This is the list of IR ladies. Read it and let us know what you think, but in doing so, try not to be so much, what’s the word? Like yourselves.
In related news, the woman at left is Jen, who’d just received her MBA and is looking for a gig as an Investor Relations/Marketing/whatever employee at a hedge fund. If you have an opening for her, do be in touch.
Hi….not you.
Hi
- Big Ern
question is..does she have an opening for me (hollow laugh)
Hollow Laugh Guy
Well, looks like we have a sorority princess here. Lots of make up, bet she’s a bit heavy from the waist down and is self conscious about it.
the pic of Antonella Napolitano looks like the opening scene of a diy sex tape
But you know, when I look at these contestants! For the IR Dimes 2010, I feel good! I feel good, because I know there’s a God somewhere! There’s a God somewhere! Turn around ladies for me please! You know there’s a God who sits on high and looks down low! Man cannot make it like this! Larry Flynt! Hugh Hefner! They can take the picture, but you can’t make it! Only God above, the Hugh Hefner on high, can make it for ya! Do you love Him?
Do you feel joy? Say Joy! Can I get an “Ahe-men”? Don’t be ashamed to call His name! Only God can give that woman the kind of joy she has right there! Make a joyful noise unto the Lord!
#3 looks like she has mumps
lift on #2, 10, 14
Too many shiksa blondes
@2 bugger…you beat me to it
good shout
tell her shes hired… send her to Geneva please
- Tax Exile Capital Management
@3 just how I like them, fat ass and insecure.
Bess, check out story about spy girl getting an offer to do porn.
Hooters girls discover algebra. Boom. Done.
~Guy who likes to write, “Boom. Done.” in his comments from time to time.
All of these chicks have at one point been in a Bang Bros video.
I’m serial.
the thing I like about IR Girls is that: every year I get older, but they always seem to stay the same age…
These are professional, aggressive women. They’re looking for nothing more than a one-night stand. No real names and no promises.
was fortunate enough to meet #10… and hopefully this list isn’t a ranking, b/c she’s definitely in top 3, if not #1
what about the lovely girls of bridgewater?
“Supposedly, if you throw a frog into a pot of boiling water it will jump out but, if you put a frog into water and gradually heat it up to a boil, it will stay in the pot and boil to death.”
@9 nice Mr. Gerst… quote
Tell her to take off the Irish sunglasses.
All of them, with the lights on, an a cow in the corner.
/Guy who does things with the lights on
RC Saint-Amour has sinced moved to the IR position at Handbridge Capital.
Does she know C++?
-S. Greenberg, Rebellion Research
Slores, the lot of them
3 girls on the list are hot, the rest, meh, but I’ll take Jen, lights on, roof of 200 West Street (nee 85 Broad), every day of the week.
Dear Jen,
HB or NHB?
I’d like to Shaq up with Victoria Lakers. She made me dribble. Hoops, they it is!!!! She ain’t no Kobe beef. I’d take the Buss to see her. I’d loan my box to Mel, too.
@anal_yst you’d still bang all of them.
@24 correction: anal_yst would try to bang all of them.
Jist a minit, now. These wimmin are prifishunnils in the finince industry! It isn’t feh to relyte to them with pervy sixual riferinces! Of course God gave them liggs and bums and fine clividged brists but He also gave them brines!! As they go forwudd in theh careers, they can do it with theh hids hild high because they hivv gryte idukytions in pirrents who provided ixcillint upbringins! Shyme on the lot of you for givvin them gryfe todye!!
~A Prominint Bissniss News Ryder Now in Minhittin.
Kouwe’s mom was so underrated.
1, 5, 7, 10, 16
- Guy who may be too picky and is thinking of recalibrating his standards
Drunk & sad outside of Le Ti.
@25 When you bench 250 lbs., they try to bang you.
In Soviet Russia, IR rubles list you!
In Soviet Russia, investors relation you
Brazzers is the new killin git
@24/25/30
I was out with one of the girls mentioned last night. I’ll leave it up to your imagination which one.
Bess: summer intern list?
Anal_yst, do you prefer girth or length?
Not really sure if I believe 7 is a woman. I feel like I’ve met her in Bangkok before.
@anal – I believe you, but too bad the correlation between “out with” and “got with” is zero.
Is it just me or is 3′s nipple off-center?
16 FTW
@ 39 In Soviet Russia nipple centers you
@5 has no one else seen coming to America? Randy Watson!
@38 They must be positively correlated.
props to @5!! Damn funny scene in a damn funny movie. God bless Arsenio!
~Guy Who Knows “Funny”
@34: whichever one you’re related to
OMG DOUBLE RAINBOWS!!!
@5/42 – I want ya to..I want ya to…CALL ME!
@43 hilarious
- guy who thinks statistics are funny.
buyer 16,7,10, & 1 in that order, short the rest. big disappointment
I think you and Jessica should start your own blog.
