Lisa Maria Falcone WILL NOT BE BROKEN

You can break her foot, sneaky Vespa bike, but you will never break her spirit, or sense of fashion.

At dinner at Phillips de Pury on 15th Street for the 2010 Party on the High Line and Summer Dinner, hockey player Sean Avery was wearing a short-sleeved shirt and black jeans with a chain coming out of them. (There was no air-conditioning in some of the auction house’s rooms, which had been decorated with greenery evoking the public park.) Mr. Avery wondered if he could sit down at his table alone. “There might be a rule in the etiquette book that we can’t sit,” Mr. Avery said. Slowly but surely, his dinner date, Lisa Maria Falcone, hobbled over on a pair of crutches. Historically, this is a big gala for Ms. Falcone. “I don’t get down to the High Line as much as I’d like,” she continued. “Especially with this injury.”

Ms. Falcone didn’t let an air cast get in the way of fashion, however. She was wearing a black Balmain jacket accessorized by a green pin that said “I Built the High Line,” a cream T-shirt by Generation Love and a pair of sparkling silver Balmain pants. But ah, the foot. Ms. Falcone said her husband surprised her with a Vespa. She misjudged it as a “mechanical bike,” and three minutes after she got on, she fell off.

From Edible School Yards To The High Line

Earlier From LMF: Lisa Marie Falcone Dances Like No One’s Watching
Lisa And Phil Falcone Have A Pig Who Can Play The Piano

(hidden for your protection)
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82 Responses to “Lisa Maria Falcone WILL NOT BE BROKEN”

  1. Anonymous says:

    pig in a blanket

  2. Anonymous says:

    I’m in love with a stripper….

  3. Anonymous says:

    bess you’re working so hard these days. when are you going to replace Kouweird

  4. Anonymous says:

    The beauty of Ms. L.M. Falcone and the thing that really, really attracts me to her is her “devil may care, but I don’t” attitude. That, and her sense of balance.

    –Mr. Phil Falcone

  5. Shatner says:

    Lisa, check the brake line.

  6. Anonymous says:

    I wonder where those stiletto heals have been ….mmmm….stilettos…

  7. guest says:

    Reminds me of a joke about the village bicycle.

  8. Louis Winthorpe III says:

    @8- Is the village bicycle kind of like a ZipCar?

    -guy who knows a thing or two about village bicycles but is very bored and would love for the joke briefer to explain to me what the “village bicycle” and how lisa resembles said bicycle

  9. derivative deviant says:

    not for me…shes too sun wrinkled.

    Now onto more pressing matters, Bess darling, when are you going to report (or “out” the fact) on the rumour/fact that banks are spinning out their inhouse hedge funds (aka best prop traders), and setting them up as independant firms… thereby bypassing any potentially new laws that inhibit banks from trading prop capital. Its all been too quiet on that front for my liking, and banks seem to be able to make money from the “said” investment, and also from providing these “funds” with prime services… I think the crafty bankers are way ahead of any regulation coming their way… which is a bit like watching an elephant charge at you, whilst knowing that its blind and will miss you completely due to the fact you are standing on the otherside of the highway.

  10. Anonymous says:

    Bessar, what ‘er ya wearin today, luv?

  11. Anonymous says:

    She looks so Elon Musk in that pic

  12. Anonymous says:

    a Vespa and a Schwinn look nothing alike……

  13. Anonymous says:

    LMF is a beautiful woman with a beautiful heart. She gives back to the city, is an attentive mother, and adores her husband, as he adores her. Make fun, but I assure you she is laughing all the way to the bank (and Balmain flagship store in Paris.)

  14. Anonymous says:

    i’d grip those handle bars

  15. guest says:

    @13 they all look the same upside-down.

  16. Anonymous says:

    Women are the fucking rake. Phil will be spitting blood eventually.

  17. Anonymous says:

    @14- Written by a typing pig.

  18. Anal_yst says:




    Hey Phil.

