He “picked her up in a Maserati and she said well maybe I can get used to this.” Let’s make this happen.

Subject: Meeting Request: Reality Television Potential

Entertainment Executives,

My name is Jon [redacted]. First off I enjoy your company’s work which is why I’m writing to you. I’m from North Carolina and “moved” to the city a couple weeks ago and started working at a media company in NYC last Monday. I say “moved” because currently I am going from couch to couch from NYC to Hoboken until I find a place. The girl that I’m staying with is the focus of this email. Her name is Bobbie and she’s 25 years old. What I’ve seen her do in the last month is so amazing it’s something that has to be shared. She has managed to play 4 different men, one being an NFL star, and live the most unreal life anyone could live while still being low profile. I met her at my last job when I worked in Charlotte, NC and she’s cool as hell so we’re still really good friends. Only friends. But just seeing the craziness in her life is something that anyone would love to see and I know you would feel the same way. This is NOT a joke. Please continue reading.

[...]

Then there’s a 34 year old Asian American VP at Goldman Sachs. This is not her type of guy at all. She loves a big black man who’s in shape and has a little thug in him. That’s all she’s ever dated. So why is this guy in the picture? Because he has spent over $50,000 dollars on her in the last 2 months. When she first got here she went to a bar by herself a few times and got hit on by a few people when she went but wouldn’t really give them the time of day. One night this guy comes up to her and she was just like fine, and for some reason said yes when he asked her out on a date. When he came to pick her up he picked her up in a Maserati and she said well maybe I can get used to this. They went to dinner at that restaurant in the city that’s high in the air and that floor rotates so you can see all of NYC while you eat. He bought 2 $650 bottles of Champagne during dinner. She has still been “talking” to him but has no attraction to him. He has taken her on shopping sprees and whenever she mentions wanting something he usually has it for her the next day. Louis purses, a $6,000 dollar limited edition Coach purse, 2 pairs of Christian Louboutin shoes, the iPhone, Blackberry Torch and Evo and pay for her lines on 2 of them. She has gotten much more than that but there is a picture attached showing a few of the things I mentioned. The crazy thing is that the only thing they’ve ever done is kiss. Never past that. She has him on a string and only sees him when she feels like it. And she has other guys to worry about. When I started drafting this email I was at her apartment and she left with this guy to get a massage and go shopping in the city. Attached are a couple of pictures of her getting into his car. She came back with over $1,000 worth of clothes and shoes. I actually like this guy a lot. I had drinks with him the other night because maybe he can help my company in some way because he’s very smart and and knows all things digital. He’s meeting with our business development team next week.

The Craziest Reality TV Pitch You’ll Hear This Week [Gawker]

41 comments (hidden to protect delicate sensibilities)
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Comments (41)

  1. Posted by JerseyShorePatrol | September 1, 2010 at 10:03 PM

    Just work her into the next season of Jersey Shore somehow…

  2. Posted by Anonymous | September 1, 2010 at 10:06 PM

    “She loves a big black man who’s in shape and has a little thug in him”

    ANAL_YST GO GET HER!!

  3. Posted by Conventional Asian | September 1, 2010 at 10:26 PM

    Conventional wisdom on dating Asians – “date Korean, Marry Chinese.” I’m betting this guy is Korean.

  4. Posted by just sayin... | September 1, 2010 at 10:55 PM

    How do you know this is fake? Goldman guys don’t spend their money on anything but horse farms, hedge trimming, and and apartments in 15 CPW.

  5. Posted by ExtraOrdinaryPopularDelusions | September 1, 2010 at 10:57 PM

    someone should explain to this asian that there is a reason people make 14 inch black dildos

  6. Posted by icteric | September 1, 2010 at 11:06 PM

    dinner at the revolving marriott in times square. wonder if they had the mozzarella sticks.

  7. Posted by Smartguy | September 1, 2010 at 11:06 PM

    34 and VP? This has gotta be fake. If he was over 30 and still a VP he would’ve left for Raymond James to be an MD.

  8. Posted by Anonymous | September 1, 2010 at 11:37 PM

    “Then there’s the guy she met here. He lives nearby in Jersey and she met him around the same time she met the asian guy. This guy is half black half asian and not usually her type but he’s a tall jacked dude who’s real chill. They hang out once or twice a week and they hook up and all that stuff.”
    Tiger is loving the single life.

  9. Posted by Guest | September 2, 2010 at 12:18 AM

    is that a real thing?

  10. Posted by Traderface | September 2, 2010 at 1:01 AM

    Was his name David Park?

