February 2010

  • News

    Och-Ziff OZ Fund Returned 23.1% In ’09

    Och-Ziff, with $24 billion in aum, raked in $500 million during the past month and a half, with half being in capital inflows and half in performance-related appreciation. “The capital inflow cycle for the hedge fund industry has begun and our assets under management will grow over time.” Here are some highlights from Och’s SEC […]

    / Feb 11, 2010 at 1:47 PM
  • News

    Citi Pays Just As Well As Any Other Bank On The Street, Claims CFO

    Last week, Goldman Sachs management told an analyst that despite a lower than normal compensation ratio of 36% for 2009, they weren’t sweating people leaving the mothership because relative to everyone other bank on the Street, they’re still making it rain ka-ching! on people’s faces. Slightly arrogant, sure, but not necessarily untrue. Can this same […]

    / Feb 11, 2010 at 1:00 PM
  • News

    Elizabeth Warren: Will Anyone Be Doing Anything About The Impending CRE Sh*t Storm?

    Elizabeth Warren, head of the Congressional Oversight Panel for TARP, said in her monthly report that it would be nice if the government would wake up and do something about the commercial real estate losses yet to come, ’cause until they do, “the crisis will not end.” The “CRE is the next shit to hit […]

    / Feb 11, 2010 at 12:00 PM
  • News

    Are Chicks The Only Reason Anyone Cares About Bonuses?

    Would you gladly accept all-stock bonuses if you didn’t have to worry about RBS debt not impressing your girl (would-be wife or favorite Flashdancer)? This guy says yes. He also posits that in this world sans ladies (or sans the ladies who care about the size of your package), you people probably wouldn’t have gone […]

    / Feb 11, 2010 at 11:45 AM
  • News

    Opening Bell: 02.11.10

    Bloomberg Xs & O (NYP) Apparently Obama doesn’t love Dimon and Blankfein’s packages as much as Bloomberg would’ve had us believe. The White House claims the newswire took the Presidents statements out of context yesterday, and released a transcript of the interview, wherein he’d added, after saying all those nice things: “I do think that […]

    / Feb 11, 2010 at 9:00 AM
  • News

    Write-Offs: 02.10.10

    $$$ “We like to think of ourselves as a global exchange, not just a New York exchange,” said Ms. Mogavero. “There is no snowstorm in India right now, so we have to be open for those customers.” Everyone else can go home. Or not go home.[WSJ] $$$ AIG Plans Revamp [AIG] $$$ Bronx Man Looking […]

    / Feb 10, 2010 at 5:30 PM
  • News

    Las Vegas Ritz Shutting Down Due To Banker Bashing

    There’s been much talk about some bankers booking all of Wall Street surrounding area’s hotel rooms today, but if you want to be really charitable, just move your drunken asses from Stone Street’s bar stools and head to Vegas. The Ritz-Carlton, owned by a DB arm, is closing down, due to the “AIG-effect.” Maybe if […]

    / Feb 10, 2010 at 4:28 PM
  • News

    Just Putting It Out There: There Are Goldman Sachs Employees Sleeping At The Hotel Located Near Goldman Sachs Tonight

    So if you’ve been dying to sleep with a Master or Mistress of the Universe, and feel like you need a high concentration of them in one place in order to up your odds of scoring, knock on a bunch of doors at the Embassy Suites on Wall Street tonight. Eventually someone’s bound to let […]

    / Feb 10, 2010 at 3:52 PM
  • News

    Senator Larry?

    If it feels like the world is ending today it’s not because of a light dusting but rather that one DC resident is saying he has no problem whatsoever with Dimon and Blankfein’s bonuses, there was an earthquake in Chicago this morning and someone thinks Larry Kudlow could get elected to the Senate.

    / Feb 10, 2010 at 3:01 PM
  • News

    29 Year-Old Banker Attempts To Make Sense Of It All With Only One Hand Showing

    When one is struggling through something, trying to figure out how he got to where he stands, and the point of this called life, the best thing to do is sit down at some adorable little cafe in the West Village, not a Starbucks but one of those places that draws designs in the foam […]

    / Feb 10, 2010 at 2:28 PM
  • News

    Bove: Continued Banker Bashing Will Force Executives Into Playing For The NBA

    Good day for the Goldmanites and Dimonites of the world. Following Obama’s acknowledgement that the whole banker-hatin’ was just a joke, Dick Bove has issued a report noting that the thing Obama said about bankers and ball players and pay? He’s said it for years. I have constantly pointed out that one can make more […]

    / Feb 10, 2010 at 1:43 PM
  • News

    Bonus Watch ’10: Goldman Sachs

    Goldman CFO David Viniar said today that he has no “magic formula” for pay this year, and that it would depend on a number of factors, including the firm’s performance, competition and mostly “the world around us.”

    / Feb 10, 2010 at 12:52 PM
  • News

    Traders Who Commute Psyched For Opportunity To Spend The Night In The City, Momentary Respite From The Old Ball And Chain

    Bloomberg reports that not everyone is freaking out over the prospect of a little more snow and are in fact keeping fingers crossed they’ll be forced to tell the wife/husband they’re stranded for the night. ‘Cause that’s when the real party* gets started. Weather advisories calling for as much as 20 inches of snow prompted […]

    / Feb 10, 2010 at 12:41 PM
  • News

    Happy Birthday, Lenny Dykstra *And* Jim Cramer

    That’s right ladies– the former friends share a date of birth, albeit different years. Cramer is turning 55 and Dykstra 47. I’m not sure what JC has to celebrate this year so let’s focus on Nails who’s turned it around just in time for the big day.

    / Feb 10, 2010 at 11:54 AM
  • News

    Hooters For Sale, Those Morally Opposed To Food Eating Contests Need Not Apply

    Great news for those of you who love delicious wings served in tank-tops: Hooters is on the block. The restaurant needs cash, ASAP, and analysts are guesstimating it could probably be yours for about $250 million. There may be a few issues for you to deal with upon acquiring the place, namely getting rid of […]

    / Feb 10, 2010 at 11:37 AM
  • News

    John Paulson Doesn’t Care About People Who Don’t Want In On His Gold Fund

    The Journal reports today that John Paulson’s gold fund, which launched Jan. 1, is failing to attract investors. We’re told it’ ain’t so. While the fund did lose “about 10%” since it launched, JP is confident and “believes in this play.”

    / Feb 10, 2010 at 10:45 AM
  • News

    Opening Bell: 02.10.10

    Obama Doesn’t `Begrudge’ Millions in Bonuses for `Savvy’ Blankfein, Dimon (Bloomberg) “I know both those guys; they are very savvy businessmen,” Obama said in the interview yesterday in the Oval Office with Bloomberg BusinessWeek, which will appear on newsstands Friday. “I, like most of the American people, don’t begrudge people success or wealth. That is […]

    / Feb 10, 2010 at 9:15 AM
  • News

    JPM: Don’t Worry About The Snow, You Can Spend The Night

    JPMorgan just sent out a memo to employees notifying them that in the event the snowpocalypse is really bad, they can reserve cots to stay over. And if they run out, Jamie Dimon will be happy to take people into his home, located not far from headquarters. TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE OFFER.

    / Feb 9, 2010 at 5:42 PM

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