Survey says possibly and/or that they launched a stapler through the thing. From the mailbag:
Did someone lose their sh*t at 375 Park this morning? Heard a window was blown out (as in from the inside), on one of the upper floors. By the time I got there, looks like they had it patched up (guy was still on a lift though). Two people told me there was quite the crowd there this morning. Caution tape everywhere and tourists taking pictures.
Sorry about that, my fault. I was trying to get my copier to print in color. I forgot the Gov’t won’t let us spend money on that anymore. I was frustrated, and threw it out the window.
-Vikram
Could have been an empty bottle of Boone’s Farm.
@1 are you sure it isn’t because they cancelled the jewelry sale in the cafeteria?
Errant Hard racquets ball from across the street I’m afraid. My bad. Buy you a Pimm’s on the terrace to make up for it?
@1 – 399 Park is where Vikle tickles
Nothing of interest, somebody just had a normal reaction to Twilight and threw the book out the window – something Tom should’ve done.
You suck Lebron!
Never use the phrase “play handball” around an energy trader.
that was me who trew the chair, sorry. It was after analysts lowballed that wholesale inventory number. When it rains do we not all get wet? Fuck Salomon Brothers they’re hedgin their bets!
-guy drinkin the red bull
I did it. That window looked at me funny. Nobody looks at dis guy funny. So I gave that window the ole Rego Rope-a-dope. Boom! No more problems from dat window.
Chazzy Gas
Der Kommissar’s in town!
Can’t blame him for getting mad. Some people think they should go to heaven but NOT have to die to get there. Annoys the shit out of me.
It was me. I get the urge to do that sort of thing every now and then, don’t know why.
–Ralf Fensterbrecher
@2 this is not BofA
Dick Fuld was walking by the building after spending the day at an Irish bar on 2nd Ave. while he had a flashback on the hit his P&L took on a position on Seagrams bonds in 1980, and his inner gorilla caused him to lash out at the building while cursing Paulson grandchildren
@10 has it.
-DJ LIBOR
It was Mr. Eko
Hey Kool-Aid!
I did – was that wrong?? Should I not have done that?
That building is a dump.
Raymond James Jenious
Gang,
The last few weeks have been an “incredible” adventure in almost every venue in which we “conduct” our “business.” There is so much more to tell you about the events of the recent past and our more than exciting future. Over the next several days and weeks, we will be communicating much of that to you.
I am going to share with you a personal breakthrough, a “closed chapter” in my life, which does not relate directly to our business but does reflect upon how we all look at all the “stuff” that drives us on a daily basis. Many of you will think that I have lost my mind or have finally experienced a mystical intervention of “my feminine side.” I’m saying that you’re talking to people who seem crazy, and either I’m a tremendous relief to you, or this is a really elaborate joke on me, but I’m thinking you’re smart enough to get this joke, at this point, that you’ve gone crazy.
Some people think they should go to Dorsia but NOT have to die to get there.
Sorry, but that’s simply not how it works.
After all this “hassle,” I just came to the realization that there had to be a better way to “get” to where I wanted to “go.” So I looked into taking a private jet.
I have had a narcissistic, tough couple of weeks and have survived on pure estrogen in the midst of tumult, controversy, tough negotiations with business counterparts, and a grueling travel itinerary that was challenging even for me. One of the recent meetings was in Turkey – no Turkey unless it’s a club sandwich.
As I made my way into the main cabin I saw something so frightening it left me speechless. There, staring up at me from the ebony coffee table was a chrome dildo. AAAARRRGGGGHHHH!! Alone, on a boat, just me and this dildo. Terror on the high seas!
The dildo kept taunting me. I began to think that there must be something I don’t understand. What could it be? What is it all about? What if someone saw me? My macho reputation would be finished! I would be kicked out of the “bench press” section of the gym. My polo “compadres” would “ice” me and send me packing to the “pony rides.”
