Mark Lowe, the Nomos Capital founder accused by former employee Jordan Wimmer of, among other things, trying to kill her (several times), hiring hookers to work as investor relations girls, forcing Wimmer to be present while he received lap dances, having an Asian fetish, and making dumb blonde jokes took the stand today to tell his side of the story. First off, he says the prosties he took on business trips were his girlfriends. Regarding his preference for the Asian persuasion (don’t worry about how this is relevant), Lowe responded that he prefers “women to wear less and show more flesh.” And as for the jokes? Mark said that he didn’t come up with them but merely passed them on and while we’re on the subject? As an arbiter of comedy he wouldn’t necessarily give the j’s super high marks, but thought they were definitely pretty decent. Also, he’s never put one his lady-friends in the trunk of a car, though now that you’ve put the idea in his head it’s definitely under consideration.
A selection of the emails Mr Lowe sent to Miss Wimmer and other women staff were read to Central London Employment Tribunal. One email from May 7, 2008, titled ‘Who is your real friend?’ read: ‘Put your dog and your girlfriend in the boot of your car for an hour and then see who is happy to see you.’ When asked by Alisdair Simpson, for Miss Wimmer, if he thought the joke was demeaning to women, Mr Lowe disagreed and said he thought it was ‘funny, but not especially’. Mr Simpson replied: ‘You don’t think putting your girlfriend in the boot of your car is demeaning?’ Mr Lowe said he had never put a girlfriend in the boot of a car, adding the joke was ‘not especially demeaning’. Lowe [also] said: ‘I thought they were funny. They weren’t brilliantly funny, but they amused me.’
Furthmore, does he not get credit for demonstrating enormous restraint here?
“These are very mild by comparison to some of the jokes I receive from business associates that I don’t forward.”
£100m hedge fund boss made ‘sexist, dumb blonde’ jokes in daily work emails [Daily Mail]
Hedge Fund Manager Mark Lowe Denies He Hired Escorts, Hit Man [Bloomberg]
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:04PM
Lose the floppy Palin collars
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:04PM
would not hit it.
Posted by CoveredLong , Nov 17, 2009 1:07PM
I too have seen that joke and agree with this evaluation:
‘I thought they were funny. They weren’t brilliantly funny, but they amused me.’
No I don't think the joke is demeaning to women, however I do think it's demeaning that he doesn't think it's demeaning, so there's that.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:10PM
palin is a dumb-shit
She keeps saying shit like: "truthishly I think"
Sounds like a Family Guy episode.
Some babe-reporter is going to nuke her again....
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:11PM
CAN HE TELL US THE JOKES HE DIDN'T FORWARD?
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:11PM
never put a woman in the trunk of a car? who is dis chump?
-cg
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:12PM
@4 palin is dumb?!?!
-forehead slapper
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:13PM
Mark,
I'm still waiting for a callback for the open IR position. Call me?
--Melissa Lee
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:14PM
so many hotter IR girls than this bitch.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:16PM
@9 throw some names out. I need new JO material.
Posted by CoveredLong , Nov 17, 2009 1:19PM
#2 = Mark Lowe's car.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:21PM
@11 not for lack of trying!
-ML's ride
Posted by fresno dan , Nov 17, 2009 1:21PM
"...hiring hookers to work as investor relations girls, forcing Wimmer to be present while he received lap dances, having an Asian fetish, and making dumb blonde jokes..."
You say that, as if it were bad.
Posted by Effective Date , Nov 17, 2009 1:22PM
she kinda looks like anna farris in the pic
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:23PM
@13 no, Jordan did
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:23PM
I would love to be this man's love slave.
-ping j
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:26PM
She looks so constipated in that picture.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:27PM
@14 she looks like toni collette in another picture
Posted by CoveredLong , Nov 17, 2009 1:27PM
@12 - Seriously, she must be really good at Frogger.
-ML
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:29PM
when she sits down, I bet she leaves a high watermark.
