March 2010

  • News

    What Did Bill Ackman Eat For Lunch The Day He Told MBIA’s CEO To Stuff It?

    As many of you are aware, when Bill Ackman was just a young pup of a money manager, before he was coming up with genius one-stock funds, he placed a bet against MBIA, based on Ackman’s belief that the company’s AAA rating was the stuff of bull shit.  No one had ever dared question the […]

    / Mar 24, 2010 at 12:00 PM
  • Opening Bell

    Opening Bell: 03.24.10

    Tax-Break Law Could Benefit JPMorgan (WSJ) JPM is nearing a deal that would allow it to benefit from a tax refund of as much as $1.4 billion, becoming the latest company to tap a little-noticed plank in an economic stimulus bill. That law let companies apply losses from 2008 or ’09 against taxes paid in […]

    / Mar 24, 2010 at 9:15 AM
  • News

    Write-Offs: 03.23.10

    $$$ Corzine Returns to Wall Street as CEO of MF Global [Bloomberg] $$$ To The FDIC Small Is Beautiful [TBM] $$$ SEC Employees Were Masturbating to Kiddie Porn While Your Economy Tanked [Gawker] $$$ Feinberg Caps Pay At AIG, Others [WSJ]

    / Mar 23, 2010 at 5:30 PM
  • News

    Have You Been Sexually Harassed Lately?

    Apparently the answer is yes. Whether or not your boss doing things to you with whiteboard markers is a new occurrence or you were just scared to come forward and the financial crisis for some reason gave you the courage is unclear. Since the start of the recession, a growing number of sexual harassment complaints […]

    / Mar 23, 2010 at 5:00 PM
  • News

    Moore Capital London Office Raided, At Least One Employee Arrested

    BBC: The London-based hedge fund, Moore Capital, was one of the firms raided by the City watchdog the FSA, the BBC has learned. One person at Moore Capital and five other City workers are being held. Those arrested are suspected of taking part in a long-running insider-dealing scheme. The arrests came after 16 addresses were […]

    / Mar 23, 2010 at 1:15 PM
  • News

    Few Bailed Out Bank Execs Made Good On Promises To Quit

    Remember, back in the day, when Kenneth Feinberg was named Comp Cop and everyone working at a bailed out company, who were told their asses were about to be capped, threatened to leave if he so much as dared to take a penny of their hard-earned money away? Sure you did, they wouldn’t shut up […]

    / Mar 23, 2010 at 11:00 AM
  • News

    Charlie Gasparino: Lloyd Blankfein Was Probably Due $100 Million

    Watch the latest business video at In spite of the fact that the li’l fella may have said some untoward things about CG (who in turn suggested LB do everyone a favor and quit), Chaz would like to give props were they are due.

    / Mar 23, 2010 at 10:30 AM
  • News

    Punishment For UBS Tax Evaders Actually Not That Bad A Deal

    Are you one of the UBS clients who maybe used the firm to get around paying your some or all of your taxes? Have you been considering whether or not to come forward and admit it, not because of the shame (there’s no shame in this! Except that you’re lumped in the same category as […]

    / Mar 23, 2010 at 9:45 AM
  • Opening Bell

    Opening Bell: 03.23.10

    Treasury’s Geithner Urges End to Fannie, Freddie ‘Ambiguity’ (Bloomberg) “Private gains can no longer be supported by the umbrella of public protection, capital standards must be higher and excessive risk-taking must be appropriately restrained,” Geithner said in testimony prepared for the House Financial Services Committee. Buffett May Pursue Liquor Distributors After Purchase of Empire’s Parent […]

    / Mar 23, 2010 at 9:00 AM
  • News

    Write-Offs: 03.22.10

    $$$ Wine trader has sense of opportunity [NYP] $$$ New York Fed Warehousing Junk Loans On Its Books: Examiner’s Report [HuffPo] $$$ How Nemazee Used Harvard Degree Swindling Banks of $292 Million [Bloomberg] $$$ What the Mafia Can Teach Us About Corporate Fraud [The Big Money]

    / Mar 22, 2010 at 7:45 PM
  • News

    Vikram Pandit Doesn’t Give A Rat’s Ass If You Have Money Riding On These Games

    Thought you should know, a revolt is afoot at Citi, as IT just put a block on Definitely at 388 Greenwich Street, probably firmwide. During March Madness no less!

    / Mar 22, 2010 at 4:50 PM
  • News

    Before Shoving A [Female Hormone Pill] Down Your Junior Trader’s Mouth, Consider Butching Up Your Bitches

    If women ran Wall Street, Lehman Brothers, Merrill Lynch and LTCM would all be in business today, according to this article, which today raises the debate that’s been raised just a few (million) times since the crisis started. Females are more risk averse, the presence of testosterone breeds more testosterone (whereas environments with less T […]

    / Mar 22, 2010 at 4:15 PM
  • News

    Dick Parsons: Give It Up For Vikram Pandit And All The Members Of Team Citi

    The Citi Chairman told Bloomberg today that his little CEO that could has done “a tremendous job” but “has not been given the credit that is due to him and his team. His team being all the people of Citi.” So take two today to figure out how to tell the Citi employee in your […]

    / Mar 22, 2010 at 2:40 PM
  • News

    Fund That Lost 86 Percent In A Month Has Some Wise Words To Share

    Ebullio Capital Management is the commodities fund that lost 86 percent in February, after declining 70 percent in January, and YTD, is down 96 percent. We’ve already discussed the fact that in his letter to investors, founder Lars Steffensen was able to a) offer hope, by noting his ample qualifications to come back from such […]

    / Mar 22, 2010 at 2:15 PM
  • News

    Comp Cop To Take A Serious Look At Bailed Out Bank Bonuses He Can’t Do Anything About