  19. Anal_yst says:

    Also, are you sure that’s LMF? I coulda sworn I saw that creature leaving Lucky Chengs a few weeks back.

  20. Anonymous says:

    I just love the clothes, so fashion forward Lisa

  21. guest says:

    You should never marry a woman you wouldn’t want to divorce.
    -Hungarian proverb

  22. JohnnyCage says:

    @12 nice
    @14 gtfo you kouwe_lyst

  23. Gilbert says:

    I like LMF

  24. Anonymous says:

    Who is the boy in that dress?

  25. Anonymous says:

    That old fable: “The kind hearted stripper”

    ” A fable is a succinct story, in prose or verse, that features animals, mythical creatures, plants, inanimate objects, or forces of nature which are … “

  26. Anonymous says:

    Marry, fuck, kill; Kouwe, Michaels, Shazar?

  27. Jaan Adams says:

    @14– I was thinking the same thing about Jocelyn Wildenstein– except for the adoring husband bit.

  28. so who here starting drinking at 9/10?

  29. nordsblatt says:

    How old is she? Really????????? Her face is plastic 30, her knees are near 50.

  30. Anonymous says:

    is that a dress or a weather balloon

  31. WTF says:

    @30 – when you get a bit older, I hope, for your sake, that you’ll realize there’s nothing inherently wrong with 50 year old women, especially those who clearly take some care of themselves.

  32. Anon says:

    She looks Mantastic!

  33. Anonymous says:

    U-S-A!!! U-S-A!!! U-S-A!!! U-S-A!!! U-S-A!!! U-S-A!!! U-S-A!!! U-S-A!!! U-S-A!!! U-S-A!!! U-S-A!!! U-S-A!!! U-S-A!!! U-S-A!!!

  34. Anonymous says:

    now we know for sure that he is trying to get rid of her!

  35. Anonymous says:

    # You are posting comments too quickly. Slow down.

  36. Anonymous says:

    @ 31- Either way shes’s hideous looking,and that bag she’s wearing, I’ve never seen something so horrid.

  37. Anonymous says:

    Victoria Beckham?

  38. Spoiler says:

    Given today’s football, I have had somewhere between 15-20 beers (hey, I work in credit derivatives, I can’t be expected to count) and I would still not fuck that with my dog’s dick. For the price of those shoes, I could buy 15 tranny hookers with more sex appeal, or enough Jim beam to make a hobo on the street corner look better than that.

  39. Anonymous says:

    I like a woman whose every move says FOAD.

  40. Anonymous says:

    @40 – that was a STRONG comment. Nicely done.

  41. Anonymous says:

    @40 ftw

  42. Anonymous says:

    @39 VB on meth

  43. JohnnyCage says:

    40 /bow

  44. Anonymous says:

    @ 40- Nice


  45. guest says:

    @40 clearly, you belong in structured finance.

  46. 123 says:

    I have to say, 1) her body is ‘uberskank,’ and 2) wtf, who in the name of all that is holy would choose that dress??

    I think I just threw up a little.

  47. 123 says:

    Ah, I just read @40. I rescind my comments, and choose to agree with him. Kudos, 40, kudos.

  48. Leeon Talley says:

    @48– Mon Dieu. Now was she just coming from that mechanical bicycle crash? She looks like wreck.

  49. Leeon Talley says:

    Wow, Balmain can smell a sucker coming from a mile away. @40 objects to the shoes?! The visual injustice is in the jacket.

  50. Fixed Income says:

    Lighten up someone’s first wife @ 14 or just a gay guy who is Lisa’s personal assistant (NTTIAWWT). We kid becuase we love that crazy broad.

    I suspect that in this story, Vespa is code for Sybian. Certainly any adoring husband gets that for his wife. Either way I bet she knows how to ride.

    – Fixed Income

  51. Anonymous says:

    @19, @20

    shut the fuck kouwanal_yst

  52. Anonymous says:

    she. looks. fucking. horrible…

  53. god says:

    @40 you are the man

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