In our last edition of “Things you thought you knew re: James Dimon but were in fact dead wrong about,” we told you that contrary to the belief of certain prosecutors, Dimon does not in fact have time to make bi-weekly runs to Atlanta, to dump used tires, illegally. Today it’s a matter of taste. Specifically that of TV. Most of you wrote in to say you took JD for a Jersey Shore kinda guy. Well you were wrong, fucksticks! If you know anything about the JPMorgan CEO, it’s that he loves a good fight and if he can throw down with his dancing feet as opposed to fisticuffs? ALL THE BETTER.
One Equity Partners, J.P. Morgan Chase & Co.’s private-equity arm, is nearing a deal to buy out CKX Inc., the owner of the blockbuster television enterprise “American Idol” and “So You Think You Can Dance,” for roughly $6 a share, according to people familiar with the matter. Robert F.X. Sillerman, chief executive of CKX, would retain his roughly 20.6% stake as part of the proposed deal.
Lest there be any confusion, Dimon thinks AI is shit, but sometimes you have to suck it up in order to get what you want. Having said that, if Ryan Seacrest thinks he’s pull his prima donna crap with JD, he’s got another thing coming.
One issue for the company is that it is costly to keep the talent happy. The company, for example, recently paid Ryan Seacrest to $15 million to retain him for future projects and for the rights to market his name and image, according to analysts.
He’ll take what Dimon pays him and he’ll like it or guess what? It’ll be live from the red carpet with the CEO of JPMorgan Chase.

fishy
Berlin, Take My Breath Away, the cream always rises to the top.
2 = DJ Squirrely D
By the by, golf clap.
JPMorgan turns everything it touches into gold. LEAP Calls on JPMorgan.
Nothing to do with nothing, but I’m interested to see what Julie Mehretu’s 43rd interview with GS was like. http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2010/03/29/100329fa_fact_tomkins
HT: Lucas van Praag
that’s one lucky blonde.
@4 if you’re so sure why not sell puts & earn decay?
Is that a studded belt he’s wearing, or is he just happy to see her?
Jamie Dimon is gay.
Fox Enforcer/Correspondent CG
@7 CFA
I now hate the day I named my firm “Fuckstick Capital Advisors LLC”.