    Actually, that’ s not entirely fair. Kenneth Feinberg can *try* to renegotiate payments he characterizes as not good for the people. But when it comes down to it? Yeah he can’t do shit. Which is why we suggest K.Fein perform his “look back” while enjoying an herbal refreshment in Jimmy Cayne’s new executive suite (tricked […]

    / Mar 22, 2010 at 1:34 PM
  • News

    One Hedge Fund Actually Did Something About Its Impotent Weather Rage

    Remember a few weeks back when– OMG!– it snowed a few inches and nobody would shut the hell up about it? These people actually did something productive about it, other than coining terms like ‘snowpocalypse.’ “To put it simply, we were bullish on the weather,” Henrik Wennberg, a portfolio manager, said in a telephone interview […]

    / Mar 22, 2010 at 1:00 PM
  • News

    Despite Trump’s Claims To The Contrary, Carl Icahn Has DEFINITIVE PROOF He And The Don Are Not Good Friends

    The Times had a long profile of Carl Icahn over the weekend, wondering if the activist investor still has a fight in him, his likes and dislikes (being referred to as “raider,” for one), his early years in the biz (“When he turned 15, he played his own version of the ice futures market as […]

    / Mar 22, 2010 at 12:30 PM
  • News

    Carl Ichan Is “The Elvis Presley Of The Activist World”

    According to Scott Galloway, of “don’t burst into show tunes, urinate on the desk, or practice hair-removal in my class” fame.

    / Mar 22, 2010 at 11:56 AM
  • News

    The Perks Of Being A Blankfein Child Working At Goldman Are Not Necessarily Reflected In One’s Paycheck?

    It’s already been widely reported that Lloyd Blankfein’s son Jonathan will join the the other vampires at Goldman Sachs this summer, after he graduates from Harvard. LB’s older son Alexander (Harvard ’08) already works there, having made it through the a very rigorous interview process that lasted 57 rounds until everyone was sure this kid […]

    / Mar 22, 2010 at 10:30 AM
  • Opening Bell

    Opening Bell: 03.22.10

    Obama Paying More Than Buffett as Treasuries Show U.S. Losing AAA Stature (Bloomberg) Two-year notes sold by the billionaire’s Berkshire Hathaway Inc. in February yield 3.5 basis points less than Treasuries of similar maturity, according to data compiled by Bloomberg. Procter & Gamble Co., Johnson & Johnson and Lowe’s Cos. debt also traded at lower […]

    / Mar 22, 2010 at 9:15 AM
  • News

    Write-Offs: 03.19.10

    $$$ Chris Dodd Asks Department Of Justice To Probe Lehman Repo 105 And “Other” Accounting [ZH] $$$ AIG CDOs Sold to Federal Reserve Placed on Review for Downgrade by Moody’s [Bloomberg] $$$ Goldman Sachs Sued for Not Divulging Madoff Ban to Investor [] $$$ Fallen trader has run out of options [Sydney Morning Herald]

    / Mar 19, 2010 at 5:00 PM
  • News

    Howard Marks Is Depressed

    About the government.

    / Mar 19, 2010 at 4:25 PM
  • News

    An Example Of What’ll Get You Fired From Lehman Brothers

    It’s not just chinos and pieces on the side. Another thing that made the Gorilla table flippingly mad was uppity pipsqueaks who dared to mention concerns about the firm committing fraud. Via the WSJ, here’s the letter that got whistle-blower Matthew Lee fired. He won’t make that mistake again! MATTHEW LEE May 18, 2008 PERSONAL […]

    / Mar 19, 2010 at 3:45 PM
  • News

    New Hedge Fund Taking Page From Jesus’s Playabook

    It’s JC Day on Dealbreaker, so here’s a hedge fund, inspired by Christ. Charging 2 and 20, $500,000 minimum. Get in at the ground floor: C3:23 Capital debuted in January with $2 million. The long/short equity fund was founded by Trevor Chase Brown, an Atlanta investor who told that he’s been managing his own […]

    / Mar 19, 2010 at 12:45 PM
  • News

    Stephen Roach Has An Idea For How We Should Deal With Certain Troublesome Economists

    The same way we deal with anyone who dispenses advice we don’t agree with, or breaks into our house in the middle of the night: “Take out a baseball bat on him.”

    / Mar 19, 2010 at 10:45 AM
  • News

    What Sort Of Investment Advice Is The Pope Giving Out These Days?

    As most of you probably know, Pope Benedict XVI is not just a spiritual adviser but a financial adviser as well. Last year in a letter to clients he noted that while there is something of a gray area when it comes to the tapping of underage ass, he and his team draw the line […]

    / Mar 19, 2010 at 10:15 AM
  • News, Opening Bell

    Opening Bell: 03.19.10

    Alarm Was Raised On Lehman (FT) Former Merrill Lynch officials said they contacted regulators about the way Lehman measured its liquidity position for competitive reasons. The Merrill officials said they were coming under pressure from their trading partners and investors, who feared that Merrill was less ­liquid than Lehman. Norway CEOs, Analysts, Inmates Compete in […]

    / Mar 19, 2010 at 8:30 AM
  • News

    Write-Offs: 03.18.10

    $$$ Heidi Moore: The Big Short Gets the People Right and the Finance Right [TBM] $$$ Blackstone prez to host ‘private’ Pelosi fundraiser (I just want you to appreciate the graphic). [NYP] $$$ Hedge fund matchmakers cannot escape scrutiny [Reuters] $$$ Wall Street, Obama Parting Ways (according to Charlie Gasparino) [FBN] $$$ Cuomo Expands Pension […]

    / Mar 18, 2010 at 6:30 PM

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