On #7, once they go black, we don’t want them back.
Another guy who just says things from time to time.
@49 so you got 4 new faces who you’ll admittedly rub one out to during lunch. take your “disappointment” and shove it up your ass.
Lovin’ it! Thanks Bess!
I’ve heard some of the best in the biz have been left off the list which means only one thing… There has to be another edition.
Overall great idea and well executed Bess and look forward to the next one.
Ladies #1,10,16.
My god, #1. It wasn’t fair for her to be first because it set the bar way too high.
I don’t get the appeal of #7.
-Guy who is examining his sexuality.
@ 49
sure, but you can´t expect them to be too hot, given the gig.
VC (SV) admins or ´boutique banking bitches´ would show better.
In Soviet Russia, HF IR sluts retire at 15
The cleaning ladies where I work look better than these bitches.
Bess, I love the fact that at some point today you have thought about your readers rubbing one out at lunch.
/Guy debating rubbing one out to a picture of Bess
#10/Melissa,
I would steal 4 copies of “Whitney” for you, and not even feel ashamed if I was caught by authorities.
All of my love,
-Guy that Needs to Buy that DVD
@60 Done.
ZK
[singing] “She’s your Queen-to-be. A Queen-to-be forever. A Queen who’ll do whatever his highness desires. She’s your Queen-to-be. A vision of perfection. An object of affection to quench your royal fire. Completely free from infection. To be used at your discretion. Waiting only for your direction. Your Queen-to-beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
Did #10 have her picture changed from this morning? I liked the first one better
Hold #10 and liquidate the rest of the portfolio
Bess – we need a hottest receptionist/PA list
Jessica Grad!!!
tits or gtfo
@18/SpecialK- I respectfully disagree. Although it pains me to say this, I think that our Handbridge IR girl should require a handbridge.
@67 May I refer you to #3?
@18,68 I have been waiting almost a year to hear back from Natalie Portman’s people. The position still hasnt been “filled”.
Lady at left Jen has potential but the flabby arms make her look older. Cover those arms until you get em in shape…perhaps try the Anal_yst training program.
@64 I agree, it’s been changed and certainly for the worst. The face seems pretty good although I don’t know if the negative correlation between seeing her face and her hotness can be ignored.
Number 7 is a tough call too as I think I’m strangley attracted to her but I don’t really know. She looks “fun” but could be big/look like a dude. I would give 1,16,10, and maybe 7 the nod though pending due dilligence.
- guy who lost his totem and is filled with uncertainty
Jen if you have an opening for me, then I have one for you ;>
dimes? more like 5.3674892644
Correction on the UVA girl, Pi Beta Phi, no Phi Beta Phi.
And Pi Phi does not tolerate that much root.
slides 1 and 16 SMILE AND BLOW ME. I DESERVE A WOMAN!
@76 The latest mixtape is pretty good too.
“I’m not giving you my house and you can rot unless you crawl back, s*ck my cock and say you’re sorry, in that order! Do you understand me? You f*cking offend my f*cking maleness, my masculinity, my being, my soul!”
Alissa Grad and Dorothy Crocker are in a total different league than most of these these unknowns. Full of class asset raisers and definitely make serious loot!
#78 reads hustler for the crossword. just sayin’.
this is insane. love the shiksa blonde comment – Alissa is Jewish and shihsa goddess gorgeous. i would make an exception for Bock.
#1) Lauren is spunky and hot. A mix of Danica Patrick and Kate Mara. Far and away best on this list.
#2) Jessica seems to be a glitch. I did not evaluate.
#3) With RC’s flowing jet black hair and non-descript swimwear, I feel like she belongs in a late-70′s Bond film.
#4) Elizabeth is probably upset this photo was used. Terrific eyes.
#5) Antonella – Tough image to work from. Incomplete Grade.
#6) Katie is so clearly Princeton material, I’m shocked her dress isnt black and orange. She comes from $ and good nutrition. A nice looking girl.
#7) Ashley is the most intriguing due to the incomplete phot. Cover her eyes for a sec – do you see J-Lo circa 2002? With the hoop earrings and mouth structure? Ash is hot.
#8) Becky White from Dallas probably likes beer. Everyone from Texas drinks beer heavily.
#9) Abagail – not my cup of tea personally. But mildly attractive.
#10) Melissa – Incomplete
#14) Victoria has just filedd suit against NY Magazine. There is no pulling punches – this photo is downright terrible. Terrible.
#15) Alissa looks like she belongs in Mad Men, becuase the chicks in Mad Men are generally hot.
Ok my quick take:
RC has a great rack, face isn’t doing it for me. Bock looks like a tranny (NTTATWWT), Kuga looks gross, Fochtman looks like she loves c*ock (certainly nothing wrong with that). Gordon could be hot, pending a better picture. Croswell makes me want to never be wealthy/stab my eyeballs out. Lakers has a mouth only a c*ck could love. Grad is fug.
