You know, it was one thing when Obama broke up with James Dimon and started cavorting with representatives of other banks, like Vikram Pandit and Brian Moynihan, whose asses he essentially owns anyway. But now this? UBS, is he joking? And to play basketball, which he never invited JD to do and which he knows was a sport Big D excelled at in high school, making team captain junior year? Unnecessarily cruel. [AP]
Archive for August 2010
Guests at a Sunday night screening of Money Never Sleeps included hedge funder Jeffrey Epstein, who was greeted warmly by guests after he completed a prison sentence in June. “It was the first time he has been out in two years, but nobody blinked he was there,” a witness reports. “He was chatting to Jonathan Farkas, Wilbur Ross and Leon Black. He was sitting right near Rudy Giuliani.” Also there were moguls Stephen Schwarzman, Pete Peterson, Teddy Forstmann, Peter Brant and Martha Stewart, as well as TV journalists who cover them, including ABC’s Chris Cuomo, Bloomberg TV’s Gigi Stone and CNBC’s Maria Bartiromo. [NYP]
$$$ “The idea that Tony Blair is starting a bank or finance house for the super-rich is fatuous,” the statement said. “Tony Blair Associates provides strategic advice, on a commercial and pro-bono basis, on political and economic trends and governmental reform. Tony Blair provides advice within his areas of expertise. TBA does not hold itself out as offering investment or financial advice.” [Bloomberg]
$$$ Boyfriend of Ex-Disney Assistant Pleads Guilty In Insider Trading Case [WSJ]
$$$ Bonus Furor Took Big Bite Out of Top Bankers’ Pay [CNBC]
$$$ Flipper had a big weekend. [HP]
JPMorgan Brushes Off Employee’s Lawsuit Detailing Working For An Allegedly Racist, Sexual Predator Who Intimidated Underlings With His Gun Collection As No Big Deal
By Bess LevinBack in July, Kevin Dillon filed a lawsuit against his employer, JPMorgan, with a variety of complaints. Dillon, a “client processing specialist,” claimed that though he was well-liked and slated to receive a bonus and promotion, he was retaliated against for filing a report citing “highly questionable accounting and management practices” at Highland Capital Management LP and recommending that JPM cease “facilitating Highland’s improper practices.” The bank did not take Dillon’s suggestion and cut Highland loose, but what they did do was take away away his bonus, promote incompetents over him and offer negative but purposely vague reviews. Oh, and this:
In addition to the retaliatory action, Dillon cites two examples of “alarming behavior” by his supervisor. In one instance in 2008, the supervisor told Dillon he needed to clean “the mess” that was created by an African-American employee “who the supervisor admitted was hired primarily to combat adverse fallout from previous racial and sexual discrimination suits brought against the defendant because of the supervisor’s acts,” according to the lawsuit. In another instance, the lawsuit details how his unnamed supervisor allegedly discussed with Dillon the “wide array of guns he possessed and described to (Dillon) the violent acts he would commit if anybody crossed him or his family,” according complaint.
Today, JPMorgan has responded in the most awesomely dismissive way possible. Continue reading »
“This weekend, in a very exciting but non-publicized match at the Southampton Bath & Tennis Club, which is exactly the kind of club it sounds like, Goldman Sachs chief executive Lloyd Blankfein won a charity swim-a-thon. Mr. Blankfein, who is said to have used a very excellent flip-turn to his advantage, swam a pool-conquering 134 laps in one hour, according to a source.” [NYO]
As you know, it’s never too early to start thinking about bonus season. Those of you who took our bonus negotiation tips to heart and have been practicing them faithfully in the men’s room bathroom with your wing-man have nothing to worry about. Others should be soiling yourselves in fear. But take heart. Even if it didn’t penetrate when I said to open with a line such as “Listen up you motherfuckers, let me just cut right to the chase. This not my first rodeo. I have signed a hundred other bonus agreements that have been way bigger than this shit, okay? So nobody is going to be fucking bamboozling anyone with this lingo-jingo-fucking mingo” and even if you do work for a shop taking it up the tailpipe this year, you can still do pretty okay with yourself, thanks to a certain philandering sports star with a taste for skanks and an aversion to turkey. Continue reading »
-
Posted in:
Private Equity
Was A Certain PE Honcho The Object Of Michael Ian Black’s Ire Last Saturday Night?
By Bess LevinJust saying, he does love WWII-inspired humor, hasn’t missed a MIB set since discovering the comedian in his Sierra Mist arc, and needed a dark, safe space to let it all out. [Gawker]
Lloyd Blankfein Invokes Little Known Clause In Employee Exit Contract In Order To Sell Upper East Side Pad
By Bess LevinLloyd Blankfein’s housing troubles have been well-documented. Though safely ensconced at 15CPW for some time now, where nothing can hurt the billionaire and multi-millionaire residents and where no problem can’t be solved with soothing touch and a bedtime story by Sandy “4G” Weill, the li’l fella had been trying in vain to sell his 941 Park Avenue apartment for over a year. He and the wife, Laura, had originally hoped for $15 million when they listed it in June 2009, but saw no interest. They slashed it to $13.5 million and again, no bites, even after throwing in extras like Lucas van Praag serving as nanny/bartender three nights a week. What the Christ was Lloyd supposed to do? Continue reading »
From the mailbag:
Word is there’s some strange stuff going down on Mr. ESL’s watch. Five high up people have left just to go to Bloomberg alone in the past few months. He has in his head what a unit’s numbers should be, and if they come in better or worse he tells the unit head “You’re wrong, that’s not what I think it should be” and micro-manages based on his (false) sense of the numbers. Very strange, not trusting accountants’ numbers, no? Many people there are seriously questioning what’s going on.
When Kristin Davis first made the bold claim she’d be running for governor of New York State, it was admittedly an attempt to get back at her arch-nemesis, Eliot Spitzer. It frosted Davis’ cookies like no other that the man she supplied– ballparking it here but possibly– thousands of hookers with, in her role as the city’s foremost madam, did no jail time, whereas she was behind bars for months. Figuring Ness would eventually get that old itch to hold office again, she announced she would take him down. Unfortunately, Davis underestimated how much of a time commitment Spitzer’s Slate gig would be, leaving him precious little for a campaign. And besides which, no one thought she’d actually be able to get on the ballot. Well think AGAIN.
Kristin Davis, the ex-madam who supplied call girls for Eliot Spitzer when he was attorney general and governor, has gotten herself on the November ballot. Davis procured 23,000 signatures – more than the 15,000 required – in support of her candidacy as an independent challenger to Andrew Cuomo. She’ll be the first woman in New York history to run for the office while on probation (for one count of promoting prostitution in the third degree).
Lest anyone have it in their heads that Davis lack the qualifications to run New York State, please recall that KD 1) “Was valedictorian of [her] high-school class 2) “Worked 10 years in finance [as] vice president of a hedge fund 3) “Went on to build a multimillion-dollar business from snatchscratch.” Continue reading »
MBAs
“Other Than That, I Have No Concerns”m
By Bess LevinContinue reading »
Tags: CPA v. MBA v. CFA, do it in the middle of the night, don't tell anybody, FASB, Mark-to-Market, other than that I have no concerns, stop asking for public comment on this crap