For you male Commenters, here is a brief synopsis. Miss, whore, piece of shit, stupid girl meets a handsome but moody giant vampire squid and against all odds they fall in love. Here is my macho take – Charlie Gasparino is a total genius. As I flipped through the pages I was startled by the lack of detailed description of Andrew and the surgical and illuminating development of Edward. Paul the vicious octopus liar – who can suck his own tentacles, and has, true story – predicted Team Edward to win.
The description of Andrew on the other hand, was not moving, or compelling. What I realized is the genius of Charlie was that he knew that by keeping the “character” generic, any and every woman could climb inside and picture herself in Andrew’s “shoes.”
And why, precisely, are people barking for her extinction instead of putting “Tony Hayward” or Lloyd LeBronkfein in their imaginary electric chair?
I definitely got that the “anticipation” was much more romantic and sexy than the “consummation” to the woman. Slow, patient, caring, tender…. In Soviet Russia you SHUT THE FUCK UP WHEN YOU’RE TALKNG TO ME. A human relationship with a giant vampire squid is “challenging” on many levels.
In a world of technology these “books” are unique, an explosion in your mouth that is just delicious. There is so little imagination left in most of forms of entertainment today, like Ass Traffic, Volume 9. But the entertainment press wants the repentant story: I bought a house, here’s my boyfriend, here’s my dog, here’s my yoga class, see, I’m nice, now. I take off my socks before I fuck the hookers now.
Here is my point. I would have never known how wonderful it is to fly a private jet if I hadn’t tried it out. That’s what I want you to do. If it’s for “you,” then wonderful. I’ve saved you some hassle, and you’ll find that you have more time to work on your business or relax. And if taking a private jet, is not your thing. Well, that’s OK.
It is time for all of us to become more “creative,” really find the “moment.” Anticipation is everything. The better you are as an “individual,” the better we will be as a team. Team Edward.
Move your cheese!!!!
If you thought we were motivated before tonight to bring the credibility small banks can wield on Capitol Hill, I can tell you that this shameful display of selfishness and betrayal by one of our very own has shifted our “motivation” to previously unknown and previously never experienced levels.
You simply don’t deserve this kind of cowardly betrayal. Do you really think Wall Street mega firms give a rat’s ass about Cleveland? Hell no. If you see LeBronkfein today punch him in the balls and say “Cookie Monster sends his regards, fucker.”
Don’t worry you’ll get “prettier” with make-up. You look cute in that. That looks “sexy” on you. But don’t eat the penis, it’s just a garnish.
I PROMISE you that our energy, focus, capital, knowledge and experience will be directed at one thing and one thing only:
NEVER AGAIN!
Cookie Monster
Majority Owner
TLDR LLC
(with apologies to NakedShort)
@20, could you just make it one paragraph next time?
it is Friday, I am tired, and we already have Bess do this sort of thing for us……wait a minute is this Kouwe trying to get his job back?
And once again Wall Street 2 gets pushed back…..
That was me. I just realized that bloomberg.com no longer has the option to switch back to the old black style.
Can somebody explain #20 to me please? Too much Adderall?
Sorry ’bout that. Had to get rid of the TV before Cramer came back on.
@12 There are only two things I can’t stand: intolerance of other cultures… and the Dutch !
It was the 24th floor…anyone know the tenant there?
@24 fucking pay attention. you only had to read 2 letters in the last day to get the joke.
Sounds like somebody took a page outta my book.
-John Thain, reluctant superhero
@ 20 A little choppy and inconsistent, but I laughed. Your Russian reversal: A+
In Soviet Russia bulding put hole in you!
-guy who loves to beat a dead horse
@31/NS Swallow my own Dentures.
- kindred spirit
In soviet russia window punches you.
375 Park, 24th Floor = Chuck Lee, retired Chairman and co-CEO of Verizon Here’s his phone # (212) 395-1825
hedge
@23 In the bottom left, “Go to the old version of Bloomberg.com”
@35. Weird. I knew that but it wasn’t showing up earlier. Oh well. Thank god.
Has anyone seen my Red Swingline Stapler?