• 20 Oct 2009 at 4:53 PM

Which Hedge Fund Is Gearing Up To Strip Search Employees In Wake Of Galleon?

By Bess Levin

Forbes reports that “an unnamed hedge fund” is seeking to bring in a specialist who can come in and “make sure employees are not wearing wires,” in an effort to screw (or: finger) said fund. Who do we think it is?
How Dirty Are Hedge Funds? [Forbes via BI]

Comments (29)

  1. 1
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 4:55 PM

    gotta be tranny town.

  2. 2
    Posted by american bandersnatch | October 20, 2009 at 4:59 PM

    @1 – I don’t think so. This Galeon thing has already given the big guy a reason to ask every employee to strip down to his bra and panties.

  3. 3
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 4:59 PM

    I strip search my employees but it has nothing to do with wires.
    -biff bassness

  4. 4
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 5:00 PM

    Make em all go to the sauna
    -Soviet HF manager who knows he has no employees wearing wires.

  5. 5
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 5:02 PM

    i dont know but sign me up!!!
    -andrea tong

  6. 6
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 5:03 PM

    Is this to finger colleagues?

  7. 7
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 5:06 PM

    We can only hope its Handbridge Capital

  8. 8
    Posted by Moose Fister | October 20, 2009 at 5:08 PM

    Fingering is so sensy.

  9. 9
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 5:10 PM

    This is like shutting the barn doors after the cows have been hauled off to FPMITAP.

  10. 10
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 5:11 PM

    We have strip-searches at D E Shaw all the time. It’s no big deal.

  11. 11
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 5:11 PM

    uh oh, does this mean they’ve replaced dancing girl?
    Dear Friends,
    I am pleased to announce that I have joined Luxor Capital Group as the Director of Investor Relations. Luxor is a hedge fund founded by Christian Leone in 2002 that invests opportunistically across the capital structure. Assets today are $1.8 billion. I am excited about the new role, and I look forward to speaking to all of you about Luxor in more detail.
    My new contact information is below.
    Kind Regards,
    Jenny Wood
    Jenny Wood
    Luxor Capital Group
    767 Fifth Avenue, 19th Floor
    New York, NY 10153
    (212) 763-8058
    jwood@luxorcap.com

  12. 12
    Posted by FBI | October 20, 2009 at 5:12 PM

    We’re washing the dog! We are washing the dog!

  13. 13
    Posted by Anal_yst | October 20, 2009 at 5:16 PM

    Will Wideclops be around to administer the stripsearches in her F-Me boots and a Whitney-esque S&M gear?

  14. 14
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 5:17 PM

    Who is searching the skinfolds of Larry Summers for wires is a much more important questions.

  15. 15
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 5:20 PM

    Just remember to check out that seemingly innocuous, oversized GAP tag stitched into the clothes– I’m just sayin’….
    http://news.softpedia.com/news/Wearing-a-Wire-Becomes-Obsolete-in-Real-Life-Will-Hollywood-Be-Next-55326.shtml

  16. 16
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 5:23 PM

    “Is … it … safe?”

  17. 17
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 5:28 PM

    http://www.brickhousesecurity.com/rf-bug-detector.html
    Hey Jimmy, how about this for $250 instead of creating a class action civil rights suit? And it comes with a free, White Noise generator as well!

  18. 18
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 5:31 PM

    “How ‘Dirty’ Are Hedge Funds?” FTW

  19. 19
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 5:31 PM

    OIH AM NAWT A CAWP!
    -Costigan

  20. 20
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 5:34 PM

    @12
    obscure reference… but genius.

  21. 21
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 5:34 PM

    Gives a new meaning to “naked short” if they are all going to have to receive their inside information tips in the buff.

  22. 22
    Posted by trojan | October 20, 2009 at 5:34 PM

    i thought Handbridge Capital was a finger-friendly workplace

  23. 23
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 5:38 PM

    @ 12
    I hear Raj has enlisted the services of Larry the surrogate…

  24. 24
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 5:52 PM

    My sources tells me dat its Long Term Capital Management.
    cg

  25. 25
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 5:56 PM

    GDCM will only require this of certain groups. If I have to iterate to you who they are, then we want nothing further to do with you at Grand Dragon Capital Management.

  26. 26
    Posted by polizeros | October 20, 2009 at 6:19 PM

    Right. Like that’ll help. Just walk into bathroom and text the info (with or without clever code words.) Or wait until after work and meet them at a bar.
    But I am cheered to hear of screaming hysterical panic among the former Masters of the Universe.
    I’m guessing that honest hedge funds aren’t doing this. Why? Because they don’t need to. It seems to be a truism of business that weasels attract weasels (and honest firms attract honest people)

  27. 27
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 7:01 PM

    Wires? GS has already implanted micro chips in all their heads.
    ZH

  28. 28
    Posted by guest | October 20, 2009 at 7:26 PM

    Workin’it Capital Management, LLC

  29. 29
    Posted by guest | October 21, 2009 at 4:09 PM

    Begs the question: when one is found to be wearing a wire, whats the assumed course of action?

Leave a comment

You can log in with your account or comment as a guest below.

   or