According to on-set sources, Shia LaBeouf has been shadowing real traders and trying his hand at the stock exchange and winning huge sums. An insider tells Star magazine, “He’s been learning the ins and outs of the market. Shia says that he’s made more than $50,000 already.”
fucking boy genius
I have a snarky comment that includes handbridges and some kind of clops. Am I cool?
@1, he’s just a fucking boy.
Handbridgeclops?
@2 you’re not cool because you thought *that* was a snarky, hilarious comment.
He’s one of the all-time greats.
this news is old. he had to stop trading and give the money back after Galleon’s offices were raided.
Someone should tell him that waxing knobs for $5 a pop does not count as “trading”.
oh, your helmet is so big…
@2, deliver the goods or go home, cock tease
@8 – $5 bucks? That little bastard owes me a $10 spot.
Greg
50k….It was better than sex.
I believe it. 10 mil at .5% = 50,000
That sounds right -especially if he was trading last quarter :)
I so can’t wait for this movie. I’ve already got a big helmet, and once I see the trading strategy I’ll be rich too.
He won’t make shit now that Raj and the other informants won’t feed him info.
David Wright called. He wants his helmet back.
“You LIE !!”
-Rep. Joe Wilson
Ignorance, SC
9 using the schwartz is the new killing it
I have a hilarious comment that makes fun of Greg and suggests Bess meet me for buggery, but it needs to be read using a Charlie Gasparino Italian-American accent. It’s hilarious, I promise.
It’s easy to make money in any market using this method: Take the daily high, the daily low and daily close. Average them and divide by 3. That number is the pivot. Above the pivot you buy. Below the pivot you sell………..WHAT???? Oh SHIT!!!! I gave it away??? But I thought…..
~New Dude at Goldman Sachs’ Super Private , Secret Trading System Department
@19 how about you come up with a hilarious comment that actually has relevance to this post? can you do that, champ?
market = euphemism for gay porn
I just sharted.
shia labeouf is the new killing it
@20 FTW..
@19, that commment is actually funny when read in a Stewie Griffin voice
That’s a lot of Spacebux. Imagine all ther Schwartz merch he can pick up from Yogurt.
God willing, we’ll all meet again in Spaceballs 2: The Search for More Money.
@17, ignorant nothing–the guy filled his campaign war chest to the brim with that little quip. Plus, the guy represents South Carolina–he’s got a government job for life!
http://bit.ly/3TNgdq
How could Megan Fox lay that slick faggot?
He would be no match for The Jewser!!
WTF with the helmet? Does his character fly Airwolf in his free time?
@30 Fox = 50% above 200-day MA.
since when can you trade institutional securities without a license?
He looks soooo Glass Steagal…
Ladies and Gentlemen, I believe we are witnessing a new LD in the making!
I’ve got an idea, instead of a coked up sex addict, let’s pick a thai lady boy to be the young apprentice this time around. i mean why make him likeable.
-OS
I’m looking forward to the part of the movie where he lowers his face plate and then begins doing battle with his light sabre.
up $50,000? I call that a slow Tuesday morning.
this is seriously going to compete with showgirls
Rich-kid minces by with little buckle shoes, a man-purse, and a big ole helmet with what appears to be a microphone attachment…Bullies of the world, I implore you! How can you stand idly by while this creature walks the planet un-Wedgied…un-Swirlied?
@34/dummy – Do you also think everyone with a Scottrade account must pass the 7?
@32 +1 for the obscure Clint Eastwood reference. Well played.
@43 I thought that was Firefox?
If he wants ANY props whatsoever he should step up and attempt the Vending Machine Food Challenge… until then, he’ll remain little more than a skinny, little dousche riding a fuckin’ scooter and wearing Gucci knock-offs.
Air Wolf was the Jan Michael Vincent guy, I think.
Clint Eastwood >>>> JMV.
Yo, pizza boy, how much you charge for extra toppings?
46 is right, on both counts.
-32
Half the f**king traders on the Merc don’t even have college degrees. Detox a bum, give him a suit and toss him in there too. Not impressive.
Hey, I got into Yale, I would have had a college degree by now if I wasn’t such a damn good trader.
-LeBeouf
@47, price is higher for mushrooms.
I bet Shia gives great helmet
Seriously if Stone is trying to make Wall Streeters out to look like douches, he’s doing an excellent job.
Boy, I remember the first time I was shot out of a canon!
This is the kid, shows up at the office 59 days in a row wearing that helmet, wants to be a member of the village people.
How about we adjust $8k in 1976 to today dollars, fagnob.
-SAC
@56 “fagnob” haha
@Anal_yst FYI – that’s what Ollie was trying to do the first time he made this movie.
Also, I hope they can claw back his compensation due to the likely high level of risk he’s taking for the firm. I’m definitely going to throw up all over anyone who mentions having seen this movie. And he’ll be responsible for all the damage.
@53 Could there really be any doubt after casting king douche in the lead?
@58
I know that, and this is obviously his revenge/repressed anger (or whatever) getting the best of him.
Only problem is no one wants to see some tool in skinny jeans talk about stocks for 2 hours, so hopefully this’ll divebomb like a mother effer and he’ll end up shooting himself in the foot.
$50,000 on a $500,000 investment, you go Shia!
Actors . . . is there anything they can’t do?
Capitalism: A LaBeouf Story
What?! You went over my helmet?!
Re: the shiatty way he’s walking: either he’s constipated or just had an “accident”.
Shemale looks in the abyss, there’s a dork with a helmet staring back at him. At that moment, he jumps in.
no ones commented on the microphone coming off the helmet or the shoes?
shoes look like ferragamo loafers
easy to tell because of the lame tapering pants
26 is right