  11. Posted by Guest | September 2, 2010 at 1:24 AM

    The only other hit for this string on Google is datingfatwomen.com

  12. Posted by InfiniteGuest | September 2, 2010 at 1:40 AM

    Pretty sure there’s already a Nintendo DS video game about this girl. but maybe it’s only available in Japan.

  13. Posted by guest | September 2, 2010 at 1:48 AM

    Possibly her–Bobbie Martin:
    http://www.facebook.com/people/Bobbie-Martin/42204534#!/profile.php?id=42204534
    and here:
    http://www.venusmodelsearch.com/2004finalists/BobbieMartin.asp

    Birthday of September 30, 1984 (25 yo) lives in Hoboken, and works for Ashland, Inc. as a chemical sales rep (?)

    On the NFL player–she dated him in college, (Marshall Alum ’06). She was a cheerleader. He is a NY Giants “Star” with at least 4 kids with different women. The player who fits this description is Ahmad Bradshaw.

  14. Posted by Winged Foote | September 2, 2010 at 2:05 AM

    She wants his money to pay for, impress and manipulate the greasy, tanned, bald muscular landscaper with tatoos. Whether it happens now or after she has 3 kids with him its going to happen. She will want the wine collection too.

  15. Posted by Anonymous | September 2, 2010 at 2:37 AM

    you could snip a foreskin on that jawline

  16. Posted by Guest | September 2, 2010 at 5:12 AM

    I call BS on a 34-year-old Goldman VP driving a Maserati and taking a chick on a first date to the Marriott Marquis in Times Square. Though it’s endearing that the writer is impressed with a) a 34-year-old VP, and b) the rotating restaurant.

    Also the most expensive Champagne at that restaurant is $325. (http://www.theviewny.com/restaurant/hotels/hotel-information/travel/nycmq-new-york-marriott-marquis/menus/-view-wine-cocktail)

  17. Posted by icteric | September 2, 2010 at 5:24 AM

    2 x $325 = $650, amount referenced above. Just sayin’.

  18. Posted by Guest | September 2, 2010 at 6:05 AM

    From her friends list, the Goldman VP could be this guy:

    http://www.facebook.com/jon.chu

    http://www.linkedin.com/pub/jonathan-chu/3/561/187

    He is just a technology VP at Goldman.

  19. Posted by Guest | September 2, 2010 at 6:25 AM

    Ahmad Bradshaw also happens to be in her friends list.

  20. Posted by AmericanBandersnatch | September 2, 2010 at 11:36 AM

    So glad I’m married and don’t have to put up with girls pretending they like me just to get at my paycheck.

    My wife stopped pretending years ago

  21. Posted by David Davidson | September 2, 2010 at 12:47 PM

    Yeah, although if you read through her twitter (bobbiechick) she does appear to be thanking him for a recent pair if loubs.

    Also, “Jon” the tipster is probably Jon Thompson, some kind of ex-athlete who is now trying to work maybe at mediate. Her tweets to him (instructions on taking care of her dog, etc) suggest they may be rooming together and the rest of his info fits.

    Don’t know why they’re DELETING FUCKING EVERYTHING…they wanted notoriety, they applied for reality tv!

  22. Posted by Guest | September 2, 2010 at 1:20 PM

    Eh, you can slightly used Maserati’s for like 35k. No biggie. Nearly anyone could get that.

  23. Posted by Anonymous | September 2, 2010 at 1:28 PM

    Venus model search must be scraping the bottom of the barrel these days

  24. Posted by ExtraOrdinaryPopularDelusions | September 2, 2010 at 1:37 PM

    I understand your point, but, “nearly anyone” is a bit off; last I checked most people can’t afford 35k on a car, nor could they afford it on a used car, nor could they afford the repairs. Also, 35k is a bit low.

    In other words, shut up.

  25. Posted by NKVD1938 | September 2, 2010 at 1:41 PM

    And shit like this is why I love the Dealbreaker comment section. Now if somebody can only “out” that skank from a few weeks ago trying to get a job via the Craigslist intimate encounters section.

  26. Posted by Not_PC | September 2, 2010 at 1:51 PM

    He picked her up in his Escalade rolling on 34′s, paid for he meal at Perkins on his EBT card. He’s a “big” baller if you catch my drift.

  27. Posted by ChicagoChick | September 2, 2010 at 1:55 PM

    How does someone get a little thug in them? sounds painful. She is one of my new heros tho

  28. Posted by Big Cat | September 2, 2010 at 2:12 PM

    And they say bankers have no real world skills… The complete outing of everyone involved in 5 hours? Impressive.

  29. Posted by R_hayes2 | September 2, 2010 at 2:38 PM

    A VP at Goldman Sachs should be able to afford a used 2005 Maserati Quattroporte ($35-55k). Difficult to tell 2005 from a 2008. 2009s and newer have slight differences.

