So Charlie Gasparino and Ken Feinberg had a 20 martini dinner last night, which came after Chaz’s keynote address at the Directorship 100. Gaspo told a captive audience that the Compensation Cop “has Wall Street by the stugats.” Before all that, though, Gasparino had a run in with Andrew Ross Sorkin, who you may have noticed the Jabroni Pony’s had some beef with of late. There’s the fact that the two have competing financial crisis books out, but the thing that’s mostly chapped CG’s hide is the section of Too Big To Fail wherein Sorkin claims Lloyd Blankfein was fed up with Gasparino’s alleged “rumor-mongering” last fall. Presumably trying to head off an awkward confrontation in the men’s room and/or a crowbar beatin’, ARS approached Chaz and told him, “I’m going to shake your hand.” The sensitive side of Chazpo came out and he asked Sorkin, “How would you feel if I wrote that?” Times-boy told CG he was sorry, and sufficiently pleased with the contrition, we’re told Gasparino, feeling particularly close to what he’s affectionately dubbed “my own personal Hymen Roth,” shared some thoughts on Blankfein: “A twerp with half a nut.” (We called Rego Park’s first son to confirm the description this morning– he told us “I’ll neither confirm nor deny” which CG will be the first to tell you is all the proof we need.) Anyway! Here’s a clip of Charlie demonstrating how to grab someone by what GE has required he refers to as their “you know whats.”
Did Erin Burnett Ask Gasparino About Kenneth Feinberg’s Hand Lotion Or Hand Motion? [BI]
That upper lip never gets old.
Johnny Cakes
The Sellout, Charlie Gasparino, speaking of hand lotion and pay czars. This is cg at his finest.
A financial journalist/investigative reporter in the finest tradition…..
Caution: he bites when he blows.
Once Comcast is behind the wheel there will be no need of euphemisms and Erin will be ordered to put out or move to the National Geographic Channel.
Write that down.
Lloyd Blankfein hates wasps.
I heard that cg may be moved over to Spike TV.
suck this half a nut, bitch.
-LB
Nobody evah needs any uh dat lotion wit me, its like splash whenevah I come aroun.
Remembah, I move markets.
-CG
cg’s jerking technique needs work.
dis fuckin’ guy.
-cg
half a sack or half a nut?
@11 you don’t wanna know. i see tings.
-cg
Hey!! When one is gold plating one’s scrotum on God’s orders, “nut” injuries can happen!
~A Certain Banker at 85 Broad
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-V02e-l6yGw
Chaz on acid.
sounds like he had a 20 martini breakfast.
Nothwithstanding the fact that with futures at $1,144/ounce Lloyd’s scrot is now worth more than house I’m bidding on the South Fork, he’s still an asshat.
I guess if you’re gonna package the GSAMP Trust 2006-S3 with $494mn of Fremont Investment & Loan originated toxic waste it makes sense to sell all but the X tranche.
Of course recognizing that the models that supported the product’s ratings, and most of its kind, were bogus it also makes sense to buy $13bn in CDS on the entire sector.
Then when the AIG backed CDS represent your biggest counterparty risk why not just buy CDS on AIG.
Finally when Ben and Timmmay come calling it makes perfect sense to accept $10bn from the TARP, $11bn from the Fed and $30bn from the FDIC.
That’s what I call a $3.4bn 3Q09 miracle.
It just gives me a headache. At noon while I’m destroying my pecs I’m gonna need to add some Mezzaluna to my chocolate protein shake.
Hey Lloyd, bafungool.
-Chazzy G.
Not my chair, not my problem.
@14 I know you posted that just for me and I’m sorry a little I clicked it, I should have stayed in the elevator it’s safer in there.
Thank G-d I wasn’t named Hymen.
I can’t believe dat dat fuckin’ donnicciola MILF is sellin’ more books den I am. I been goin’ rogue alot longer den her. What da fuck does she know, anyway?
Da ordinary man just duzn’t appreciate da authoritative accounting of da financial crisis. Dey’d rather read about dis broad and her bullshit.
@ pfluger, missing the legend for “donnicciola. n. f.” ?
TIA
@21: Sorry, I was in a rush. Goddamed pushy traders… ;-)
***
donnicciola f. (pejorative) silly or empty-headed woman; (referring to a male) sissy, weakling.
My wife has never complained about the size of my penis or my testicles.
Lloydus Blanfein
Can anyone at 85 confirm or deny that the run in gold is entirely due to 2nd & 3rd year associates now being allowed to goldscrot as well?
24,
Confirmed. I’ve found they’re a tremendous substitute for zen meditation balls.
-Secretary, Cold on the Roof
Fuck me!
Today keeps gettin’ worse and fuckin’ worse.
Now I hear dat a fuckin’ washed-up tennis playa wit a fuckin’ wig and a fuckin’ crank habit is sellin’ more books den me!!!
Dis country is goin’ to hell.
-cg
Moot point. Greg Zuckerman rules.
27 = zuckerman because no one else would leave such a pointless comment.
In the list that counts, the “NY Times Bestseller” list, Gaspo 8, Sorkin 9. Suck my ARS!
-Head of CG Fan Club
My god all the gasparino jokes have gotten lame.
@30 then don’t read them
@29:
Thanks, pal. “Pinch” Sulzberger is a friend-a-mine.
-cg
At long last, what is your fascination with this pogue?
Anybody still interested in my battles with Lloyd? Anyone? (Except illegal Mexicans….)
~L. Dobbs
Nutcase, NY
OMG. Look at what someone who goes by YeastInfection wrote on the DailyBeast about Chazzy Gassy or as she/he calls him “Gossiparino”. I had no idea he was so underhanded.
Per the Yeaster, this is priceless: Consider the following about the above author, Mr. Self Promotion. While he appears to take some pride in initially appearing at #8 in the NY Times Best Seller List, this is merely a smoke screen for CNBC promoting his book. Reality is setting in as we speak. Can you imagine if Sorkin had such publicity (he is at #9, he has no such promotion, and his ranking is not the function of a debut). In the Amazon rankings, Gossiparino has now declined into the 90′s and will likely fall from the top 100 list this week – only a couple of weeks into his book “humping” exploits. All this while the skinny little author/reporter he hates most is still in the teens after months of success. Why, one must ask. Because, just like the above article, the Sellout sucks. It is filled with inuendo instead of fact. His sources play him like a fiddle. His knowledge of the underlying subject of finance is sophomoric, at best. And, did I mention that his conclusions are all wrong because he is fundamentally stupid? As one of the 14 reviews on his book concluded: “Gasbag has now written more books than he has read”.
Speaking of said reviews, he is doing everything he can to make this piece of crap book appear to smell like a rose. His limited number of positive reviews includes one from his wife and another from his attorney and still others from former business associates. Honest reviewers see his work as a waste of paper and a hazard to the environment.
Woooo. Not that is nasty there Yeasty!
@4 Amen
@Lloydus-Your wife never sees them.