Count Vikula: “We are the world’s most global bank in a world that becomes more global every day.”
Track 2: “I feel good about our strategic clarity and aspirations.”
You Tell Us What He’s Trying To Say
Posted by Bess Levin, Oct 15, 2009, 11:09am
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Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:13AM
Kind of like the spread of STDs
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:14AM
@1 definitely has something to do with chlamyida.
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:16AM
suck it bitch.
-the kraw
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:17AM
Todays comments brought to you by the Citi Department of Redundancy Department
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:17AM
In October 2007 I became the most famous analyst in the world for initiating a sell call on this bank.
-mw
Posted by Lowly Assistant , Oct 15, 2009 11:17AM
Google translation: "Allow me to expose my colon once again. The ramification inflicted on the incision placed within the Fallopian cavities serves to be holistic taken from the Latin word 'jalapeno.'"
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:17AM
I think this is his best line yet.
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:18AM
I remember the days when the world wasn't global.
-old time banker
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:18AM
It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return, but what is the most painful is to love someone and never find the courage to let the person know how you feel.
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:19AM
He speaks like Greg writes
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:25AM
aspiration = gettin my fuckin zen garden.
-vp
Posted by pfluger , Oct 15, 2009 11:26AM
"There are known knowns. These are thing we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don't know we don't know."
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:26AM
you embarrass me so much.
-john paulson
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:27AM
who wants to see my tits? oh and citi can s my d.
-meredith
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:27AM
I like fruit, and I eat it all day.
John Paulson
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:28AM
I feel good about our strategic clarity and aspirations, but not so good that we will actually acheive anything.
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:29AM
He looks so global in that picture
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:29AM
@16 fuck off! but yes.
-vp
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:30AM
does he have wood in that pic?
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:31AM
We are the most Banky Bank, in the whole Banking Industry. We Bank, and we Bank hard. Sometimes our Banking isn't so good. Sometimes it Banks. But in the end, we'll be the ones laughing, all the way to the Bank.
Posted by Seaman Bodine II , Oct 15, 2009 11:32AM
Yes, well, when you head back to Mumbai and actually get the rising middle class in Nariman Point to pay 35 bounced check fees, then I'll believe in that strategy.
Until then, bottoms up on the yellow stuff.
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:32AM
@20 ftw
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:32AM
Translation: We may be fumbling about now, but soon enough we'll be buying GS out from under GoldScrot and I'll be hosting my conference calls from my Zen Garden.
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:32AM
@20 good shit. q4.
-vp
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:33AM
@23 okay tubby.
-LB
Posted by Meatbone9 , Oct 15, 2009 11:34AM
Squeal like a pig tax payers...thank you for the slices.
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:36AM
Our aspiration: To suck on the longc*ck that is GS.
-curryinahurry
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:36AM
There was an awkward pause on the phone. Blankfein had assumed that the Fed had pre-arranged the call. “Well, I’m calling you because at least some people in the world might be thinking that combining our firms would be a good idea,” he said. After another few moments of uncomfortable silence Pandit finally replied, “I want you to know I’m flattered by this call.”
Blankfein now began to wonder if Pandit was putting him on. “Well, Vikram,” he said briskly, “I’m not calling with any flattery towards you in mind.”
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:37AM
"becomes more global every day."
Like more spherical?
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:38AM
Count Vikula: “We are the world’s shittiest bank in a world that becomes more shitty every day.”
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:38AM
@28 never gets old.
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:38AM
Comment #1 auto translated from English to Greek then back to English. I think this ought to clear it up:
Numeration Vikula: “We are the world overaller bank in a world where he becomes overaller daily.”
Posted by Anal_yst , Oct 15, 2009 11:38AM
He looks like he has a FUPA in that pic.
Posted by mre , Oct 15, 2009 11:39AM
Strategery!
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:40AM
Mumbai boy needs to take care of his explosive diarrhea. Just Sayin'
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=explosive%20diarrhea
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:41AM
whatever. the slurring in charlotte will be worse.
-VP
Posted by Viktard , Oct 15, 2009 11:41AM
I dunno - I think the fact that
a) HSBC is definitely the most "global bank" (if for no other reason than the fact that the UK-based Hong Kong Shanghai Bank Corp splits functional management across two-and-a-half countries (and yes, idiots, I am only counting the city-state of hong kong as half a country))
and
b) the world isn't getting more global (google: trade protectionism)
and
c) that shittygroup is broke without its nearly broke governmental backer
mean that this guy really is a douché
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:43AM
He is trying to say he has a new speech writer named Greg
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:45AM
@37 touché
-vikz
Posted by merkin capital partners , Oct 15, 2009 11:47AM
Limitless paper in a paperless world.
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:47AM
A Mormon, a Jew, and an Indian walked into a bar...
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:48AM
serious question: what the hell is "strategic clarity"?
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:50AM
@37 MARK KLEIN, M.D.?
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:50AM
Think of me as a global rapist, everyone gets fucked.
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:53AM
Didn't someone just get some kinda big prize for having aspirations?
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 11:55AM
He is trying to say, "Great googily moogily, I am the new hotness. So many womens now will want to make sex with me. Great googily googily moogily."
Posted by Anal_yst , Oct 15, 2009 11:57AM
@43
#37 is way, way too cogent to be MKMD
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 12:26PM
Oh happy day! I just broke 80! It's sooooo good to be me.
Regards homeys
E. Stanley O'Neal
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 12:31PM
@21 We all know you visiting Mumbai that one time. Please stopping the drop of names of random places.
-Ajay aka A.J
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 1:49PM
What he's really thinking is that he's going to dress up as a fuzzy litle koala for Halloween.
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 10:14PM
Citi should be in the Dow. We all own it.
Posted by guest , Oct 15, 2009 10:14PM
Citi should be in the Dow. We all own it.