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Lloyd Blankfein’s Lucky Speedo Takes Home Another W

“This weekend, in a very exciting but non-publicized match at the Southampton Bath & Tennis Club, which is exactly the kind of club it sounds like, Goldman Sachs chief executive Lloyd Blankfein won a charity swim-a-thon. Mr. Blankfein, who is said to have used a very excellent flip-turn to his advantage, swam a pool-conquering 134 laps in one hour, according to a source.” [NYO]

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88 Responses to “Lloyd Blankfein’s Lucky Speedo Takes Home Another W”

  1. The weight of Mr. Blankfein’s testes gives him an unfair advantage executing flip turns.

  2. charles festerbottom says:

    exactly what kind of club does this sound like?

    CRF III
    Honestly confused as to whether there are racial undertones in this, and whether anyone should be checking their motives

  3. CoveredLong says:

    I’ve done like 1.34 laps in my life – color me impressed.

    -Obviously, I’m not a swimmer.

  4. Anonymous says:

    “A person at the club said that Southampton Bath & Tennis is private, and cannot be written about.”

    What a jo

  5. Bess Levin says:

    @4 I prefer the term j/off

  6. Anal_yst says:

    134 laps in an hr? Whoa, didn’t have gold-scrot for such an athlete.

    –examining motives (or whatever)

  7. WSJevons says:

    134 laps X 25M = 3,350M

    WR 1500M = 14:30 -ish

    I smell BS (unless LB can undulate the scrot as to create locomotion).

  8. Bess Levin says:

    @7 the author (of the original article) presumably confused “laps” (down and back) with “lengths” (one time across)

  9. Anonymous says:

    I’ve conquered 134 laps in an hour before

    ~Gianna from Beamers

  10. Anonymous says:

    Swam? BS!

    Obviously equipped as he is, he just walked.

  11. PermaGuest says:

    @7/8 Might also not be an Olympic-sized pool… although the golden scrot version of a dolphin kick could certainly be a factor.

  12. WSJevons says:

    @10, Of course! FTW!

    @8, go sharpen your occams razor

    – @7, aka guy who likes to think about undulating golden scrots

  13. Anonymous says:

    @ 7
    Mens WR 1500 = 14:30ish
    Womens WR 1500 = 15:40ish

    134 lengths in an hour is pretty pedestrian if you at all know what you’re doing. Power to him.

  14. Anonymous says:

    he was a fat bastard back in the day on the trading floor- amazing if he did even one lap

  15. Anonymous says:

    Assuming it is a 25m pool, that is 1:47/100m. Not necessarily fast, but I’m guessing that 99% of the people posting here couldn’t crank out 500m.

    @10, how you are confusing Lloyd Blankfein and Tim Tebow, I will never understand.

  16. Anonymous says:

    I’ve paid for 134 lap dances for some El Paso traders.

    ~A Certain Broker at a Certain Brokerage Company

  17. WSJevons says:

    @ 13, It takes 40-50 km / week and freakish talent to swim 14:30 at ages 18 – 26.

    Say his training is 3500 a day for 7 days a week – he is putting in 43% of the distance elite swimmers do.

    Say he there is a linear relationship between performance time and time in the pool. LB is putting in 50% of the work for a 18-26 year old to swim a WR.

    Lloyd is 56 yo and judging by his physique – safe to say that he was using the dolphin scrot.

  18. Landey says:

    Where’s the video of this?!

  19. Anonymous says:

    @15 Not confused at all. There’s only one man with a scrot amazing enough to sire Tim Tebow.

    ~10

  20. plang1 says:

    this was a kiddy pool right?

  21. Lloyd says:

    smallest pool ever!!!!

  22. Lap Pool says:

    I’m not
    finished read this yet, but it’s so fabulous ‘n I’ll back again when I was
    finished my job :D

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