As you may have heard, the hot new accessory this season, if you’re running for office, is to produce an attack ad highlighting your opponent’s ties to Wall Street. Deal Journal has rounded up a bunch of them, including one by Rush Holt, who’s running for Congress in New Jersey against former Morgan Stanley hedge fund manager Scott Sipprelle. Let’s take a look.
Confused? We’ve obtained the strategy session that gave birth to the spot.
Rush Holt: We need to make this Sipprelle guy look bad.
Producer: Okay well, he used to work on Wall Street and The People hate Wall Street, so let’s go with something about that.
Rush Holt: Yes, great idea, he used to be a hedge fund manager and those are the WORST kind of Wall Street people.
Producer: Okay, LIGHTBULB. You know those segments they do on the Jay Leno show? Jaywalking?
Holt: No, haven’t seen them.
Producer: Well, basically they walk up to a bunch of people and ask them a question and then wait for them to not know the answer and look like an idiot.
Holt: Okay but we’ll do the opposite? Interview a bunch of my potential constituents about hedge funds and only keep the clips of the smartest ones that’ll be able to convincingly make the case that these guys are evil?
Producer: No, not exactly. What we’re going to do is interview the DUMBEST ones, who by their own admission have zero idea what a hedge fund manager does. The dumber the better. In fact, we’re going to highlight their ignorance re: what a hedge fund manager does.
Holt: Ooooo I love it; that’ll really nail this guy to the wall!
Producer: Yes, the point will be clear.
Stop enraging me with these posts, I feel like I am being cyber bullied and should jump off the George Washington Bridge
The correct answer is go to a prestigious university, get into a bulge bracket after college, start your own shop, then try to cram as many markers up your employees asses
The correct answer is go to a prestigious university, get into a bulge bracket after college, start your own shop, then try to cram as many markers up your employees asses
I hate political ads and the lying liars that think them up. Pls post a piece on penises (or something that can be analogized thereto) so we can get back to what’s important…dick and kookah jokes. Thx Bess. xoxo
1) Manage some funds
2) Hedge the shit out of them
3) ???
4) Profit
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nhh2288zNVE
Relevance?
/s
5) Trade on the reg.
6) Get drunk on the reg.
hedge fundz mahnajuz payz forz my pension, and my beemah… going to high school and smoking dope iz NKI
“there weren’t hedge fund managers 20 years ago”
true, and the same can be said about ipods, plasma televisions, EZ Pass, Cialas, etc
Fuckinig old bag is against CHANGE!!
Rush Holt is Steve Holt’s adopted father, so STFU.
Holt had no problem supporting Jon Corzine, though.
Holt had no problem supporting Jon Corzine, though.
As do I PMCO but I had to post this one because it HURTS MY BRAIN. It’s not the lies it’s the fact that it makes NO SENSE– how does this make Sipprelle look bad? How???
You Want details? Fine. I drive a Ferrari, 355 Cabriolet, What’s up? I have a ridiculous house in the South Fork. I have every toy you could possibly imagine. And best of all kids, I am liquid.
-Other than that I have no concerns
Perhaps the most frustrating point of stupidity is that Scott Sipprelle is not a hedge fund manager, but a venture capitalist.
in soviet russia, hedge funds manage YOU!
No, it’s GOB Bluth.
Girl at 0:11 – 0:19
Interior light on.
I do the following:
- Count my beans
- Short “Good”
- Long “Evil”
- Juggle kittens
- Shut down mom & pop upholstery stores
- Hedge Fund Manager
Hey, is that from that ‘Boiler Room’ movie???
This cheered me up, I just stepped back from the ledge. In return, I leave you with this:
Thank you for being a friend
Traveled down the road and back again
Well, your heart is true, you’re a pal and a confidante.
I am a hedge fund manager. What does a hedge fund manager do?
“…if [investments] don’t do well, that’s OK too!”
Truer words have never been said.
-JWM
I see what you did there
did oliver stone just make a documentary about you?
…aaaannnd Its Gene Parmesean!
We cut our fees to 1.5/15, we gave you transparency, we almost paid back redemptions in cash, we underperformed the markets in 2009, we continued to spend our money extravegantly, we bailed out Target, we occasionally throw charity events, we single handidly kept Park Ave prices up. Seriously what else do you want from us?
You left off “kick puppies into traffic”.
rescue kittens like they do at GS
This is the same Sipprelle whose hedge fund Copper Arch tanked in 2007, isn’t it? Maybe the voters should know that …
This is the same Sipprelle whose hedge fund Copper Arch tanked in 2007, isn’t it? Maybe the voters should know that …
Haters gonna hate.
Pretty sure you could have asked that group of Mensa candidates “What does Congress do” and gotten approximately the same answers. If you really wanted to mess with them, follow up with “What is Facebook”?
Also forgot to mention:
- Fund terrorism
- Dabble in Satanism
This makes Sipprelle look bad by making his opponent and constituency (and by extention, humanity) look bad.
Two reactions:
1) …what..the…fuck.
2) Anyone got $5 and a camera? Let’s make a “What does a Rush Holt do?” video…
fair amount of gambling going on with people’s money = YES! winner!
They fuck their mothers.
Oh Gene! Got me again…
I think I met one of those hedge fund managers in the garden section of Home Depot?
Become mutual fund managers.
- Zing
I don’t know what a cattle farmer does either, but that doesn’t make him evil, that just makes me ignorant.
They raise cattle.
So a hedge fund manager must raise hedges.
See how easy it is. Sheesh.
- D Hertz
Eat their mothers!
Noooooooooooooooo