March 2010

  • News

    Write-Offs: 03.31.10

    $$$ Swiss Move Closer to Releasing UBS Names [NYT] $$$ Former BofA CEO Lewis Not Looking to Settle Civil Charges [FBN] $$$ Dylan Ratigan Looking To Sell [Daily Intel] $$$ Merrill Ends Deutsche Bank Suit Alleging Heaton Hired in Raid of Bankers [Bloomberg]

    / Mar 31, 2010 at 6:00 PM
  • News

    Citadel To Acquire Soleil Securities?

    Allegedly, there’s a possibility. From the mailbag:

    / Mar 31, 2010 at 5:45 PM
  • News

    Citi Statements Re: Zen Gardens, Private Jets To Get A Whole Lot More Colorful

    This doesn’t affect you people directly so much as it will potentially affect me but I just want to put it out there that the news New York Deputy Mayor Edward Skyler has accepted a job at Citigroup as executive vice president of global public affairs has me supremely amped. And not just because he’ll […]

    / Mar 31, 2010 at 5:30 PM
  • News

    Robert Benmosche Has His Reasons For Not Working Out Of AIG’s Corporate Headquarters

    Today the Journal has a story examining the effects of absentee CEOs, particularly those running some of our nation’s shittiest bailed out companies. Though there is the argument that these firms will never learn to stand on their own feet unless we stop coddling them, some feel the absence of daddy chief execs hurts employee […]

    / Mar 31, 2010 at 3:45 PM
  • News

    Dubai Fund-of-Funds Now Open To New Investors– Sinners, Short-Seller Sympathizers Not Welcome

    If you haven’t already invested your $1,000 with Bernett Diversified Global Fund and are looking to get in the game, take two to consider Dubai Shariah Asset Management‘s Kauthar Commodity Fund, which is opening its doors for the first time since launching last year. Here are the relevant deets:

    / Mar 31, 2010 at 2:45 PM
  • News

    Citi Only Stock Getting Swapped For Dinner, Apps At Smith & Wollensky

    Two months ago, in light of the possibility that the majority of your bonuses would be paid out in stock this year, Smith & Wollensky took out the following ad in the New York Times.

    / Mar 31, 2010 at 2:20 PM
  • News

    Fox Developing Movie Based On E*Trade Baby

    Please let what has the potential to be the worst film of the year have a part for Linday “Whore Baby” Lohan, involving her substance (milk) abuse problem.

    / Mar 31, 2010 at 1:15 PM
  • News

    South American Beauty Queens Demonstrating Remarkable Business Acumen, Nose For Drug Trade

    Have you been looking to jump ship but not yet found a shop well-suited to your needs and interests? Have you considered becoming a “model-mule”? It’s a booming field and you should get in when there are still openings available. Sexy and daring women are appearing on most-wanted lists in the United States, Mexico and […]

    / Mar 31, 2010 at 12:45 PM
  • News

    Lynn Tilton Wears F*ck Me Boots In Order To “Garner The Respect I Deserve”

    Distressed debt investor Lynn Tilton recently participated in a podcast for NPR. Early in the interview she was asked “What are you wearing?” to which the Patriarch Partners founder responded, “A Cavalli top, a Versace belt, a Gucci skirt and Prada boots– 4 inches. I need to look sufficiently fierce to make sure I garner […]

    / Mar 31, 2010 at 11:45 AM
  • News

    Citi Employee Sues Bank For “Mommy-Track” Treatment, Co-Workers’ Attempts To Money Off Her Pregnancy

    Last week, former Goldman Sachs employee Charlotte Hannah sued the bank for treating her “like a second-class citizen” due to the fact that growing life inside her body had taken precedence over making it rain. She probably doesn’t have much of a case, as Goldman has always been very upfront about the fact that unless […]

    / Mar 31, 2010 at 11:00 AM
  • Opening Bell

    Opening Bell: 03.31.10

    How Lou Lucido Let AIG Lose $35 Billion With Goldman Sachs CDOs (Bloomberg) Jeffrey Gundlach is involved, natch. 3 Women Sue Bank of America and Merrill Lynch Over Bias (AP) The suit, filed in United States District Court in Brooklyn, accused Bank of America and Merrill Lynch of giving male counterparts of the three employees […]

    / Mar 31, 2010 at 9:15 AM
  • News

    Write-Offs: 03.30.10

    $$$ Insider-Trading Case to Test SEC Reach [WSJ] $$$ Hedge-Fund Returns Are Being Dragged Down by `Hidden Bias': Chart of Day [Bloomberg] $$$ Donald Trump Calls His Kids On Christmas [DI] $$$ Is There a Chocolate “Conspiracy“? [TBM via Heidi Moore]

    / Mar 30, 2010 at 6:35 PM
  • News

    Lenny Dykstra Drops Case Against JPMorgan

    Less than two weeks ago, Lenny Dykstra filed a $100 million suit against JPMorgan née Washington Mutual, claiming it was the bank that caused Nails to lose millions due to “predatory lending” and it is Jamie Dimon who should be losing sleep at night over the fact that Nails lives in the back of a […]

    / Mar 30, 2010 at 5:14 PM
  • News

    When Buying A Vacation Home…

    …don’t forget the two most important rules- to make sure it’s in a place your jet or chopper can access, and that you hate your family. Advice On Buying A Summer Home [WSJ]

    / Mar 30, 2010 at 5:00 PM
  • News

    What’s In Charlie Gasparino’s Fanny Pack?

    This from someone who goes to the News Corp. gym on the third floor of 1211 6th Ave. Gaspo, in addition to grunting and constantly checking his Blackberry in the office gym, also wears a curiously-feminine fanny pack when working out. Not sure what’s in the fanny pack. Maybe a bottle of Cool Water cologne??

    / Mar 30, 2010 at 4:35 PM
  • News

    Fashion Meets Finance Is Back

    What’s this joyous news you hear? The next Fashion Meets Finance is taking place April 8. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the even, FMF is based on the idea that “women in fashion need men who can facilitate their pre-30 marriage/retirement plan, and men in finance need women who will allow them […]

    / Mar 30, 2010 at 3:30 PM
  • News

    Charlie Gasparino On His Jon Corzine Encounter: “Corzine Isn’t Afraid Of Gregg’s Muscles, He’s Afraid Of Me”

    Watch the latest business video at Chaz corroborates our theory and adds: “Corzine was noticeably nervous. He kept looking at me, looking down, looking away. Then he finished his meal and then darted for the door– I’m telling you, he ran.”

    / Mar 30, 2010 at 2:07 PM
  • News

    How Did Kendrick Wilson III “Soothe” Stephen Schwarzman’s “Bruised Feelings”?

    In January, Kendrick Wilson III joined BlackRock as a vice-chairman, which is why he’s the subject of a Bloomberg profile today. Forty some odd years ago, he was nicknamed “Wildcat” by his undergrad chums at Dartmouth, which is why he’s the basis for the lead character in an upcoming erotic novel about life in the […]

    / Mar 30, 2010 at 1:50 PM

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