gasparino.jpgAs you may have heard, the numbers have been crunched and to some people’s surprise, Andrew Sorkin’s book, Too Big To Fail, bests Charlie Gasparino’s When Mooks Fail for the number of times the word ‘fuck’ is mentioned, overall and per page. Sorkin’s got 20 (.03/page) and CG has 10 (.02/page). To some, this was shocking, given what they think they know of Chaz, though not to those of us who know that a) Gaspo runs a “classy operation” and b) that the auteur was nervous the Pulitzer committee would be skittish about awarding a prize to someone with a filthy mouth.


Charlie told Business Insider that he attributes the lack of fucks, compared to Sorkin, to the fact that he did more aggressive fact checking (ex: he was told Fink used the term “mother-fucker” during a tense meeting last year, but in checking out the quote, was told by Larry that the BlackRock founder, as a rule, never sticks a mother in front of a fucker). Still, not wanting to disappoint his legions of fans, or give the impression he’s gone soft, CG reminded us that while he may drop less f-bombs than ARS, his book “has Jimmy Cayne jerking off” and possibly use of the term ‘cocksucker’ though he can’t recall on which page so you’ll have to buy the book to find out. (To be fair, rumor has it Sorkin’s book was thisclose to including Tim Geithner giving out HJs in the second floor men’s room of the NY Fed but it was taken out due to vehement protesting by TG’s handlers.)

Comments (27)

  1. Posted by guest | November 16, 2009 at 12:41 PM

    Nothing like starting lunch with a BL article.
    Thx Bess

  2. Posted by guest | November 16, 2009 at 12:43 PM

    oh yeah? well I gave hank paulson a hand job with my mouth. eat it, bitch.
    -ars

  3. Posted by JT | November 16, 2009 at 12:43 PM

    So much funnier then what TBI wrote on this topic! What would we do with out you Bess.

  4. Posted by pfluger | November 16, 2009 at 12:46 PM

    I am already working on my next book. It will be an autobiography.
    -cg

  5. Posted by guest | November 16, 2009 at 12:51 PM

    having to read about jimmy cayne jerking off would be a reason for me to NOT by a book, thanks.

  6. Posted by guest | November 16, 2009 at 12:53 PM

    2 ft(disturbed)w

  7. Posted by guest | November 16, 2009 at 12:54 PM

    why am I the butt of every joke?
    -TG

  8. Posted by Investorcluzo | November 16, 2009 at 12:58 PM

    bess proves her love of chazzy – picture of no sleeves on an article about ARS…at a minimum we should have side by side shots like they do in boxing.

  9. Posted by guest | November 16, 2009 at 12:58 PM

    Too Gasparino, am not/wasn’t/will not ever be interested

  10. Posted by guest | November 16, 2009 at 1:02 PM

    I gots one word for yas……indefatigable. Yeah, dats right.
    CG

  11. Posted by Henry Miller | November 16, 2009 at 1:08 PM

    .02 “fucks” per page? Lifeless prigs.

  12. Posted by NakedShort | November 16, 2009 at 1:12 PM

    I have a B.A. from DeVry, I was nominated for the Pulitzer Prize in beat reporting in 2002, I have been awarded citations from seven business journalism boards in New York, and I am never, ever sick after one of my famous 72 hour martini benders. So I ask you; when someone flips on the TV and they fall on their knees and they pray to God that someone out there has THE scoop over who is taking over at Bank of America or that their bank isnt about liqudated by the FDIC or that their CEO doesn’t suffer acute neural trama from dropping too much acid, who do you think they’re praying to? Now, go ahead and read your Bible, Andrew, and you go to your snobby Upper West Side apartment, and, with any luck, you might win some douchey journalism award, but if you’re looking for God, he was at Elaine’s double fisting Black Haus schnapps on November 17, and he doesn’t like to be told that he did NOT write the definitive tell all book of the financial crisis. You ask me if I have a God complex. Let me tell you something: I am God.
    -Charles Gasparino

  13. Posted by Tax Chick | November 16, 2009 at 1:16 PM

    Somebody had their Wheaties this morning! Nice job, Naked!

  14. Posted by guest | November 16, 2009 at 1:18 PM

    @cluzo how is this about ars? it was 50/50 and then 75/25 w the cg quote.

  15. Posted by guest | November 16, 2009 at 1:23 PM

    Wow N/S, i have to agree. Impressive indeed. This guy is a total joke, I hope to see him out sometime so I can tell him that hes a gigantic tool.

  16. Posted by guest | November 16, 2009 at 1:27 PM

    Well… fuck.
    -C. Gasparino

  17. Posted by guest | November 16, 2009 at 1:30 PM

    which one has maria blowing a goat? that’s the one I’m buying.

  18. Posted by Anal_yst | November 16, 2009 at 1:35 PM

    @15
    He’s actually pretty fun in person, at least when I met him, was impressed, really.

  19. Posted by guest | November 16, 2009 at 1:50 PM

    @12, Ask God how many shots of Bourbon he had before getting on-air this morning

  20. Posted by Charlie Runkle | November 16, 2009 at 2:02 PM

    Erin looking so hot in red today…
    There’s a stirring in my loins.

  21. Posted by guest | November 16, 2009 at 2:17 PM

    20 – Erin Burnett is the Ryan Seacrest of financial journalism.

  22. Posted by guest | November 16, 2009 at 2:24 PM

    Consecutive DB “suck” and “fuck” posts and nothing about the Anal Quartet, Bernie, Barney, Timmy, and Zvi?

  23. Posted by guest | November 16, 2009 at 2:27 PM

    @22 what’s your point?

  24. Posted by guest | November 16, 2009 at 2:31 PM

    which one has Barney blowing me? that’s the one I’m buying.
    -Dennis Kneale

  25. Posted by guest | November 16, 2009 at 4:12 PM

    he looks so regal…gabagool

  26. Posted by guest | November 16, 2009 at 8:21 PM

    @23, Bend over and you’ll get the point.

  27. Posted by NotNasser | November 17, 2009 at 10:26 AM

    If ya never stops ya never gets da hangover, right doc?

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