Back in March, Lindsay Lohan filed a suit against E*Trade, claiming that the baby in the brokerage’s latest commercial was based on her life. Lohan came to this conclusion because the character’s name is Lindsay, she’s referred to as a “milk-a-holic,” and there’s a suggestion that the young one is a man-stealing tramp (she also claimed that though the name “Lohan” is never mentioned, she’s attained first name recognition. Plus, the stuff about the baby being a strung out slut). For the grave offense, Lohan demanded the spots pulled, and $100 million for the emotional distress they caused her.
At the time, E*Trade said the bitch be crazy, and claimed that they used the name Lindsay because it’s “a popular baby name” and not because they were trying to insinuate that Lohan is some sort of strung out whore (baby). They also shot back that Lindsay does not have “one name” recognition like “Madonna” or “RuPaul” or “Lloyd,” and that the commercial could have been about any one of the 250,000 people named Lindsay in the U.S.
Lohan’s lawyers responded that the issue isn’t “how many people in the USA are with the name ‘Lindsay’,” the issue was “how many celebrities are with this name ‘Lindsay’ in the USA, and then in the context, manner, characterization, persona.” For instance, when you take the name “Tiger” and put it in the context of golf or proclivity skanky ass bitches, it’s obvious you’re talking about Tiger Woods. To that end, it’s apparently patently obvious that when you have the name “Lindsay” in the context of an alcoholic “bimbus” (the lawyer’s words), we’re talking about Lindsay Lohan.
And apparently…that logic may have worked! Allegedly, a settlement between Lindsay and E*Trade has been reached and ole one name is said to be “very happy with the results.”
I fucking hate people.
Weathered and sagging is setting in already, I see.
You’re a fucking ugly bitch. I want to stab you to death
I just love pic.
and then play around with your blood.
-PB
Crap, now I can’t think now that my member is erect.
Let’s check back in 8 or 9 months and see if any of the E-Trade lawyers have a new gig in Hollywood.
Thanks for clearing up that that was a quote by patrick bateman.
TMZ has already reported the settlement:
Two (2) bottles Absolute Red
Three (3) grams Bolivian Marching Powder
Five (5) 15mg tabs Oxycodone
One (1) bottle Champaign (White Star)
Two (2) condoms, used
Twelve Dollars, Fifty-Five cents ($12.55) cab fare to get the FUCK OUT OF THE ETRADE OFFICE
I only had sex with her because I’m in love with you.
-Sean Bateman
Absolutely no way she got any money. E Trade agreed to a gag order so she could try to save face, but she got nothing, guaranteed.
Can the people of the United States file a class action lawsuit against her for making The Parent Trap or is statute of limitations expired?
The settlement agreement provides $1,000,000 in an E-Trade account for the personal use of Ms. Lohan with the sole proviso being that she makes at least 10,500 trades per month.
One of these days Bessie we are going to grab a drink in West Village, we are of the same age and although I’m slightly more attractive I find you fascinating.
No matter what the settlement was, she is still Linsay Lohan, which has to suck.
LOL at Bess ever having a drink with you, tool shed.
Cocaine is a very powerful drug
Counter suit – she touched me where the teacher said she shouldn’t.
Slore!
And further stipulates she use LeBouf Capital Mgt to run the account.
Dear OptionsTrader,
You are the worst.
Dear OptionsTrader,
You are the absolute worst.
She should really look in to Wu-Tang Financial
definitely hardwood flooring on this one……lights on, camera on, three condoms on……..i just love the crazy bitches!
I’m short coke in LA in anticipation of her re-imprisonment–citywide demand will drop sharply while she’s behind bars.
I thought you work in Dallas?
“hell’ave drug” – what did 5 fingers say to the face, slap!
I honestly don’t know which I love more: befreckled ginger ho’z or online discount trading
That’s because it’s from 2004
And?
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