The French will simply not be outdone on matters of making Europe the most inhospitable place on earth to be a banker. Fresh from declaring victory over the wicked Anglo-Saxons and their lasseiz-faire banking cabal, France now says it, too, will impose a huge one-time tax on banking bonuses, just like the British said they’d do last week.
French Finance Minister Christine Lagarde said that they, too, would take half of what the banks pay their employees this Christmas, thank you. The move is no surprise, given the Wall Street Journal op-ed from a few weeks ago where British Prime Minister Gordon Brown and le Petit Napoleon, French President Nicolas Sarkozy, called a one-off tax on banking bonuses “a priority, due to the fact that bonuses for 2009 have arisen partly because of government support for the banking system.”
Archive for December 2009
In The Event Of An Emergency, Let Andy Madoff Lovingly Wrap Your Knick Knacks In Bubble Paper
By Bess Levin
Last week we lamented the fact that it’s been difficult for former Madoff employees to find new jobs, in the wake of their boss admitting his business was a Ponzi scheme. Our heart bled for two in particular: Mark and Andy Madoff. They’ve really had a rough go of it. So far all they’ve encountered are No’s and Mark has cried during interviews. There were rumors that Andy was considering starting “a firm involved in disaster recovery” but we figured he’d sooner take up with the fish, never to be heard from again. Turns out, maybe not! Supposedly Andy and his girlfriend, Catherine Hooper, have started Black Umbrella, a company that “builds practical, efficient disaster plans for individuals, couples and families,” in the event of a disaster, be it natural or of the financial variety. Sign up today!
It’s been a profitable week for Little Tim Geithner and the Treasury boys. Hot on the heels of the news that it’s getting its money back from those deadbeats at Citigroup and Wells Fargo comes its successful sale of those zero-cost warrants it got from TCF Financial Corp., a Minnesota bank.
The Treasury turned a tidy $9.45 million profit on the TCF warrants, getting twice the minimum bid price of $1.50 apiece in a Dutch auction. The warrants don’t expire for another nine years, during which time TCF’s share price only has to rise $3.50 to make them worth exercising.
Yea, it’s a drop in the bucket. Yea, there’s still $60 billion in TARP money outstanding. But let’s give this one to the little guy. He’s already been overshadowed–not difficult, we understand–by Big Ben’s big win and fancy Time magazine cover. But for the first time in a long time, it hasn’t been a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad week for the Treasury Secretary. As of Wednesday morning, anyway.
$$$ Madoff man DiPascali assisted in 3 arrests [Reuters]
$$$ Vegas Condo Buyer: “It’s Really Gonna Be OK” [CNBC]
$$$ Credit Suisse May Pay $536 Million in Settlement [Bloomberg]
$$$ Hermitage Capital Management Sergei Magnitsky Tribute:
Because, remember, his research was so damn good he had no reason to insider trade. Nevertheless:
A federal grand jury charged Raj Rajaratnam with five counts of conspiracy and six counts of securities fraud related to the insider-trading case involving hedge fund Galleon Group. The grand jury also charged Danielle Chiesi, a former consultant to New Castle Partners LLC, with three counts of conspiracy and seven counts of securities fraud.—WSJ
Looking for ideas on where to blow your bonus money? In the market for something fast, Italian, and super dirty? Consider Jeffrey Epstein’s 2003 Ferrari 575M Maranello. Cityfile reports the massage enthusiast is selling it, via a friend, for $159,000–gotta free up some cash, the girls who won’t talk don’t come cheap, and we can’t have anymore humiliating details going public (ixnay egg-ay haped-say enis-pay). It only has 5,000 miles and the price is presumably negotiable. Make him an offer!
Goldman Sachs is being sued by Security Police and Fire Professionals of America Retirement Fund, an investor in GS. According to the Village People, the bank is going to “blindly reward” its directors with profits that were not made through “hard work” and had “nothing to do with the skill of the company’s employees,” but merely the generosity of the US taxpayer. This seems unfair because 1) did they not see the news that in a huge display of nothing but love for the people, Lloyd and his back-up dancers, the Golden Scrots, will be receiving no cash bonuses this year??? and 2) please don’t diminish the many hours Goldman employees spent crafting the perfect saddle on which to take turns riding Tim Geithner around the trading floor. Talking like hundreds of dozens here.
Yesterday, lawyers for Raj Rajaratnam once again asked for their client’s bail to be reduced (from $100 million to $20 million), and that the $7 million in cash posted several months back be returned to its rightful owner (the big man). Why? Because Raj-Raj is being treated unfairly. Is he a criminal? For sure. You’re god damn right he is. But is he in the same league as Bernie Madoff? No sir, and Raj/Raj’s representation doesn’t appreciate being treated as such. First off, Berns was screwing his investors, from start to finish. Whereas Raj? Did what he did for his investors. When Bernie went down, he left his investors high and dry. Raj? He’s been making it his biz-nass to maximize those returns, just like he’s always done. Madoff employees? They got fucked. Galleon employees? Raj has spent many sleepless nights writing letters of recommendation attesting to their unparalleled skills in the field. Raj: plays the air sitar. Berns: no air sitar. So this is fucking bullshit, and everybody knows it.
Nouriel Roubini was named one of GQ’s Men of the Year, which is nice, but what he’d really like is a special lady friend who will put up with his crazy, doom-filled schedule. Vagina carvings are cool, as is the touch of a young actor in his prime, but they apparently start to get old. Ben Kunkel reports:
Being a “work-alcoholic” (another Roubini-ism) takes a toll on his social life. The gossip blog Gawker, noting that Roubini– in the midst of a recession!– had allowed himself to be photographed in the company of younger women, labeled him a “playboy economist.” In fact, his romantic life seems almost notable for its near nonexistence. When we went to a dinner party one night, he joked that I was his first date in four months. During a period last year, he taught at NYU on Tuesday evenings and typically took a light out of the country each Wednesday, to return on Sunday evening. This left him Monday evenings. “I would meet a woman, she would say, ‘What,’ I am only good enough for a Monday?’ ”
“You could have said Monday was the new Friday,” I offered.
“For me it was the only Friday.”
“You can’t even have a pet,” I said.
“It would die,” he confirmed.
So! The Doctor needs a one night a week woman, or a hooker. Until then, he’ll have to settle for up close and personal time with a Hungarian billionaire, who doesn’t even notice when Doom has been working out.
Jamie with the Dimon family sheltie, Chippy. [Last Man Standing via BusinessInsider]
According to Institutional Investor, yes (Lloyd Blankfein, Gary Cohn, David Heller, and Richard Friedman, who the magazine insinuates has some job security in the fact that his wife is a gal-pal of Laura Blankfein). Also included, Jamie Dimon, obviously, who beats out LB for slot number one, Bob Diamond (4), Brady Dougan (5; really?), Tom Montag (7), Jes Staley (11) and everyone’s favorite milkshake lover, Ken Griffin (bringing up the rear at 25).
