July 2010

  • Communiqués, News

    Viking Global Is Greatly Disappointed In Its Returns, Not Blaming Self, But Still Looking Within To See What Went Wrong

    To: Viking Investors From: O. Andreas Halvorsen Performance Our second quarter performance was a loss of 5.0% for VGE and a loss of 11.9% for VLF net of all fees on a composite basis On an unlevered basis, VGE’s long portfolio was down 11.2% and the short portfolio was down 10.3%, yielding a long-short spread […]

    / Jul 27, 2010 at 3:35 PM
  • News

    What To Tell The Judge When You Inevitabley Get In Hot Water For Hiring Prostitutes To Service Your Employees

    At some time in the future, near or distant, at least a few of you are going to have to explain why you brought in a bunch of prostitutes for your colleagues and/or clients. Given. The circumstances will vary, as will the types of girls hired (Peter likes brunettes, Jim wants someone who will call […]

    / Jul 27, 2010 at 1:39 PM
  • News

    Jerk Running Ferry To Fire Island Not Up On The Celebs Of Financial Reform

    Barney Frank is a pretty well-known Representative. But you know what? Some people just don’t keep up with the who’s who of Congress. Having said that, I’m pretty sure Mr. Frank did not go to the trouble of crafting this financial reform bill thing so that he could show up to various establishments (night-clubs, the […]

    / Jul 27, 2010 at 11:34 AM
  • News

    Here Are Some Thoughts On Men And Wall Street

    And the one way this thing can apparently be saved (think ‘e’). The Alpha-males running America are textbook examples of the Oedipus complex in action. Men? No, inside they’re still little boys who secretly want to win mommy’s favor by knocking off big daddy. Basic psychology, except they’re overdosing the real world with too much […]

    / Jul 27, 2010 at 10:50 AM
  • News

    Opening Bell: 07.27.10

    UBS Swings To Profit (WSJ) The bank swung to a profit of 2.01 billion Swiss francs ($1.92 billion) in the second quarter from a loss of 1.4 billion francs a year earlier. Last fall, UBS set out a medium-term target of 15 billion francs of annual pre-tax profit. In early afternoon trading in Zurich, the […]

    / Jul 27, 2010 at 9:30 AM
  • News

    Write-Offs: 07.26.10

    $$$ Pay Squeeze and Job Cuts Ahead, Warn Bankers [FN] $$$ Elizabeth Warren Would Be Bane Of Banks [NYT] $$$ This is happening: “Cast Members Angelina, Jenni “J-Woww,” Mike “The Situation,” Nicole “Snooki,” DJ Pauly D, Ronnie, Sammi “Sweetheart” and Vinny Ring The Opening Bell on July 27” [NYSE via Heidi Moore] $$$ Basel Committee […]

    / Jul 26, 2010 at 6:20 PM
  • News

    Ex-Trader Accused Of Fraud Hoping To Clear Name Via Reality TV Show

    Remember Ross Mandell, the Sky Capital founder who was accused of conspiracy and securities fraud in a scam that was (allegedly!) perpetrated using “boiler room-like tactics,” which could result in him going downtown for 25 years? He’s pretty sure he’s innocent and he’s like to share that innocence with the world.

    / Jul 26, 2010 at 5:00 PM
  • News

    Why Your Manager Is Putting Investor Capital At Serious Risk With A Sub-Par Pantry

    We all know of and, in some cases, have personally experienced, the dangers of the drunk trader, the strung-out trader, and the trader whose estrogen levels are running perilously low. But there is a vastly more dangerous condition under which billions could be lost, though for some reason it apparently merits little attention in the […]

    / Jul 26, 2010 at 3:10 PM
  • News

    Bonus Watch ’10: Barclays Capital

    Think of Dick Fuld, and realize it could be worse.

    / Jul 26, 2010 at 2:33 PM
  • News

    Area Man Wants 2008 Bonuses Returned

    Last Friday, outgoing Compensation Kitty-Cat Kenneth Feinberg made his “huge” announcement re: the bonuses paid out to bank executives for their bang-up jobs during the 2008 calendar year. Although some (mythical) people were supposedly quaking in their boots over what Feinberg was going to do to them, his announcement amounted to saying he’d crunched the […]

    / Jul 26, 2010 at 12:35 PM
  • News

    Will Martin Coward Start A New Hedge Fund With His New Gal-Pal?

    First, the back story: Martin Coward and Elena Ambrosiadou, currently in the process of getting divorced, were once partners in business and in marriage. They met at Cambridge, fell in love, and founded hedge fund group Ikos in 1992. Math nerd-cum-ladies man Coward was “the brains” behind the investment strategy and research, while Ambrosiadou, who […]

    / Jul 26, 2010 at 11:59 AM
  • News

    Patterson Calls Off Tax On Non-Resident Hedge-Fund Managers– WHAT WILL JODI RELL DO NOW?

    As has been previously mentioned, Connecticut Governor Jodi Rell wants a piece of New York-based hedge fund managers who don’t reside in the state. Earlier in the month she saw an opening when Albany proposed laying a $50 million tax on those managers only doing business in the state and she pounced. She started off […]

    / Jul 26, 2010 at 11:30 AM
  • Communiqués, MBAs, News

    Let’s Talk About: CFA Results

    Are you among the 42 and 39 percent, respectively, relieved? What will you be doing to celebrate? Running out and buying the next level of books during lunch? Not as lucky? Feeling like you just threw away the last four to six months of your life? Want to get angry? Want to make someone pay? […]

    / Jul 26, 2010 at 10:45 AM
  • News

    Opening Bell: 07.26.10

    Deutsche Bank Second-Quarter Net May Fall on Trading Slowdown (Bloomberg) Net income probably slipped to 1.05 billion euros ($1.35 billion) from 1.09 billion euros a year earlier and 1.76 billion euros in the previous quarter, according to the average estimate of 16 analysts surveyed by Bloomberg. Citigroup’s Risk Chief Learned The Hard Way (WSJ) As […]

    / Jul 26, 2010 at 8:30 AM
  • News

    Write-Offs: 07.23.10

    $$$ Four Arrested In (Long Island) New York Bank Fraud Scheme [WSJ] $$$ Stress Tests Show Regulators Won’t Clobber Banks [CNBC] $$$ Cuomo Reopens Probe of AIG’s Cassano [Bloomberg]

    / Jul 23, 2010 at 5:34 PM
  • News

    Should We Hold Out Hope For The Goldman Documentary?

    Probably not, but hear me out. Goldman is making a documentary about itself. Here’s why we really shouldn’t give rat’s ass: because Goldman is “paying for the film, has editorial control and is overseeing the project through its marketing department.” Also, it will only be distributed to employees, as a sort of pick me up […]

    / Jul 23, 2010 at 5:05 PM
  • News

    Bonus Watch ’10: What Kind Of Take Home Can You Expect For Turning In Your Ex-Husband For Insider Trading

    A couple months back we offered some advice to those considering taking up the insider trading game. It was that you strongly consider a) NOT discussing your activities with your spouse or b) vow now, no matter how bad it gets, to stay married to this guy or girl, ’cause if you don’t he/she will […]

    / Jul 23, 2010 at 4:46 PM

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