So, remember the “sex-robot” we posted about not too long ago? It was mildly amusing when we thought that “Mature Martha,” one of the doll’s five personalities was a self-described “Cantor Fitzgerald bond trader with 7 years experience.” You know, just some slutty finance chick looking for a good time. It’s less hilarious when we were informed that Martha’s friend– “Frigid Farah”– is programmed to say stuff like “9/11 was an inside job,” “All the Jews got the call,” “I am an Anglo so I didn’t get the call,” and “I remember dying…ten thousand tons of molten steel and jet fuel crashing down on me…I remember my family… I had two daughters.” So unless you’re a necrophilia-loving, anti-Semitic, 9/11 conspiracy theorist, who also has a thing for screwing inanimate objects (there probably is a small, probably impotent market)…I’m gonna say take a pass on this one.
Cantor Fitzgerald “Sex Robot” Maker Actually Horrible Anti-Semitic 9/11 Conspiracy Theorist
By Bess Levin — Advertisement —
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- Use the Bloomberg command
NH BLG_DEALBREAKER <GO>
to access Dealbreaker
Now I am confused.
@1 about whether or not that's something you're interested in?
What. the. Fuck.
Must be some fired programmer's "fuck you" to the company.
As for the market: Pat Buchanan, David Duke, Jimmy Cayne, and the entire leadership of Hamas placed preorders, so half your market is filled already.
I hate to say it but he is right. We did know, I mean we told the Clinton Administration several times and he didnt do shit. We didnt get a call but we called it.
Now transfer those Gitmo guys to Chicago and lets get this terrorist thing under control…
-NY Jew
"I promised myself I would create a program to store his personality, and that became the foundation for Roxxxy True Companion."
So not only are you fucking someone who died on September 11th, you're also fucking a MALE bond trader? Ping Jiang sounds like the only dude who could keep hard through that.
Fembots stopped being cool long before Austin Powers 2.
She ain't Liz Hurley either.
Pass.
That option doesn't sound very attractive.
Just effing incredible to hear the "Farah" comments via the "informed" link above. I thought BL was making that stuff up until I heard it for myself. Just. Effing. Incredible.
@9 are you fucking nuts? why the hell would bess make that up? also, who cares whether it's an "informed" link or not, as it provides the actual video.
Can someone puh-lease explain why there are so many Bess sycophants who feel the need to defend Bess' honor every time some poor poster dares to question Bess or her motives, let alone mock her?
Bess is a big girl, she's proven the ability to handle herself, so can all the posers puh-lease STFU.
"puh-lease "
stopped reading right there.
@10
Probably because there are many 'made up' lines that are inserted into posts to entertain the reader…
-not 9
Sorry, but that's fucked up on many different levels.
Yep, bess won't fuck you so give it a rest.
Bess is mine.
–Snake plissken
-not 11
@13 uh, and you think bess would find an anti-semitic, 9/11 conspiracy theorist fuck toy amusing?
hello?
@17
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Irony
"Bess is a big girl" – what do you know that we don't?
Remember dat robot in da movie "Alien," da one dat went fuckin' nuts and tried to kill Ripley wit da fuckin' newpaper? Remember when da robot fell apart and den all-a-da white shit started oozin' outta its neck and arms and shit?
Well my fuckin' robot did da exact same thing da other day. I called da manufacturer and dey told me dat I had to drain da fuckin' robot of my fluids after each use, or else it would fill up and fuckin' explode.
I guess I shoulda read da instructions and taken my Marie in for service every six months.
Wow a shocking comment that completely destroys the narrative was captured on a Youtube posted by SomethingAwful Videos. This has never happened before. It's not like SA.com is notorious for its flying penis invasions of Second Life or anything.
This is such lazy reporting as to likely void your press defenses against a libel suit.
Are we now going to see WWN or Onion headlines posted as serious comments?
It moved, a lot.
@21 What in the fuck are you talking about? That part of the clip was in the original Sun article, but was taken out very quickly, which was the only reason I linked to the version the other site had, so you could see it for yourself. It was originally brought to my attention by Cantor Fitzgerald which, as you could possibly assume, is not happy with the robot-maker, and is obviously taking legal action. Did you want me to not mention this somewhat important piece of the story?
@21 – You are about to have the worst day of your life.
@ Bess go get some woman. Fuck yeah!
Yeah, when I saw that name 'Cantor Fitzgerald' in the post this morning, that raised a yellow flag for me.
Reminds me of when I was a kid and I couldn't play with my Chinpokomon anymore.
This isn't the first time that I've wanted to nail a crazy anti-Semite
http://snltranscripts.jt.org/93/93tsavers.phtml
This has got to be one of the sickest, most effed-up things I've ever heard of. Wow. Hope Cantor sues this dude's ass off.
If you go to the "informed" link, the author of that blog-post has an update which seems to be saying that the anti-semitic remarks were not from the robot but were added later and that he had been duped.
I don't see why people are making such a big deal about the female anti-Semitic robot that spews 9/11 conspiracy theories when we elected the male model to be President.
@30 nah…listened to it…it's the same audio, not a hoax.
@ #12: LOL
"Just think about wife or girlfriend swapping without actually giving the person to someone else," Mr Hines said.
- yeah, cuz I sure would get jealous seeing someone fuck (or do whatever it is you do with these things) my robot girlfriend.
btw – Is Ass_ociate Anal_yst's protege? coworker?
@34: Maybe my understanding of robotics is limited, but I think the idea was that your wife/gf would not be jealous if you fuck the robot on the side, as long as its purely a sex thing, and not love.
this story went from funny to disturbing
@32, how would know whether the audio was a hoax added after the fact or was legitimately something said by the robot just by listening to it? Do you know the robot well enough to recognize her voice? Are these the sort of things the robot,in your expeience, says all the time?
This is quite clearly a hoax perpetrated by a truther who found the story on the Sun website via the Cantor Fitzgerald reference. It's impossible for me to believe that the Sun would post this video with these bizarre statements in them and then not once comment on those statements which are the most sensational aspect of the story. You'd have to be a retard to fall for this.
@37 wait, really? it did?
-foreheadslapper
Yep, bess won’t fuck you so give it a rest.
Bess is mine.
–Snake plissken
-not 11
Hey Bess, nice rageaholic posting.
You'll note that your link now goes to a completely changed post which disclaims the validity of the video. From what I read the first time, he indicated that his Youtube link was to the exact same video as The Sun had used. The account that posted to Youtube was "SomethingAwful Videos", a big clue that it was a hoax.
You got trolled by SomethingAwful just like Chinese media confusing The Onion for a serious paper. Be more careful next time – SA lives for this kind of thing. Also, an apology would be nice.
Big Brain On@BB– nope, you're incorrect. So, sorry, you'll have to keep waiting on that apology.