Posted by pfluger , Nov 17, 2009 1:29PM
I think she looks like Paris Hilton.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:30PM
I still want to know how she made over half a million pounds a year.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:30PM
P.S. Your c#nt is in the sink.
M. Funkhauser
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:30PM
@10=hilarious
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:31PM
I swear that I saw this girl on Freeones...
Posted by ML , Nov 17, 2009 1:33PM
I second 10. Let's get a list of the hottest IR girls b/c this one is giving them a bad name, and I have an opening
Posted by Anal_yst , Nov 17, 2009 1:36PM
@13
Wait, there's funds that DON'T hire hookers for IR positions?
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:45PM
Looks like a discount Anna Ferris
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:46PM
@28 only in this pic
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:52PM
What do you get when a naked blonde stands on her head? A brunette with bad breath.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:54PM
i was going to say @20 FTW until I saw @30....
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 1:58PM
How could she possibly think the joke was demeaning when, clearly, it is far too nuanced for her to understand? As a juror, I would disqualify this attempt at evidence.
Posted by Perkins Maxwell , Nov 17, 2009 2:03PM
Bess LOVES dumb blonde jokes. For an obvious reason.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 2:07PM
@33 what the hell are you talking about? pretty sure she's never made one on db.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 2:07PM
@30 uh, gross.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 2:11PM
14/18/28:
Anna Faris meets Tonya Harding.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 2:12PM
Allow me to rule in this matter. Sexually oriented jokes or jokes about the sexes require exceptional knowledge of one's audience to reduce the risk of credibility and career damaging litigation.
For example, if Mr. Lowe accidentaly got his expensive suited "package" stuck in an elevator door while Ms. Wimmer was present, that would be hilariously funny and Ms. Wimmer would have recounted the story to staff and friends time and time again. No harm or foul there. Also, suppose Mr. Lowe got chalk powder on the front of his pants and was furiously trying to beat off the powder when Ms. Wimmer chanced upon him? Again, slapstick in the workplace is incredibly humorous and no harm or foul is noted.
If Mr. Lowe had confidence issues and put a rolled up sock in the back of his pants as opposed to the front, would Ms. Wimmer be at risk of proposing a demeaning comment if she offered the information on where to correctly place the aforementioned rolled up sock?
Things could escalate however and such shennanigans must be nipped in the bud. If Mr. Lowe made an untoward or tiring sexist comment, Ms. Wimmer could have said, "I know your name is Mark but may I call you Dick?" which would have alerted Mr. Lowe to a potential problem in the workplace.
Clearly, the slow witted Mr. Lowe did not know his audience and that the venue for an unknown audience can be a courtroom.
Sincerely,
The Joke Briefer
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 2:13PM
Where is Spencer? Am i the only one who thinks she's a dead-ringer for Heidi Montag/Pratt?
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 2:16PM
Three blondes are in an elevator when the elevator suddenly stops and the lights go out. They try using their cell phones to get help, but have no luck. Even the phones are out.
After a few hours of being stuck with no help in sight, one blonde says to the others "I think the best way to call for help is by yelling together."
The others agree with the first, so they all inhale deeply and begin to yell loudly "Together!, together!, together!"
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 2:17PM
The IR person for Handbridge Capital should be Honey Dejour, although she evidently would have filled Lowe's bill quite nicely as well.
Posted by Investorcluzo , Nov 17, 2009 2:17PM
funny how? funny like a clown? do I amuse you?
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 2:18PM
Q: Why was the blonde's belly button sore ?
A: Because her AIG quant boyfriend was blonde too.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 2:18PM
I am curious as to her bleached anus situation.
Greg
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 2:18PM
@39 that was awful. jesus.
Posted by pfluger , Nov 17, 2009 2:22PM
Wait a minute Joke Briefer.
Far be it for me to challenge your expertise on these matters, but...
He knew damned well that his audience was a hooker.
Apparently she didn't think anything of the jokes, until he wanted to put her in the trunk.
I don't think it was the jokes that set her off. Apparently she got upset with the threatened murder thing.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 2:24PM
@45 wimmer's not a hooker (not technically).
