Let’s hear it, bank CEOs, each and every one of you: “On this Thanksgiving Day, we are grateful to… the hedge funds.”
You know all that money you’ve raised to help pay the government back and to cover all of those catastrophic losses? Well, it seems that a big, fat chunk of it came from hedge funds. About 40% of it, according to Morgan Stanley.
Now, we know this is going to make the gravy come out through the nose for some of you. More than a handful of you–some still employed, even–cursed the hedge funds up and down for shorting your shares and driving down your stock price. But $80 billion is nothing to sneeze at, and you’re going to need many more hedge fund billions to dig out from this mess.
And so, Vikram, Ken, John, Lloyd, all of you (except perhaps for Jamie Dimon), a toast to the hedge funds.
Hedge Funds May Account for 40% of Bank Capital, Report Says [Bloomberg]
64A One of American banking’s Big Four, for short (4)
@1 Citi.
Citi used to be a Funhouse
But now it’s full of no talent ass clowns
It’s time to continue the SIV writedowns
Losses are gonna burn it down, down, down
@1, i bet you are the only one to laugh at your “jokes”.
that was me
-biff
@2 thanks, fits.
@2/Naked I love, L-O-V-E that song, especially the parts when she counts but I totally had no idea it was about subprime though. Pink is deep.
@6 – Yup, if you were to combine Pink’s counting plus the BEP’s ability to list days of the week…you’d have a killer song.
Both ARS’ and Gasparino’s books make essentially this point, that the CEOs of financial institutions in the weeks leading up to last Thanksgiving Day were busy (a) talking out of one side of their mouths about the eeeevil short selling hedge funds who were the cause of their plunging stock prices and (b) using the other side of the mouth for begging the said hedge funds to pleeeeeze, pleeeeze, don’t take your business away from our prime brokerage department! “We need you to keep short selling so we can keep locating the stocks for you.”
This forked-tongue trick must be very useful on Thanksgiving. Eating both the turkey and the cranberry sauce in one bite. Yuuuum.
@6&CL
You have to really pay attention to these lyrics, these women are brilliant. Gwen Stefani made me millions shorting the MBS market based on her 2005 market call in the hit song Holla Back Girl
A few times I’ve been around that track
And home price appreciation ain’t just gonna happen like that
Because they ain’t gonna pay the loan back, girl
They ain’t gonna pay the loan back, girl
This shit is bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S
Shazmut -
When Greg was young, he loved Thanksgiving so. Not because I was a great cook, or because we were joined by family and friends. No. It was because I let him shove a drumstick up his ass. All day long. You should try it.
Fondly,
Greg’s Mom
@Naked
Miley, Pink, Gwen…
Too teenybopper/10 years ago, examine your motives.