Opening Bell: 11.17.09

ubs bank.jpgUBS Outlines Path To Profit (WSJ)
“We are on track, we have stabilized UBS’s financial condition but we still have some serious topics to address,” Mr. Grübel told investors. First order of business– we’re going to have to come up with some new and inventive tax evasion strategies. The IRS seems to be on to us.
It’s the Juggernaut, Bitch! (Bloomberg)
Origins of nicknames: “People who know [new head of the Citadel investment banking unit] Patrik Edsparr describe him as outspoken, with a forceful personality. He earned the nickname “juggernaut” during his first job at Lehman Brothers Holdings Inc., where one of his tasks in the research unit was to collect daily price data from senior traders, one of the people said. Most of his predecessors failed because they were too intimidated to interrupt the traders, who would shout at them. Edsparr would stand behind them, often for up to two hours, until they gave him the data.
Soros Fund Management Holdings Increase (Reuters)
$6.2 billion, up $2 billion, after taking a stake in Ford.
America’s Newest Land Baron: FDIC (WSJ)
The current backlog of property stuck on the agency’s books, with an appraised value of $1.8 billion, ranges from an $18,700 clapboard home with stained carpets in Birmingham, Ala., to a $1.7 million mountainside lodge with a heated driveway in Steamboat Springs, Colorado.
Facebook Verb Named English Word of the Year (Reuters)
Don’t want to live in a world where ‘unfriend’ is recognized as a real verb? Then you’re gonna need to kill yourself now.
Paul Allen Diagnosed With Lymphoma (NYT)
“This is tough news for Paul and the family,” wrote Allen’s sister Jody. “Paul is feeling O.K. and remains upbeat. He continues to work and he has no plans to change his role at Vulcan. His health comes first, though, and we’ll be sure that nothing intrudes on that.”
Audit Faults New York Fed in A.I.G. Bailout (NYT)
The Fed “refused to use its considerable leverage,” Neil M. Barofsky wrote in a report to be officially released on Tuesday, examining the much-criticized decision to make A.I.G.’s trading partners whole when people and businesses were taking painful losses in the financial markets.


Comments (15)

  1. Posted by guest | November 17, 2009 at 8:10 AM

    that’s a pretty sweet nickname.

  2. Posted by guest | November 17, 2009 at 8:12 AM

    no one unfriends the juggernaut

  3. Posted by guest | November 17, 2009 at 8:15 AM

    Then am I the only one who says defriend?

  4. Posted by DJ LIBOR | November 17, 2009 at 8:16 AM

    Does he have the good or the bad Hodgkin’s?

  5. Posted by guest | November 17, 2009 at 8:16 AM

    @1/@2 you suck
    The real news of the day is: UBS Sucks even more.

  6. Posted by guest | November 17, 2009 at 8:17 AM

    Goldman sucks, the French suck, but… UBS doesn’t suck!
    “UBS, of Switzerland, alone offered to give a break to the New York Fed in the negotiations last November over how to keep A.I.G. from toppling and taking other banks down with it. It would have accepted 98 cents on the dollar.”

  7. Posted by guest | November 17, 2009 at 8:26 AM

    I’m considering a position at Citadel but reading and hearing all the horror stories I may have to rethink this …
    I’d appreciate some insight.

  8. Posted by guest | November 17, 2009 at 8:28 AM

    Paul has had a deserved and good life. I wish him the best.

  9. Posted by guest | November 17, 2009 at 8:36 AM

    6=AIG quant.

  10. Posted by guest | November 17, 2009 at 8:50 AM

    @7 – Never mind.
    KG

  11. Posted by guest | November 17, 2009 at 9:13 AM

    @7 what “horror stories” do you speak of?
    -kg

  12. Posted by pfluger | November 17, 2009 at 9:14 AM

    I’m in a bad fuckin’ mood dis morning. Dat fucking Andre Agassi book is doin’ better den mine on da fuckin’ Amazon best seller list. And so is dat Glen Beck book, and dat milf’s book.
    I guess I just gotta come to terms with da fact dat genius is often misunderstood.
    -cg

  13. Posted by guest | November 17, 2009 at 11:34 AM

    TGFD’s favorite quote about my favorite commercial bank…
    “Goldman’s a giant vampire stealing trillions with ‘gangster economics.’”
    BTW, TGFD was saying just last week that Goldman and the two French banks should never have been made whole through AIG’s use of gov’t funds.
    Looks like the auditor thinks the same thing.
    Makes no difference, though. obama has no plans to reform Wall Street. None at all. Goldman’s happy. God must be happy too.
    The Guy from Delaware

  14. Posted by Anal_yst | November 17, 2009 at 12:50 PM

    @TGFD
    Don’t blame Wall Street because we have inept, captured, lazy regulators; the banks are just doing their job to maximize shareholder value. Put your ire aside and think clearly for a change.

  15. Posted by guest | November 17, 2009 at 6:02 PM

    UBS has expressed this “mission statement” in 15 different ways for the past 20 years of my career. The place is a failure starting with disorganized, corrupt and political, senior management.

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