Yesterday Bloomberg reported that Goldman Sachs had pulled its entire $120 million investment from Harbinger Capital’s flagship fund, citing two reasons: 1) the returns were poor and 2) Phil Falcone had “loaned” himself $113 from one of the firm’s smaller funds (at a time when redemptions were suspended) in order to pay personal taxes, which didn’t sit well with some people. Now, someone inside Harbinger is claiming that Goldman was totally cool with the fund’s performance and could care less about Falcone helping himself to a li’l cash. The real reason is that they’re just jealous.

According to a source there, the hedge fund manager believes that Goldman Sachs isn’t actually upset about the $113 million withdrawal for taxes, or even his returns, but is simply still miffed that he successfully poached hedge fund star Omar Asali last year. Mr. Asali had been the co-head of Goldman Sachs Hedge Fund Strategies, and is said to now be in charge of Harbinger’s global portfolio strategy and analytics, with risk management responsibilities, too.

Also said to be a factor in the decision was Goldman’s bitterness over Lisa Falcone stealing the lyrics to what was supposed to be the hit single on their debut album, “Everybody throw your hands in the air, ugly bitches too, we don’t care.” And in a similarly petty move, sources close to the situation are citing the reason for Blackstone’s Harbinger withdraw to be Steve Schwarzman’s envy over the Falcones having the most talented barnyard animal in Manhattan on staff, when he can’t even get his Doberman to dance.

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Comments (36)

  1. Posted by Guest | November 11, 2010 at 5:14 PM

    I believe Phil bought Omar over only because Lisa said she “just had to have one to play with and because none of her friends had one.”

  2. Posted by Guesting quietly | November 11, 2010 at 5:18 PM

    I hear the pig is pretty talented too.

  3. Posted by Anonymous | November 11, 2010 at 5:20 PM

    “Also said to be a factor in the decision was growing Goldman’s bitterness over Falcone having the most talented barnyard animal in Manhattan on staff.”

    Did you hear he has a pig too?

  4. Posted by Anonymous | November 11, 2010 at 5:25 PM

    you beat me

  5. Posted by trojan | November 11, 2010 at 5:25 PM

    he was poached from UBS

  6. Posted by Meatbone9 | November 11, 2010 at 5:36 PM

    Mmmm poached pig.

  7. Posted by CS | November 11, 2010 at 5:44 PM

    Until Falcone’s can sing “Closet Bitch”, Marc Lasry’s pet pig is the most talented in Manhattan

  8. Posted by AmericanBandersnatch | November 11, 2010 at 5:53 PM

    Goldman’s a punk outfit. In my league, a guy named Omar who tries to play for more than one team ends up hanging from a helicopter,
    – Tony M, Miami, FL.

  9. Posted by Anonymous | November 11, 2010 at 6:04 PM

    Playa haters.

  10. Posted by Milburn Drysdale | November 11, 2010 at 6:11 PM

    Milburn Drysdale, Goldman Sachs VP dictating a letter: “….And further, Mrs. Jones, if you miss another mortgage payment I’ll have you thrown out in the street.”

    Jane Hathaway, Administrative Assistant to Mr. Drysdale: “But Chief, Mrs. Jones is an 88 year old widow confined to a wheelchair!!”

    Milburn Drysdale, Goldman Sachs VP: “Oh my gosh, you’re right. Change that to “I’ll have you wheeled out onto the street.”

  11. Posted by Guest | November 11, 2010 at 6:13 PM

    Kim Kardashian and Falcone are going to be partners a boutique in Manhattan called “Doosh”.

  12. Posted by Community Organizer | November 11, 2010 at 6:33 PM

    It is not the fund returns, the fund strategy or the borrowing of cash for taxes that motivated Goldman to redeem; it was simply Goldman’s inability to understand our substantial results and accomplishments. Clearly we should have better communicated our successes over the last two years.

  13. Posted by Chris Brown's Punching bag | November 11, 2010 at 6:59 PM

    Mamase Mamasa Mamacusa Mamase Mamasa Mamacusa Mamase Mamasa Mamacusa Mamase Mamasa Mamacusa

    Please don’t stop the music

  14. Posted by Guest | November 11, 2010 at 7:04 PM

    That dress/duvet/whatever it is never gets old.

  15. Posted by Guest | November 11, 2010 at 7:28 PM

    that picture looks like something Louis XIV might have dreamed of if liked womanly dudes

  16. Posted by Anonymous | November 11, 2010 at 8:12 PM


  17. Posted by Bodie | November 11, 2010 at 10:54 PM

    Omar comin’! Omar comin’!

  18. Posted by Martink | November 12, 2010 at 5:45 AM

    She is cursed and he is going down the drain….Wait and SEC…..

  19. Posted by Anonymous | November 13, 2010 at 5:41 AM

    is the boutique selling bags?

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