  30. Posted by Charlies intern | September 2, 2010 at 2:57 PM

    Facebook pulled, another life ruined, or maybe made better by Dealbreaker.

    Now that is a pitch for a reality show: Getting Outed by the Dealbreaker Comments Section: the Aftermath.

  31. Posted by Ani_703 | September 2, 2010 at 3:45 PM

    You are awesome and a genius detective.

  32. Posted by Guest | September 2, 2010 at 4:05 PM

    You do realize that a Ford Taurus is 37-47k new? Other than the insurance and maintenance they’re the same… so Maserati > BMW 5 series.

  33. Posted by Teebol | September 2, 2010 at 4:26 PM

    you guys are fucking awesome!

  34. Posted by ExtraOrdinaryPopularDelusions | September 2, 2010 at 4:35 PM

    And you understand that “nearly everyone” earn 38k a year and buy 5k-10k cars? And that insurance and maintenance is a big issue for “nearly everyone”, especially when it tacks on another 10-20k?

    I realize that we’re all pretty much in the top 5-10% of income on the entire planet here but “nearly everyone” earns crap, and I would expect people who specialize in finance to be aware of something that financially basic.

  35. Posted by BackOfficeSales | September 2, 2010 at 5:40 PM

    In Soviet Russia, $50,000 buy you small Asian man

  36. Posted by Big Cat | September 2, 2010 at 6:16 PM

    Pretty good for someone from the back office

  37. Posted by guest | September 2, 2010 at 9:20 PM

    And now for something completely meta, from Gawker Comments:

    printersanonymous 01:06 AM

    Looks like someone on dealbreaker.com already found her:

    Possibly her–Bobbie Martin:
    [www.facebook.com]
    and here:
    [www.venusmodelsearch.com]

    Birthday of September 30, 1984 (25 yo) lives in Hoboken, and works for Ashland, Inc. as a chemical sales rep (?)

    [dealbreaker.com]

    ektorp 01:57 AM

    And from her friends list, the VP at Goldman could be this guy:

    [www.facebook.com]

    [www.linkedin.com]

    Brilliant!

    heywhat 02:15 AM
    [...]

    ektorp 02:35 AM

    And as the Dealbreaker commenters pointed out, the NFL player could be Ahmad Bradshaw, who would have been in college at Marshall at the same time as Bobbie Martin (Marshall alum ’06 according to the FB profile) while they dated and now plays for the Giants. He is also in her friends list and has a few kids with different women.

    @ektorp: That LinkedIn dude is in IT at Goldman – I don’t think he could be pushing a Maserati. If it’s him, he’s really desperate to land this chick if he’s spending that kind of cash.
    LeeroySpitzer 05:29 AM

    @printersanonymous: @ektorp: Both Facebooks have been deleted. Looks like we have a winner.
    INDISTINCTCHATTER 07:51 AM

    @printersanonymous: Too good to be true. Thank you Internet! SomeLikeItRED 09:22 AM

    Invite a friend to comment
    @printersanonymous: damn good work Nancy Drew, you got ‘em again annieuro 09:35 AM

    @LeeroySpitzer: Mwahahaha…that was what I was thinking.

    What’s with the early 90′s lookin’ swimsuits the girl is wearing? Hello Jesse Spano. Reply
    atotalcad 09:56 AM

    [...]

    Invite a friend to comment
    @atotalcad: @annieuro: @SomeLikeItRED: @INDISTINCTCHATTER: @LeeroySpitzer: @dukes_up: @oh no i di’n't: @heywhat: @ektorp: What I’m really curious to know is whether she encouraged Jon to email the networks or not. The last paragraph seems to indicate that she had some knowledge of Jon’s email, but if that’s the case, what the hell were either of them thinking??? This seems like a plot hatched in the throws of a coke bender. Like: Ohmygodwouldntitbehilariousifi…. Dumb. Dumb. Dumb.

    @printersanonymous: now that everyone knows who she is, the networks can give Jon a real NY welcome and cut him out of the deal. Reply
    printersanonymous promoted this comment
    printersanonymous 02:22 PM

    @SomeLikeItRED: Thank Anonymous over at dealbreaker and google. Thanks for the Nancy Drew comment, though. I should go out and solve some crimes today…after another coffee.

  38. Posted by Mparletta | September 10, 2010 at 11:09 PM

    You ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. HOLLY SHIT THATS HER. I met her last week when she and her boss came to my office to promote their company’s services. Ashland is a large company that specializes in hazardous waste management. I remembered how how hot she was because I couldn’t stop starring at her. She told me she was from NC and was now living in Hoboken NJ. After seeing her, I felt compelled to learn more about her and the company

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