Ok that’s a little mean (was meant to be funny), Lakers actually looks like she could be pretty hot. I maintain my positions on the rest in the absence of new information/pics suggesting any ratings changes are in order.
I would hire them all.
However, I don’t work for a hedge fund…
And there is no job
In light of a pic I’ve just been sent of Fochtman I’m going to have to downgrade her from A to B-, again, pending further pics.
If she gets +2′s i’m sure she will land a gig.
This slideshow is full of epic fail.
@84- I almost lost it at my desk and anyone who claims not to get that reference is a fucking liar.
Good for a little fap roulette at lunch. Rolled an Alissa. Win
Someone RC that it’s not polite to point…and that her tits are massive.
@84 nice
someone *tell*
-@90
Number 1 – might be perfect – plus she sails, any girl you can take out on the water and she can take over the helm automatically gets some consideration
@54, I’m with you, Bess only hit about 10% of my spank bank with this list, there are many other choices to expunge…
Jen, the girl at the top, looks like a trash whore. lol.. slut will blow her way to the top for sure
1 is hot, 3 is a pig, 5 is cute, 7,9,10 & 11 are whores, the rest are avg.
Becky White = New Rachel Hruska?
Bess – I hope you can confirm the story about one of the gals having an anal “incident” in college.
Are Alissa and Jessica Grad related?
size bid #1… and jen
@56 because she looks completely different in person
We need exactly the same thing for the girls in London!
Field trip Bess, c’mon!
@101 Seriously? You think there are 15 attractive girls in London?
I think this could be a really hurtful post. Look at some of the nasty comments. Did any of the girls participate in this? I can’t believe how nasty people can be. We should be celebrating the brains of these amazing women in finance and they’re beauty. Also, if anyone is interested I found after extensive google research that Victoria Lakers has the nicest feet of the group.
@103 And I found that #7 has a blanus.
I warned all of you 7 was a trap.
-37
@103
This is a celebration, of sorts, I take it you’re new here, eh?
These girls may have very nice personalities and be supremely capable in their chosen careers, but I’m worried if this is the cream of the crop. These photographs seem to “candid” shots, and all of these girls grew-up in the digital era, so there was plenty of exposure and practicing of how to pose for the camera. Since they don’t look great in these shots, the over/under on their catching the eye of anyone on the streets of NYC is low.
One of two were cute, but none would have even placed in the Nordic Combined, and certainly none qualified as hot.
On the positive side, since these girls are far from setting the room on fire with their looks, it is obvious that they’ve retained their positions because they actually have a degree of competency in their skill set.
Might I suggest the following future categories for consideration:
- Women of corporate event planning
- Women of Compliance
- 1st Wives
- 2nd Wives
- Girls that teach my daughters how to sail
- Boys of the SEC
- Bangkok Tranny Rickshaw Boys (I have lots of photos if you need them)
- Fat and decrepit old guy, on his 3rd marriage, pissed off that one of his analysts wasted my time by forwarding me this list with the hopes of currying favor.
Did anyone look at the firms these people work at – half of them are bogus and desperate- should have been limited to $1.0bn over. Bock works at some fund of funds. Conquest is D-List losers, FLAG capital puhleeze, and who ever heard of Forefront – what do these chicks DO all day? My group covers anyone with significance… While not all hedge funds, Halcyon, SAG, Golub and Apollo are real firms and hire real people.
@108 what is this “SAG” Capital you speak of?
@108 SAG = Screen Actors Guild, of which Golub’s Alissa Grad is a member?
re post 107- HILARIOUS. Why not “Women of Operations/Biz Mngmt”
Once went to a halloween party that Alissa was at. Looked unbelievable in some sort of thong lingerie outfit. She made it move.
@ 108 That was actually a typo for SAC – sorry fellas to clarify
@ 112 Nice – figures bc that Alissa Grad always is best dressed too. saw her on madison last week- high class fashion-ista.
Having also seen Alissa in panties, must vouch for incredible ass. Like eat sprinkles off it incredible. All you dudes are totally underrating her.
Are you good at Blowjobs? Yes
How regularly do you shave your pussy? weekly
DO you like taking it in the ass? Yes
abd one more question, do you shallow? Yes
When can you start? Tomorrow…
Many of these HF IR chicks are total poseurs, glorified sluts and hacks! They give the marketing role a bad name in the industry. Seriously now, as if anyone takes Grad seriously?
Funny – to know her is to love her. Alissa is the first and only real hot marketer. Take her seriously or not, it don’t matter bc she;s successful and makes some serious loot – we tried to hire her last year so I know…. And Kosta – aren’t you in jail because of your episode with Dreier last year? Talk about a hack.
@114, where does one go to see Alissa in panties? Why am I always the last to hear about these things?
-Guy who is always the last to know.