Goldman Sachs Exec Tries Interesting New Tactic Re: Bonuses

Goldman Sachs has done a lot to try and stem the rage over some people’s belief that the Masters of the Universe did not deserve their nicely-sized bonuses this year. They’ve taken away the cash portion of Lloyd and Co’s, they’ve made senior management fork over a bunch of their money to charity (including a special fund set up specifically to “help Matt Taibbi get the help he needs”), they canceled plans for the annual DuckTails-esque money pit for the distribution of the young employees’ comp, and so on and so forth. And yet. People still won’t get off their asses. So. It was time try something different. A new approach. One that would perhaps appeal to the plebes, where most of the ridiculous bitching is coming from. Everybody agreed this was a great idea, and last night at a fundraiser for Harry Reid held by Goldman co-President Gary Cohn, it was put to the test.

Charlie Gasparino, not on hand but working the phones as soon as he heard there was a party going down that contained four of mankind’s most nefarious elements, to him (Goldman employees, Democrats, “those Hymen Roth-types,” and passed hors d’oeuvres), reports:

A press official for Reid confirmed there was some acrimony at the meeting and said Reid took it all in stride. At one point, one of the Goldman executives complained about being attacked by politicians for receiving large bonuses by saying, “You don’t know how expensive it is to live in New York City.”

While some might doubt the genius of this move, pump the brakes ’til you hear the rationale from the c-suite. Most of the people giving GS shit are peasants, right? Given. And peasants don’t live in the big city, they live in places far far way where they don’t know what the cost of rent or an apartment at 15CPW is like. But if they did, they’d probably realize they’re judging GS a bit too harshly and that really, what may seem like “huge ass bonuses” to them are essentially minimum wages because it costs a lot more to send your kids to private schools and install auto-fellatio room in your penthouse in NYC than it does in other parts of the country. And they’d probably have no problem with all this at all.

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9 Responses to “Goldman Sachs Exec Tries Interesting New Tactic Re: Bonuses”

  1. InfiniteGuest says:

    I was thinking earlier today, wouldn’t it be better overall to swap Harry for another Democrat, someone further to the left. Same for Schumer. And then work on Durbin for the next 2Y.

  2. Anonymous says:

    Mr Gasparino, I don’t like your kind of people. I don’t like to see you come out to this clean country in oily hair and dressed up in those silk suits, and try to pass yourselves off as decent Americans. I’ll do business with you but the fact is that I despise your masquerade, the dishonest way you pose yourself. Yourself and your whole f**king family.

    ~Sen. Reid

  3. Anonymous says:

    There is something really weird in the water at goldman sachs lately. Some of the executives are into some messed up things. Has anybody seen the story of how some higher up there was personally involved in the creation of that attack site DirtyPhoneBook for instance.

    Proof here.

  4. Anonymous says:

    It was a lot cheaper where I was. Sure, the business wasn’t as steady, but you didn’t need a bonus to live.


  5. Anonymous says:

    @4 Please. Anyone could live in New York on $1 a year.


  6. ummm says:

    GS throws fund raisers for Reid? How do you complain about the costs of living in NYC and then continue to vote DEM? The reason things are so expensive is because of pols like reid.

    Get rid of him and he can take Chuck the Schmuck with him. GS deserves all they fund raise for.

  7. Anonymous says:

    besseme, besseme’s not pump the breaks, it’s pump the brakes.

    – guy who knows how to pump the brakes, pre ABS

  8. Fritz says:

    Goldman is a bucket shop.

  9. Anonymous says:

    “install auto-fellatio room in your penthouse”

    Oh Bess, you are priceless.