• 21 May 2010 at 2:35 PM

Somebody Adopt Cody Willard!

Your devastating news of the day/week/month (fuck it, year): Fox Business has canceled Happy Hour. At this time it’s reportedly “unclear” as to how the three hosts will be affected but it’s obvious CW’s gonna need a home. Who among you are wiling to take him in? Here’s a quick list of what he brings to the table:

1) As the founder of a hedge fund that at one time had as much as $5,000 in assets under management, is considered one of the greatest minds on Wall Street.

2) Is a voracious Twitter’er and could possibly manage your account

3) IS CHILDHOOD FRIENDS WITH NEIL PATRICK HARRIS, who would probably stop by your office at least once if his little buddy was given a desk there.

Comments (20)

  1. Posted by HAM05 | May 21, 2010 at 2:42 PM

    2nd sign of the deuchepocolypse

  2. Posted by Someone who once met Soros | May 21, 2010 at 2:43 PM

    I will. He is such a nice little piglet.

    - Lisa Falcone

  3. Posted by guest | May 21, 2010 at 2:45 PM

    @1 (HAM05) Icing was the first?

  4. Posted by Anonymous | May 21, 2010 at 2:51 PM

    He looks like a lovable falcon.

  5. Posted by Anonymous | May 21, 2010 at 2:54 PM

    Even a stopped watch is right twice a day.

  6. Posted by Anonymous | May 21, 2010 at 3:14 PM

    Oh really. Wow, this is your lucky day Cody. My former roommates aren’t around anymore. You can stay with me.

    -Jeff Dahmer

  7. Posted by Anonymous | May 21, 2010 at 3:17 PM

    any comments from Australiur?

  8. Posted by jj | May 21, 2010 at 3:22 PM

    I will miss the dipsh@t brunette with him

  9. Posted by NakedShort | May 21, 2010 at 3:30 PM

    I’d love to see him make a sex tape with Elena Kagan. She could bend him over and stretch him out with a 22oz Smirnoff Ice strap on. Once he has climaxed he could pull the bottle out shove it in her face and “ice” her.

  10. Posted by Arthur | May 21, 2010 at 3:33 PM

    I’ll give him a gig if he brings S. E. Cupp with him from Fox’s Red Eye. And he can watch if he likes, I’m not shy.

    PS – I believe he never actually got the $5,000 in his fund — it was soft-circled but never came in.

  11. Posted by guest | May 21, 2010 at 3:39 PM

    @lisa take me too please?

    -sc

  12. Posted by Perkins Maxwell | May 21, 2010 at 3:47 PM

    @NS / 9: Your imagination scares me: There’s things buried in there that should never see the light of day. There’s also things buried in that that cause me to have to replace keyboards after spitting coffee all over them. So maybe that nameless fear is just the price I have to pay a good laugh every day or two.

  13. Posted by Jerry Cruncher | May 21, 2010 at 3:50 PM

    I’ll miss him about as much as I missed that rash the Thai hooker gave me.

  14. Posted by guest | May 21, 2010 at 3:56 PM

    At long last, Cody is free to devote himself full-time to rock and roll.

  15. Posted by Foxwatcher | May 21, 2010 at 4:03 PM

    Eric bolling was the only one on that show that had a clue.

  16. Posted by Adam | May 21, 2010 at 4:23 PM

    Bolling is a Rock Star. Anxious to see how they use him going forward.

  17. Posted by Anonymous | May 21, 2010 at 8:11 PM

    “harold and maude 2″ god damn i hate that jerkoff. seeya at nydol.

  18. Posted by Anonymous | May 22, 2010 at 11:31 PM

    Bring General Charlie Gasparino in.

  19. Posted by Anonymous | May 24, 2010 at 9:16 AM

    LOL@18. Now that is hysterical. Can you imagine the Gossip King who, according to well placed and yet anonymous sources (sound familiar GasBag) has a precision rate of 14% with his prognostications (in other words, he is correct in 1 out of every 7 guesses), with a daily need for content. My God – the shit that he would make up. I mean, look at all the rubbish he puts forth now when he has a daily two minutes to fill. The potential liability to FBN by putting this guy in a position where he had to provide even more MISINFORMATION to the market is scary!

  20. Posted by Anonymous | July 18, 2010 at 11:58 AM

    bad things happen to bad people, good riddence

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