Anthony Scaramucci, a CNBC contributor and founder of SkyBridge Capital, has a new book out on how to find your fortune without turning into a douche. Scaramucci was once fired from Goldman, but he still absorbed some lessons from the firm’s training program.
Here’s a scene from the book, Goodbye Gordon Gekko:
It was the Friday beginning Memorial Day weekend in 1991 and Scaramucci was summoned to a conference room at 85 Broad St. with 40 of his fellow Goldman trainees. They were told to get there at 5pm and wait for a Goldman partner to show up to run the meeting.
Three hours later, still no Goldman partner and some of the trainees were getting restless. “What’s up? Where is this jerk? I have plans in the Hamptons and want to get going,” Scaramucci recalls one of them saying . At 9pm, three anxious recruits with “MBAs from top grad schools” got up and left, presumably on their way to the beach.
The “lanky and scrawny” partner finally showed up five hours late and delivered a harsh lesson to the minions left in the room. (The three who left were canned the next day.)
So, today’s lesson is about waiting patiently for those who are more important than you. Someday you may be in the lobby of a billionaire, and he or she may make you wait. Your job as a representative of Goldman Sachs is to wait there. We are in the client service business. We wait patiently and graciously.
Now, you may have a fancy degree from a fancy place, but that will never replace having the right attitude.
Who cares about what this clown has to say? No way am I waiting 5 hours for anyone.
So the lesson is that one should never assume that a billionaire client has a phone, or an office with a phone, or an assistant with a phone?
that is the stupidest thing I ever heard. That partner is a piece of shit.
learn to spell kouwe
Bullshit.
what an amazing use of GS’s employees’ time…
I actually like this lesson and the fact that those MBA d-bags who left early got fired!
Your KOUWANUS is leaking again. Stop eating those olestra tainted tater chips!
7 = RayDal
Screw that. If I were a billionaire and some clown spent 5 hours waiting in my lobby, I’d never do business with him again. If you’ve got the time to sit there twiddling your thumbs all day instead of actually working, your business is obviously not adding value.
This is a lesson that is better applied to Biglaw…since they bill per the hour they should wait and should like it.
Better question- why would a partner hang around until 10:00 p.m. on the Friday before Memorial Day for this nonsense?
STFU 10. I got my job at Citadel by waiting for 7 hours in a lobby room. Patience and persistence are key values.
@12:
5-7: dinner
7-7:30: post-dinner dump/travel time
7:30-9: massage+
9-9:45: drinks
9:45-10: drinks in office
10: game time
Yeah, that’s how they used to learn about client service. Now they learn by marketing crap pools to each other despite knowing it is a shitty deal! ANSWER THE QUESTION!
-C.Levin
WTF clients were GS servicing in ’91, Godot Capital?
@OptionTrader
I thought you got the job because you know how to use the three sea shells
During my time as a trainee at Goldman Sachs, they once had me and three others locked in a depravation chamber without food or water. We were fed package after package of ex lax and shortly after, one of the firm’s clients was seated in the room with us.
After a few more hours, the strain of our excited bowels became noticeable with the grimaces and beads of sweat forming on our faces. Feeling bold and unable to contain myself further, I calmly walked over to the client, greeted him cordially, and proceeded to take a dump into his lap.
Soon a partner from the firm came into the room and seemed pleased with my behavior saying it was consistent with Goldman’s culture.
He clapped his hands and asked, “Are you comfortable continuing to treat the firm’s clients in such a manner?”
“No problem”, I replied.
No idea about client services, but Goldman Standard Time was the rule for all the meetings (5 mins late).
@18 awful.
@18 don’t attempt humor again.
The partner is an asshole.
If you have a meeting an the client is an hour late, you call their assistant and ask what’s going on.
LOL @18
@18 defintely good.
@18 – Take a lap. Very poor attempt to emulate the ingeniousness of the “naughty hawk” comment thread.
@18 I LOL-ed all over my keys
I enjoyed 18, well played
18 = completely unoriginal
@18 Scatological humor is not everybody’s forte. So lay off it.
@18 of course it was unoriginal, it was a comment by comfortablysmug who’s known for attempting to pass off DB comment jokes as his own (poorly, of course).
I’m still waiting in that room!!
~Wharton Grad, Class of 1991
I call B/S on the story cited in “Goodbye Gordon Gekko”
Here is a true event which happened to a good buddy of mine 16 years ago. He was in an interview (3rd round) at GS and he was, at the time, about to graduate with an MBA from an Ivy.
The MD he was speaking to got a phone call during the meeting and said, ‘wait for me here, I’ll be right back’.
So my buddy waits, waits and waits. He’s heard stories about mind games at GS so, he gives it about an hour and a half, before he comes to the conclusion that he’d rather not work at such a f’kd up institution if they treat candidates like lab rats. So he decides to leave and on his way out he stops to speak to an Associate in the bullpen to leave a message for the “MD”. The Associate says… ‘oh shit, he got fired about an hour ago….’
This was during the 93/94 purge.
Tool #1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q_desuQATwg
Considering the character Gordon Gekko was much more like that potential client billionaire GS trainees were instructed to wait 5 hrs for…
Well of course the book is inappropriately titled for marketing purposes.
So what was the urgent meeting about? Was there in fact a topic, or was this some type of Goldmanesque test to see who would wait around for hours for some self-proclaimed BSD?
“Having the right attitude” – sounds like a line from Cool Hand Luke. I liked Luke’s attitude, which was basically a smirk and an FU, “boss”.
Goldman training program:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LvwqK2gn3S0&feature=related
“Gekko” was an amalgam of Ivan Boesky & Henry Kravis and went to CUNY.
This story is bullshit.
@37 – I am a cloned child of Kravis, my father is no CUN* alumnus but rather a Columbia MBA (MBA>CUNY>CFA). Lay off the jell-o powder.
I showed up 5 minutes late to my Goldman interviews in January because I already had an offer with the bank I wanted, and I wanted to stick it to those douche bags… I dont think they appreciated it. Success.
So GS wants a culture of knobs who just passively sit there? Awesome!
Better ending – the MD fires the guys who left early for not knowing their place. And then fires everyone who waited around because they were too passive.
Kind of the IB (and sociopathic)version of the Kobayashi Maru.
PS -well done 18
@39: You are my new hero. Once, when I was pissed at a Goldman banker BSD, I employed a Goldman technique myself. I had my Admin call the banker. When he answered the phone, she informed him, “Please hold for Mr. ____.”
Of course the pussy threw a hissy fit and complained to my manager at the time, and I got in a bit of trouble, but it was well worth it.
@35–”what we have here is a failure to communicate”
@18: clearly you know nothing about Goldman, or you would have substituted “down his throat” for “into his lap.”
0/10: Could be because I more or less have “done my time” (aka “sold my 20s to the company”, but my time is not for sale to a place that has little consideration for my life outside of work. This is a supreme way of singling out absolutely hungry candidates that will make great grunts though.
who else thinks Scaramucci is a worthless assbag like Madoff was?
what a joke. in the likely scenario that the partner got tied up and forgot about the meeting until tuesday morning, do they really want to keep the kids who slept on the floor through the weekend sucking their thumbs to the tune of “but, he said he would come…”
sounds like somebody needs a night in the box!
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