Kurt Russell and Maria Bartiromo talk shop while Goldie Hawn wanders the room. [NYSD]
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There are more chins than people.
no, no, wtf?
Is still think Maria is hot.
“One more procedure and this bitch will have a goatee.”
My ole my, Maria, your arse is bigger than my horse.
KR: I know what we could do this evening..
MB: Really?
KR: Forget about Jon and it’ll be just you, me, your coconut tree..
MB: Excuse me…
KR: I’m sorry did I offend you?
MB: Fuck off, loser.
Nice to meet you Mr. Imus.
don’t look now, but Coutney Love is right behind you.
KR: Maria, see how she’s ignoring me? She hasn’t spoken to me since we conceived you on the set of Overboard.
You ain’t fat you ain’t nothin’.
KR: You know, Maria, I’m a licensed pilot.
“No, not that kind of cowpoke.”
“Maria, you look sooo good with this chewed-up monster next to you…”
Take off your glasses. Oh… wait, wait. Let down your hair. No: glasses on, hair back up. Let’s just get that hair right back up.
Let me turn the lights off. Is that better?
It just seems like there’s still light coming in from under the door.
Past sell-by date: the gathering
don’t make me get ‘mel gibson’ on your far a$$
You’re the Duke of NY.. You’re A # 1!!!!!
I swear to God, Snake, I thought you were dead.
Yeah. You and everybody else.
KR: Hot damn, right off it? Not a hint of chrome left?
“I just want you to know, Mr. Russell, that your favorite movie of mine, by far, is ‘Unlawful Entry.’”
“I’m picking up what you’re throwing down, sugar tits.”
Big Trouble in Little China – the financial ramifications
Jesus, Goldie.
@14, +1.
You don’t fire crazy. You never fire crazy. And never promise crazy a baby.
MB: I’m trying my new Sarah Palin look. What do you think?
@14 nice work.
–Not tricks, Kurt, illusions. A trick is something a whore does for money…. or cocaine…or a ride on the Citi Gulfstream!
“Are you the money honey one?”
Oh yeah they’re real. No collagen injections here. Want to feel them?
The drapes match the carpet? I’m in!
Yet another Bigfoot sighting with little more than a blurry, distant photo as proof.
“Nononono… I was Cash… Sly was Tango”
fine work anal_yst…best in a while
If you rub my “Snake Pliskin” long enough you’ll get a face full of money honey…
KR: “You’re shitting me!! You saw a rubber ring on Buffett’s wallet??
Doesn’t anybody give a f*ck what they look like anymore?
i remember like it was yesterday. summer of 1982. you told us you were 18, but we didn’t believe you. luckily no one cared.
9=win
“He pointed at his erect penis and ordered her, ‘Take care of THIS.’”
KR: Hey Maria! I lost a cow from my herd. She was all white with a gold bell on her neck
I think that Monkey Fist got to Goldie last night.
My wife picked this outfit. She’s got an eye for these things
Makeup! I woke up with this huge Bartiromo growing out the side of my head!
Really Kurt, you know the waitress who brought my coffee to our table?
Cowboy? Hmmm..no. Maybe if you dressed as a pirate…
They let me keep the patch from Captain Ron. What do ya say?
looks like someone whipped Goldie with a branding iron
KR: You jumped my bones the first night we met!
MB: We did it on the first date?
KR: Couldn’t call it a date really, we just did it in the parking lot of the 7-Eleven
MB: I’m a slut
KR: What did you say?
MB: Nothing
Whats a cow’s favorite stock?
Altria Group
Goldie looks good—NOT
“Look, I’m not telling you how to do your job, but if that DZ5 is on board, there’s gonna be a bomb attached to it, and you goddamn well better find it!”
@39 – looks like the kid’s got a helluva left hook. Get that lady some ice.
I;m not doing autographs right now, Kirk, but if you go to bartiromo.com and buy my book, “10 Laws of Enduring Sucess,” I’ll get my staff to send you a signed copy.
sure I can recommend a great guy if you think Botox is the way to go….just look how great Goldie looks
forefront: Sexecutive Decision
background: management guidance of MB in 10 years
Him: I have a private jet at Teterboro. And a ten pound bag of Chex Mix.
Her: Let me get my coat.
@46….I believe this.
@54 ROR
Are you my Mommy?
KR: No, no, the film is called “Sky High”, not “Mile High”
http://images2.fanpop.com/images/photos/3500000/Sky-High-Wallpaper-sky-high-3508946-1280-1024.jpg
What the fuck is that blonde thing in the background. Quickly analyze the specimen and deliver it to Jersey City to see what we can bribe for ratings and sell it to.
KR: “Get a load of that trap … don’t you just wish she would be raped by a pack of wolves!”
KR: Hey, aren’t you that crazy bitch that sent me love letters and your panties when I was a boy working at Disney?
MB: Yeah, it’s me all right.
KR: I bet you’re as crazy as ever.
MB: You can call me crazy, but if you remember I warned you. Everbody knows blonds don’t age well. I’m as perky as I was 45 years ago.
KR: Yeah, at least I never married her.
I smell a real gusher!!
KR: “I’ll say sorry but I’m not taking off my glasses.”
MB: “Why not?”
KR: “Becuz…they’re famous”
MB: But what I want to know is, would you commit new capital to the stock at this price.
@54 is the winner. Goldie looks like she’s been freebasing botox.
He: Suck me beautiful.
She: What did you just say?
He: Suck me beautiful!
[Maria laughs]
He: Friends call me Nova as in Casanova.
She: That’s pathetic!
He: Jeez you don’t have to laugh at me.
MB: You eyes are so… captivating under those glasses. Your gray hair frames your sensitive and leathery face so well. Oh, my, look at that double chin. Can I rub it?
GH to MB: i swear to god if that sqwaking bitch doesn’t stop eye-fucking my man i will punch her so hard in the face that her pretty little teeth will fall out like chicklets!!!
In her defence, Golden is 64.
- Guy old enough to remember Laugh In (barely)
* Goldie
- Auto complete thinks its so smart
@62
People are already sayin’ it was the best pahty evah
“Well little lady, It may be 4 O’clock but Jack Burton DOES know where his money is. It’s located at 6 O’clock.”
More Chin’s than a Chinese phone book. Yeesh.
Todd Thompson tells me you suck a mean cock, any truth to it Maria?
That look like Maria to you?
To me it looks like two monkeys humping a football.
One of my grandkids just got layed off at one of them Wall Street firms- got any connections to help her get a job- I can make it worth your while- show ya around a studio lot next time you’re out West-Goldie and I will even throw ya a little Hollywood party-invite Kirk Douglas to stop by- his kid has a movie comin out!
They met at a Halloween party. Kurt Russell came dressed as Roy Rogers and Maria B. wore John Travolta’s pantsuit from Saturday Night Fever. Goldie came as the cryptkeeper from tales from the darkside…
“Maria, I’d love to show you round the ranch when you can break away.Dont worry bout the ol lady if she acts up I’ll get a restraining order against her- we keep her medicated now that shes in her 70s- works like a dream only thing is she bumps into the furniture alot lookin for her meds.”