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Do You Want To Know Why Your Co-Workers Think You’re A Weirdo?

The scene: you’re on a coffee break up in Stamford chatting it up with a couplea the guys you work with. The topic turns to the new hot chick in the office and one guy wonders aloud what kind of panties she wears. Bob says it’s gotta be thongs. Dave says he doesn’t understand why women wouldn’t just go commando, as thongs seem like they’d be wicked uncomfortable. It’s at this time that you say, “Actually, no, they’re not bad at all.” Everyone stares at you a second and then Dave asks slowly, “How would you know that?” Naturally you answer, “I know from personal experience of course. I wear women’s underwear.”

Now, first off, I would like to say that while I personally would never judge you for such a thing, there are others who are less open minded. You’d think at a forward thinking firm there’d be nothing wrong with speaking freely about this stuff, especially since you know for a fact that at least half of your male colleagues are wearing women’s undergarments as we speak but apparently you’d think wrong. Everyone would’ve preferred that you had instead pumped the breaks on your admission and for future reference, when you’re considering getting personal, instead shutting the fuck up. Don’t feel bad though. You’re not alone.

Lots of people just want to let it out. On topics ranging from being 100% hairless.

Patti Sweeney and a dozen of her coworkers recently went out to lunch to celebrate the completion of a project. Over burgers and salads, they chitchatted about their work, their families and their hobbies. One colleague mentioned that he was training for a 20-mile bike race, adding that he had just purchased a new helmet and Lycra shorts. To the group’s mortification, Ms. Sweeney says, he then described shaving his entire body to reduce aerodynamic drag.

“Why, why, why do we need to go there?” says Ms. Sweeney, a 36-year-old financial analyst for a communications company who lives in Bartlett, Ill. “This is information about a coworker, not someone I really consider a friend, and now it’s forever burned in my brain.”

To clarifying that they are not in fact barren.

Majid Alsayegh is still chuckling over the female public-relations representative in her late 30s who told him at the end of their first meeting several years ago that she was single, looking for a nice guy in case he knew of anyone, and that, despite her age, she was ready, willing and able to bear children. “I was left somewhat speechless,” says Mr. Alsayegh, 54, a real-estate developer in Douglassville, Pa. “I think that I said something like, ‘Always good to know.'”

The bit about women’s underwear.

Another time, a colleague told her that her ex-husband would wear her underwear and confided some very personal complaints about her current husband.

Plus fucking on the first date, and their bastard children.

At a get-to-know-you lunch with a few coworkers she had just met, one woman blurted out: “I have a 16-year-old son who was conceived on my first date with my husband in high school.” Another time, a colleague told her that her ex-husband would wear her underwear and confided some very personal complaints about her current husband.


Bonds: Oversharing Invades The Office
[WSJ]

44 comments
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44 Responses to “Do You Want To Know Why Your Co-Workers Think You’re A Weirdo?”

  1. Anonymous says:

    Maybe Bess can tell us what those thongs are really like…or is she a commando chic?

  2. FK says:

    “The scene: you’re on a coffee break up in Stamford chatting it up with a couplea the guys you work with. The topic turns to the new hot chick in the office and one guy wonders aloud what kind of panties she wears.”

    The topic should be: whether she likes it doggy style or on her back?

    LOL

  3. Bess Levin says:

    @2 You transition to that from the thongs. Jesus.

  4. guest says:

    What a smut factory.

  5. Anonymous says:

    bess, i have a mild case of alopecia…do i have a shot?

  6. Larry David says:

    I’m Larry David and I enjoy wearing women’s panties

  7. FK says:

    @3 Thank You, Sir!!!!

  8. This entry absolutely screams for input from CG.

  9. Anonymous says:

    Bess, does Breaking Media allow you to go commando?

    -Ephram

  10. Anonymous says:

    Here’s a tip for you guys: Women’s thongs look a lot better on a fellow if you wear the bigger piece of the thong fabric in the front.

    ~Rod Stewart
    Hot Legs, CA

  11. Anonymous says:

    @4…I agree. Stamford is a smut factory.

  12. PermaGuest says:

    @3/BL to be fair to #2 that IS what the unsaid thought would be.

  13. Anal_yst says:

    @Pfluger

    No, it does not.