Posted by pfluger , Nov 17, 2009 2:32PM
@46, you're right of course.
But it doesn't change the point. He knew his audience, a receptionist who apparently had no problem with the hookers or dumb blonde jokes until that unfortunate moment when the guy allegedly threatened to put her into the boot.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 2:34PM
Mark Lowe: Never push a good thing too far.
~The Ghost of David Carradine
Posted by CoveredLong , Nov 17, 2009 2:34PM
Wimmer...more like LOSER!
@42 - That's redundant redundant.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 2:36PM
Did that Lowe guy ever work for Coastal States? That story brings back many old memories.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 2:47PM
Wasn't this broad in one of those pills to cure small dick syndrome infomercials?
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 2:49PM
@23 Are you done now? Why are you even here? Go sit in the bleachers.
Posted by oh dear , Nov 17, 2009 2:50PM
From TFA: "Mr Wilson [attorney for Ms Wimmer*] said the blonde joke was sent just after Ms Wimmer [complainant] had come out of psychiatric care, where she was treated for depression."
*not explicitly stated in Daily Mail article.
very good indeed. Grade "A" tribunal material, and most are nearly as silly.
Argument for claimant: "but he LOOKS like a sleazeball"
Arg for respondant: "stop it now, she's mad, and being mad is a critical admission central to her claim"
something like that.
What is this, we have to write the stories here too?
http://dilbert.com/fast/2009-11-17/
see what i mean?
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 2:53PM
I see the blond TV and say, fuck, it IS oscar wilde
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 2:53PM
@53 what the hell are you rambling about?
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 3:00PM
@55 - Its never a good thing to be pinched on the nose by a lobster while going down on a woman of class.
see what i mean?
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 3:02PM
Do you think there's still an available position at this firm? BBG me if so.
-- Alicia Wetmore.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 3:08PM
"IT AINT MY FAULT!"
"Did I do that?"
"IT AINT MY FAULT!"
"Did I do that?"
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 3:09PM
She looks like the defiant/vulnerable/masochist type. Please, please, beat me, beat me, just don't kill me, okay, okay, kill me.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 3:17PM
That wasn't a joke, it was another death threat, like those she experienced walking down King's Road. Blonde in a trunk. He was implying dead, right? Guilty!
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 3:39PM
At last! A guy rappin about blunts and broads, tits and bras, menages-a-trois, sex in expensive cars.
Posted by Eliot S. , Nov 17, 2009 3:52PM
@60, there was no death threat. The joke implied that the dog/blonde would be alive when you came to retrieve.
Joke Briefer, she IS a hooker and realized that with so many unemployed young women in the City area, she was bound to be sent packing. Thus the lawsuit. Trust me, I know hookers.
@4, babe-reporter? Is Katie Couric (slavic for cunt) reading the DB now?
Posted by volatilitysmile , Nov 17, 2009 4:26PM
wow, just the uplifting story we all need before the 70% off sale season statrs.
Off the record, I could get used to the lifestyle she enjoyed. what exactly was the value she added to the team all this time she was getting paid half a milly? Pounds!
Posted by volatilitysmile , Nov 17, 2009 4:28PM
a million girls would kill for that job...
that's all.
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 5:07PM
why is this site so anti women? great job bess!
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 5:07PM
why is this site so anti women? great job bess!
Posted by guest , Nov 17, 2009 5:09PM
@65/66 yeah dude, it's totally bess's fault that a bunch of testosterone driven males might make sexist statements. did you read the post? it mocks Lowe.
Posted by thebestguest , Nov 18, 2009 11:12AM
These hotties aren't hookers, but they are looking for husbands:
http://tinyurl.com/ydj3aff
Free to oogle the photos, sign up to score a hottie! Yowza!
Posted by guest , Nov 23, 2009 1:55PM
@19 The new bonus, your bloomberg will be loaded with "Dirty pretty things, play Frogger, Online! Sizzzlin!