This may be something you don’t want to hear but needs to be said: god bless Eliot Spitzer. Yes, the disgraced former governor has no power of any kind anymore, or the ability to persecute Wall Streets wrongdoers (the thing he used to get off most on, even more so than illicit tail). That much is obvious. He’s got every reason to hide under the covers or, on good days, make it to the couch and tuck in for a full day of trashy programming and yelling at whoever’s appearing on Maury. And nobody would begrudge him for feeling bad for himself, because wouldn’t you, if you’d fallen so far? And yet. He will not give you the satisfaction of seeing his tears, or how much this is killing him. That’s right– the noted hooker fucker is not only putting on his black socks, but his brave face too. Because who needs the governorship, or a bid for the presidency, when you’ve got not only a gig with Slate, but sassy quips as well?
THE making of New Year’s resolutions is, at once, the most optimistic and cynical of acts. The vow to change posits a continuing faith in human improvement (“I’ll lose 30 pounds this year”), but the format, a checkable mental list, is so tyrannical and skeptical of success that it often leads to failure (“Yeah, well, maybe 20.”) [...] So we asked some prominent New Yorkers to muse aloud not on their own ambitions for the year ahead but on our collective objectives. What might knit New York together in 2010? What should be its goals, its boundaries, its promises to improve, and change, and grow?
Eliot Spitzer, 50
Former governor, attorney general
I would love to see investment bankers actually do God’s work.
New York’s Resolutions [NYT]
These tits never get old.
you cut me so bad.
-LB
Put on some aviators and all these ho's look the same.
TW
great start to the new year/decade
I would like to insert my man spear into one of her many openings.
UVA grad
TITS !!!
I see some!
http://i44.tinypic.com/11kfp1f.jpg
Doing that….EVEN AS I TYPE THIS!
dream on – she's all mine !
Levs,
I love that you're the Elie Wiesel of Spitzer-gate. Either via photograph (Cans McGee) or title (Noted Hooker Fucker): Le'olam al tishkach.
u think that's a cock ring holding those pillows together?
@9 exclusives cost extra you cheapskate. You can go around saying that when I see the Jag, the condo, and the $25k/mo allowance
She makes riots break out among the oppressed masses of my groin.
~H. Chavez
Yershitsmine, Venezuela
Nice line, Steamroller Nine. I would like to see Attorneys General do God's Work, and actually prosecute crimes in a courtroom, rather than in the media. But your record there was poor.
Maybe you can do God's Work as Comptroller.
I resolve to wrap it up next time
-E
What the hell is God's work, Mr. Spitzer? Maybe Lloyd can help out.
God's work = pounding your secretary in the ass before lunch.
Lloyd Lloyd
Put the bankers in an electrical closet!!!!
Yarr!!
Mike L.
Lubbock, TX
Doing God's work, aka separating fools from their money. Banksters do that every day, what's the spitz yappin about?
LE'OLAM AL TISHKECHI
as Bessums is a girl, according to my, ahem, sources.
@20 – is that that hot new language spoken by those hot new blue people?
How do you say, "Cleveland Bowtie" in the Avatar language?
note to bess et al.- drury's shirt is see-through.
23- tee hee
Even worse is Schwarzman's suggestion. Foreigners not pay taxes? Fuck those soccer jersey wearing assholes. They can suck my circumsized cock.
Bess,
She looks familiar.
Tiger
dream on – she’s all mine !