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Hedge Fund Investor Relations Chick Arrested For Running Pot Farm Out Of Her House, Claims It Was Actually A Petting Zoo

As recently as the beginning of last week, Tara Bryson worked in the investor relations department of Connecticut-based hedge fund New Stream Capital. A couple days later, the firm, which is owned by her brother, suspended Bryson pending an investigation into the matter of her being arrested for growing weed in her backyard (the narcotics task force referred to the set up as “a complex marijuana cultivation operation capable of producing a marijuana crop year round”). Bryson was charged with possession of marijuana, cultivation of marijuana and conspiracy to cultivate marijuana, while her live-in boyfriend got seven felonies, including “possession of a silencer for firearms and operating a drug factory.” But, you know, that’s just like the cops’ opinion. Hearl clearly being the brains of this operation says he and the GF are innocent and that the charges are “bogus.” And he can prove it with a couple of exceptional excuses.

1. The duo “didn’t have that many plants” and

2. Oh, they’re farmers but they’re not weed farmers, they’re goat farmers.

Hearl said they did have a home business–goat farming. Last year Bryson registered the property with the Connecticut Farm Bureau as Butterfield Farms — named after the street she lives on. The site, promotthegoat.com, says Bryson and Hearl are striving to become a local supplier of goat product including cheese, milk and yogurt. Bryson received a $49,999 grant from the state to help get the farm going. Hearl told Forbes the business isn’t off the ground yet and they don’t have a license to sell goat products. But they encourage visitors to stop by their five-acre lot and visit the goats. The arrest report says they have surveillance equipment on the property.

Bryson and Hearl took their goat farm website down sometime this weekend but presumably they’re still welcoming visitors to stop by (and now that the couple’s 22 cal. rifle, 20 gauge shotgun, 22 cal browning handgun, two 9 mm handguns, handcuffs and about 200 rounds of ammunition have been seized there’s nothing to be worried about with regard to getting gunned down).

Executive At Troubled Hedge Fund Arrested For Running “Complex” Pot Farm In Her House [Forbes]

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39 Responses to “Hedge Fund Investor Relations Chick Arrested For Running Pot Farm Out Of Her House, Claims It Was Actually A Petting Zoo”

  1. Guest says:

    So they can go blow goats at their leisure…

  2. Anonymous says:

    That’s right.

  3. Baa Baa says:

    spelled promote wrong.

    other than that, I have no concerns.

  4. black ghost says:

    at this point trash fund managers need to sell drugs to keep up with invester withdraws

  5. guestosaurus says:

    If they got they’re own water supply I’m in!

    Burry AKA “the Big Short”

  6. Mark Lowe says:

    So David Bryson hired his sister for IR? Where’s the fun in sexually harassing a sibling?

  7. Supraman says:

    So I don’t need a license or anything. Just get five acres with a couple goats and the state of CT will hand me a $50k grant?

    That’s a pretty solid deal.

  8. guestosaurus says:

    the endproduct would be spacecheese – the spreadable delight your teenagers will love

  9. Guest says:

    It might be fun if you were stoned enough…..

  10. Guest says:

    Nothing about this isn’t bullshit. Cops wanna snatch my crops…

  11. charles festerbottom says:

  12. guest says:

    the cached web page, http://bit.ly/aVKMwb

  13. Guesty says:

    nope – thats not her, she likes cakes as well as pot (allegedly)

  14. Guest says:

    If they were really dealing drugs they would have had actual guns.

  15. Mark Itcall says:

    Yo, man, I’m comin’ up to pick up my “Goat Cheese”, dig?

  16. Anonymous says:

    a presumably not-offensive looking lady who actually grows things to make me fat and happy?

    viagra pill with a face if i ever saw one

  17. i know fat when i see it. and bryers ice cream in profile pic = fat chick

  18. Anonymous says:

    Bess: i say day trip to the farm and Beamers on the way home

  19. NKVD1938 says:

    Good god, what is the world coming to? This shit happens in Connecticut!?!? When I hear terms such as “live-in boyfriend,” “firearms,” and about one’s residence being used as a “drug factory” the first choices for the locale that come to my mind are generally places where the State flag still incorporates part of the Confederate ensign and where “intelligent design” is a selectable major at the State U.

  20. Guest says:

    Kids these days…

  21. Anonymous says:

    Don’t forget the tax break you’ll get from classifying your 5+ acres in Westport as “agricultural land”

  22. Anonymous says:

    You ever been in, say, Waterbury??

  23. Carl Smith says:

    i cant believe i wasted my time reading this

  24. LordHumongous says:

    Can I churn the butter with my phallus?

  25. Anonymous says:

    Only if you record it to the tune of Weird Al Yankovic’s “Amish Paradise”

  26. UBS_Sales says:

    Put that on a TRS. Lever it up 5-10x.

  27. SPP says:

    don’t let the door hit you on the way out…

  28. Anonymous says:

    investors would have to be on drugs to give these people their money anyway…

  29. Grabyourgoat says:

    Just spent some time in Newtown. It’s not at all like waterbury (and pretty rural and nice).

    The key question here is, of course, whether she’s truly hot.

  30. plang says:

    more trash fund garbage………….

  31. Ignora_mouse says:

    Whom do I contact at your esteemed firm to get a sample termsheet?

  32. #9 says:

    Why is Forbes publishing this article, wouldn’t it be more appropriate fodder for say, High Times?

  33. Eximious1 says:

    This is just a smokescreen to distract investors and regulators from the real improprieties that have been transpiring at Newstream for a long time…

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  35. i7YlLI A round of applause for your blog. Keep writing.

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