And if you thought it was just secretaries bearing getting the boot, think again!
The cuts were “across the board,” including partners and portfolio managers. And they weren’t just something David came up with on a whim over lunch but part of “a strategic review undertaken by management as a result of large investor outflows this year.” So, there’s that.
DE Shaw Cuts 10% Of Workforce [FT]
Hard Times For DE Shaw [II]
this stuff happens at DE Shaw all the…oh.
How many employees did they have at peak to lay off 150 in one fell swoop, jesus?
Guess those at JPM should not be forwarding their resume to DE Shaw now.
this is…this is a bummer
Don’t ask me.
Look on the bright side, this is a force for economic innovation and entrepreneurship.
New hedge fund managers just created: 5-10
New taxi-cab drivers just created: 2-3
New bartenders just created: 4-6
New “I’m researching a great new business idea” slackers: 7-12
New applications at TD Ameritrade: 2
New web-cam participants: 3
New bloggers: 4-5
This would never happen at Primerica.
New junkies: the rest
Remember: Lee Iacocca was fired. Tom Landry was fired. Steinbrenner fired Billy Martin 4 times. Donald Trump fires people all the time. The captain of the Titanic was fired posthumously. Numerous millionaires have been fired or “let go” in their lives. Because your former employer cares, you get this outsourcing service. This is a painful experience, I know…probably not as painful as jumping onto a bicycle that doesn’t have a seat, but painful nonetheless. As you go forward remember how stressed your still employed colleagues will be. Take some comfort in the fact that you really are more useful than teats on a boar hog, as they say at Tullet Prebon, but I digress. Be what you can be. You are free now! Someone…somewhere out there needs a boar hog’s teats. They just don’t know how to find you!
-Frank Drebin
Regional Manager-NE Shitcanning
Omaha Shitcanners, LLC
69 Dodge Street
Omaha, NE 68750
All those MBAs, PhDs, CFAs …….Whenever they feel like criticizing any one…just remember that all the people in this world haven’t had the advantages that they’ve had. (I’ve been drunk for about a week now, and I thought it might sober me up to shit in a library.) Let me tell you about the very rich investment banker/traders with their mentoring and their legacy. They are different from you and me. They possess and enjoy early, and it does something to them, makes them soft, where we are hard, cynical where we are trustful, in a way that, unless you were born rich, it is very difficult to understand.
F. Scott Dumas
Let me rephrase. How many executive bonuses were saved as a result of 150 layoffs?
so much for all the recovery storys!
Good more jew scum without money!
Gotta make room for the Big Guy.
1500 if you include the ~700 or so that were in india when i was around
At first I was thinking this site needs a “dislike” button–but then just letting your ignorant statement stand for all to see is more rewarding.
If you were a trader, quant, portfolio manager at D.E. Shaw, you can write your own ticket. These guys will find new high-paying jobs easily.
Does your mom know you’re on the computer? Seriously, dude, cram for the SATs and try to get into a good (meaning without “CC” in the name) college more than 3 miles from home so you can learn something about the world. It will help you in your career at the groceryvstore, where you will meet people of all races and religions.
That was meant for “lick me”.
So you lost your job at D.E. Shaw? How does it feel to be writing your own ticket tonight with tear stains on it?
Spoken like someone who has never had a job and therefore unable to understand the full impact, economically and emotionally, of losing a job.
Hoping Derivatives sentiments are true and D.E. Shaw former employees get on their feet quickly.
hmmm…this is a great business model – I hire you to write a couple of programs; keep you around for a few years to make sure they work properly and create alpha; then fire you once we have everything running properly. oh, one more thing: if you want that serverance, be sure to sign the non-compete so I don’t have you recreating the model at some other shop.
I try to mock you no more than necessary, but, seriously, what point about “-10%” do you not understand?
Please, pray for the quants
How did you guys enjoy sleeping in today?
Anyone know if there were any US layoffs? I heard they were all in London.
lost of layoffs in US as well.
opps lots
If the DE Shaw employees were so smart, what probabilities did they put on their own unanticipated departures?
tons of layoffs in NY HQ.
Tons huh? So were they all overweight and slow to run, so they got thinned from the herd?
5 standard deviations, because they felt they were “too smart to be laid off”. They need to subscribe to the mantra that “You are not your job. You’re not how much money you have in the bank. You’re not the car you drive. You’re not the contents of your wallet. You’re not your fucking khakis. You’re the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world”.
Sorry for the self-reply, but I just realized that the quote needed to be edited for DE Shaw speak. The quote should have been “You are not your algo. You’re not how much money you have in the P&L. You’re not the bar car you ride. You’re not the contents of your program. You’re not your fucking Bonobos. You’re the all-singing, all-dancing first year analyst of the world”.
BOO HOO BWAAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAA
Don’t hurt yourself
Blow me
This is the firm that asks prospective employees for SAT scores…
I always thought that was funny. HR would call and say “we don’t give a fuck about mangna cum laude from MIT, that only got us to look at your resume. We only want to know what your SAT score was before we hire you”.
Apparently one of the board members is also on the conference board that makes the SAT exam. Therefore, he correlates SAT score with job performance. Clearly, he needs to revisit the ANOVA on that regression.
No.
glad i didn’t get that job there i applied for two months ago – WTF are they doing hiring two months before massive layoffs?