Russian Spy Anna Chapman, Her Ass, In Trouble Again

Her LinkedIn profile claims the former Barclays employee-cum-Russian Spyshe’s “full of self-control” but that doesn’t exactly seem to be the case. Everyone’s favorite Ruskie (whose fan base includes Dr. Doom, the Oracle of O and the man, the myth, the legend, the grand high poobah of it all, Cookie Monster himself) has been sued by Russia’s Heat magazine. And for what? Unauthorized flashing of ass, which the Eastern Europeans do not look kindly on.

Apparently Chapman posed for an upcoming spread in the glossy this week and despite being expressly told to keep the photos, such as the one at right, under wraps, couldn’t help herself and posted them to Facebook. Once word got back to the little lady that she was in some serious trouble she deleted the pics and informed her friends and followers that they’d be in some serious trouble were they distributed as opposed to just being used for Russian spy fantasy fodder, or as a supplement to Ass Traffic: Volume 9. Anywho. Here’s a behind the scenes clip of the shoot, for any lonely economists missing AC.

Ex-Russian Spy Anna Chapman Doesn’t Want You To See These Photos, Wink Wink [AMNY via Gawker]

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106 Responses to “Russian Spy Anna Chapman, Her Ass, In Trouble Again”

  1. Guest says:

    I’d tax that ass like the IRS.

  2. Guest says:

    I buy. Take it and bid it.

    –Guy who likes Wallstreet quotes today.

  3. Sauceness says:

    Anyone else hear Mark Haines’ attempt at an Australian accent this morning? Might have been the most painful 3 minutes in television history. How is this guy employed?

  4. Sauceness says:

    Anyone else hear Mark Haines’ attempt at an Australian accent this morning? Might have been the most painful 3 minutes in television history. How is this guy employed?

  5. guestosaurus says:

    “it moved”

  6. Apocalypse Futures says:

    I would with the lights on and Vladimir Putin in the corner snapping photos for Anna’s facebook profile

  7. Apocalypse Futures says:

    I would with the lights on and Vladimir Putin in the corner snapping photos for Anna’s facebook profile

  8. hedgehog says:


  9. Choadely Willard says:

    It moved and is still moving.

  10. Choadely Willard says:

    It moved and is still moving.

  11. Well, when I put on heels, a form-fitting dress, bend halfway over while arching my back in the opposite direction, and have the porno photographer shooting at all the right angles, my ass doesn’t look half bad either.

  12. NakedShort says:

    Prove it!!!!!!

  13. Anonymous says:

    Was this an actual thing he was doing i.e. announced he’d be speaking w an aussie accent today? please say yes.

  14. Anonymous says:

    That is a bubble ass of epic proportions.

  15. Guest says:

    55 minutes and no “soviet russia” jokes, that has to be a new record.

    Other than that, I have no concerns.

  16. Choadely Willard says:

    He was trying to be funny and was failing miserably. Very uncomfortable to watch.

  17. Could play Beirut on that.

  18. Chocolateman8823 says:

    i have a chubby

  19. guestosaurus says:

    more like a boxing kangaroo cought under a bedsheet

  20. Anonymous says:

    can’t think, peepee standing up

  21. I’m just saying, an appeal to temperance here, that, while her ass is nice, and I would probably not even have to be drunk to hit it, her ass is certainly not in the top 10 or 15 percent, given a normal distribution, and I would seriously question someone’s sanity that would consider that to be a truly “epic” ass, and I would certainly, at least, wonder how one could think so given the ten trillion truly epic asses available with a cursory Google search.

    -greg williams’s sentence-structure-protege

  22. ChicagoChick says:

    Yeah XOPD! ass or GTFO

  23. J Farley says:

    What a bimbus.

  24. UBC says:

    Bess: Do we have any vids with less clothing? Thanks.

  25. Choadely Willard says:

    Kouwe, you didn’t really right all of those words, did you? Come on, you can tell old Choadely!

  26. BackOfficeSales says:

    In Soviet Russia, former Barclays employee-cum-Russian Spyshes get cummed by Russian Spyhes

  27. JagFalcon1313 says:

    Spy business is more and more appealing to me! Does anyone have bonus info?

  28. Assume the position says:

    In Soviet Russia, resume is your ass.

  29. guest says:

    I think I get what you’re saying. It’s a good ass….. but it is certianly not world class. She’s a decent looking girl who maybe get’s a spy premium. However…. still would sans alcohol.

  30. Guest567w says:

    A touch of photoshop makes you look like Quasimodo sat on yo’azz.

  31. Anonymously says:

    the best “in soviet russia” comment of all time

  32. Jennifer Italia says:

    I’ll bet Anal_yst slept with her while she was in the U.S.

  33. Guest of a Guest says:

    I do, but if I told you I’d have to kill you.

  34. Anonymousse says:

    When is Mark Haines not uncomfortable to watch?

  35. Choadely Willard says:

    Bessar, I wanna say like 9:30ish, but I am not a morning person so don’t take that as gospel.

  36. BackOfficeSales says:

    so hurt right now

  37. Choadely Willard says:

    That video needs a couple of Shake-Weights and less clothing.

  38. Anonymous says:

    As I was standing on the corner of Christopher Street and Washington, a young bird by the name of Anna approached me one day. She looked just like in the picture, except that she was black, which I attributed to the lack of photoshop.

    Anna told me if I had some use for 250lbs. I told her “I bench 250lbs”. She was impressed. She then proceeded to bend halfway over while arching her back in the opposite direction. I knew what that meant. I lifted her left cheek, then the right one. That was no 125lbs. I estimate each cheek at least 150lbs, a personal record. I did my deed, then handed over a $50. She reminded me I could get herpes only once and graciously climbed into the back seat of a black SUV.

  39. NotAGuest says:

    In Soviet Russia, that is where Anna be.

  40. NotAGuest says:

    In Soviet Russia, that is where Anna be.

  41. WSJevons says:

    I implore you to follow BL’s link over to CBS and watch the video. It is indeed in the top 10%.

  42. Von Sloneker says:

    Over under on Russian Playboy shoot?

  43. Landey says:

    Ugh. White bra and Hanes Her Way panty lines? Don’t ever come back to my country.

  44. NKVD1938 says:

    In Soviet Russia, we call her “грязная шлюха.”

    And there is NO WAY WHATSOEVER that my boy Bad Vlad did NOT hit that.

  45. guest says:

    In Russian Sexy Ass Photograph YOU!

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