posted by guest | October 27, 2009 at 6:15 PM

    What’s that thing hanging from the corner of his mouth?

  7. Posted by guest | October 27, 2009 at 6:17 PM

    I am broke and I still carry a smirk.
    Possible thinking does it, dudes!

  8. Posted by guest | October 27, 2009 at 7:19 PM

    @6 A Twizzler

  9. Posted by guest | October 27, 2009 at 8:02 PM

    Love how MLB is jumping right in to help.

  10. Posted by guest | October 27, 2009 at 10:04 PM

    That what you are going to get by having that stupid Jim Cramer as friend.While he fooled people while he was a trader, he can fool anybody anytime and anywhere. It’s in his system

  11. Posted by HeadlessHorseman | October 27, 2009 at 11:06 PM

    This is bizarre. It’s as though he’s resolved to be expunged from society via a supernova of public humiliation entirely his own making, but he just can’t finish the job because he’s too distracted by a perpetual hard-on (sustained solely by his delusions of self-grandeur).
    In related news, Lenny Dykstra has inked a deal to be the spokesman for “Famous Fucktards”, an upstart porn website targeting schadenfreude enthusiasts. As part of the agreement, Mr. Dykstra has apparently sold the story of his spectacular journey from sports icon to what website promoters are advertising as “the new standard in sadomasochistic autofellatio.” The website’s owner is said to have obtained the rights to the story in exchange for an undisclosed number of flying hours in his 1972 Cessna 172 Skyhawk. While neither Mr. Dykstra nor his agent, a Mr. Charlie Gasporelli, were able to be reached for comment, we should note that the offices of “Gaspo’s Sports Super Bodega, Inc.” was destroyed earlier today in what is stunned onlookers are calling “a tragic gasoline fight accident”.

  12. Posted by guest | October 27, 2009 at 11:19 PM

    HH,
    For someone that (albeit, used to) bitches about the commentariat lacking in substance and humor, that was fucking awful. Glass houses.
    -The Horse You Rode in On

  13. Posted by guest | October 28, 2009 at 9:54 AM

    “I’m not bankrupt, this is Chapter 7, liquidation, that’s not bankruptcy.”
    LD

  14. Posted by Apollo | October 28, 2009 at 1:41 PM

    @10 I’m still waiting for what comes after “While” . . . ?

  15. Posted by guest | October 28, 2009 at 4:33 PM
  16. Posted by MIKEYINLA | October 29, 2009 at 6:03 AM

    I have a $300 check, Len Dykstra wrote on a closed account and gave as payment to an escort he called while staying in the W hotel – los angeles, in 8/09…….Hey Lenny what kind of scumbag rips off a working girl…….

  17. Posted by Tough as Nails | November 9, 2009 at 4:02 PM

    Lenny;
    Why is it that nobody believes anything you say? Sould it be because you’re a lying sack of shit?

  18. Posted by FTRsportsDOTcom | November 22, 2009 at 2:10 AM

    hey if anyone wants to read more about Lenny Dykstra’s antics lately or has news for us…. we’ve been breaking Dykstra stories regularly for a couple months now…. go check out FTRsports.com and read some Dykstra stories!!

  19. Posted by Fastestruck | September 25, 2010 at 6:13 PM

    I love this fucking guy. He’s a nut!!! Fucking twizzler hanging out of his mouth lol. Nails is an odd cat.

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