  14. guest says:

    @11 I meant the WSJ, but, sure, Stamford.
    @2 & @12 who cares how she “likes it?”

  15. Anonymous says:

    Would it be embarrassing to admit you were wearing a thong when LB and his nuclear-powered balls violated you or would you get an invitation to a support group for all the people who have been violated by LB and his nuclear-powered balls?

  16. Anonymous says:

    Anal_yst @13,
    What are your thoughts on wearing women’s undies? Do you prefer VS over Hanes Her Way?

    -Guy who looks to Anal_yst for his thoughts

  17. @13:

    Come on now — Hairless men? People who “just want to let it out.” Gratuitous, off-topic, inappropriate comments about one’s personal life.

    This topic is perfect for Gaspo, on many levels….

  18. Anonymous says:

    I like the word SIZZLE. Anyone else like the word sizzle? Its fun to say, Sizzle. Anal_yst, any thoughts on the word, Sizzle?

    -The Sizzler

  19. Anonymous says:

    @no and take your piss poor attempts at humor elsewhere.

    -wearer of women’s panties

  20. OptionTrader says:

    As a woman I enjoy laced panties with a pocket in the front with my cellphone in it. That way my husband can call me during the day and vibrate my clit. You have to spice things up these days!

  21. muchado says:

    @20 you go girl!

  22. guest says:

    @3 For some reason, THAT is soooo hot…..

  23. Anonymous says:

    @18, the word you’re looking for is “pizzle”

    i.e. I’d like to pizzle that girl with the thong hanging out.

    Regards,

    DJ Whoo Kid

  24. Anonymous says:

    My name is Jim CaVizzle.

  25. @20: Is it a toll free 800-number? Did you set it so that voice mail only kicks in after several minutes of “ringing?”

    Are you concerned with radiation? Does the phone’s warranty cover damages caused by excessive moisture?

    There are just so many questions. And your comment gives new meaning to the term “hands free” calling.

  26. TGFD says:

    OptionsTrader is a dude

  27. Anonymous says:

    Bess, are you a Jew for Jesus?

  28. OptionTrader says:

    @26 I’m tired of being called a dude chief. There is a person called “OptionsTrader” then there is me, “OptionTrader. Learn the difference you subhuman fuck.

    @25 It’s a blackberry with a protector case, so I’m sure it handles well. All other questions can be directed to my husband unless you want to give me $100K shares of GS at a discount.

  29. Anonymous says:

    if blackberry fits you shouldnt be wearing a thong

  30. OptionTrader says:

    @29 it’s a pearl.

  31. Anonymous says:

    optionstrader is a dude whose mom sells anal sex by the half hour

  32. Anonymous says:

    @OptionsTrader: I guess that means it would match your necklace?

  33. Anonymous says:

    Optionstrader and Optiontrader are douschebags. I think that’s gender neutral

  34. Bess Levin says:

    30-33 Shut up and stay focused on the topic at hand.

  35. Ballsy says:

    Girl on a first date confides that she has only one ovary. Weird / Not Weird?

  36. PermaGuest says:

    Depends if she’s cute.

  37. Frank the Tank says:

    “The scene: you’re on a coffee break up in Stamford chatting it up with a couplea the guys you work with. The topic turns to the new hot chick in the office and one guy wonders aloud what kind of panties she wears.”

    Uh, odds are they are probably basic white, cotton, underpants. But I sort of think well maybe they’re silk panties, maybe it’s a thong. Maybe it’s something really cool that I don’t even know about. You know, and uh, and I started feeling… what? what I thought we were in the trust tree in the nest, were we not?

  38. Anonymous says:

    -@37

    Hats off, a true fan.

  39. StillNotNasser says:

    #10, Love your work, RS baby. Love you in South Park, too.

  40. ChaPlease says:

    I personally enjoy wearing women’s stockings while I trade in the Asian markets. It’s just feels…natural.

  41. Gozer says:

    @40

    During Asia I enjoy listening to Rob Zombie while punching myself in the crouch and chugging Zimas

  42. Anonymous says:

    Training for a 20-mile bike race? I do that distance for my short morning ride.

    – Guy who prefers to go hairless.

  43. Anonymous says:

    Larry Summers wears a mankini

  44. Loser says:

    @42…20 miles is a bike race? I can’t be the only one that thought that 20 was a sprint…..

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